krisp
03-26-04, 09:37 AM
This is an excerpt from an article by Sally L. Smith, published in Pediatric Nursing, May/June 2002 Volume 28/Number 3.
Because it can be frustrating to parent children with learning disabilities and behavioral challenges, it is encouraging for parents to know that some of the negative behaviors of their children very often become positive attributes in adulthood. For example, the most stubborn children often turn out to have fierce determination. The most manipulative children often turn out to be fabulous entrepreneurs, leaders, or politicians. The children who argue all the time like jail house lawyers actually become lawyers, and those who doodle and draw all through school may well become artists in adulthood. In 35 years of experience at the Lab School in Washington, DC, this pattern has been evidenced again and again. The boy who sold his mother's jewelry for 25 cents apiece grew up to be a real estate mogul. The boys who were tinkerers, taking everything apart, became mechanical engineers. The girl who tried to help her classmates avoid arguing, who was teased because she was always trying to make peace and never projected any opinion of her own, became a mediator - and a good one at that! Numbers of very hyperactive youngsters have turned out to be very energetic, productive entrepreneurs. The inflexible one way kids have often become scientists who study one problem in depth for many years or airplane controllers who focus intensely on the task at hand. Many bright children with ADHD, who were impulsive, very distractible, and had poor attention spans, have grown up to be outstanding emergency health care specialists, paramedics, and firemen. In an emergency, their adrenaline is apparently stimulated, so they become highly focused, able to put their excellent analytic abilities to use while doing many tasks.
Self-care should be a priority for parents of children with learning disabilities. Parents themselves need nurturing to help nurture their child with special needs. They need to go out and have fun regularly. They need more sleep than other parents, for these children sap their energy, and their condition demands help from parents constantly. Finding supportive friends or relatives, or locating a support group or an online parent support community can provide a place for parents to vent frustrations and obtain valuable suggestions, strategies, and support. Laughter is also important for parents and the whole family. Children with learning disabilities and ADHD need to feel that it is not the end of the world that they have these disabilities - nuisances - and they need to laugh at some of the nonsense they go through. Parents, too, need lightness and humor. When parents can have fun with their children - even being silly and laughing - and can enjoy life as much as possible together, everyone benefits.
It is hard to be a grownup, difficult to be a parent, even more challenging to be a parent of a child with special needs when the parent must become the analyst, the interpreter, the problem solver, the cheerleader, the lawyer, the psychiatrist, the spiritual advisor, the organizer, the notetaker, the friend, companion, advocate, and disciplinarian. Most parents use every resource they have to help their child flourish, and yet, they worry they are not doing enough or a good enough job. Chances are parents are doing an incredibly fine job under difficult circumstances.
Because it can be frustrating to parent children with learning disabilities and behavioral challenges, it is encouraging for parents to know that some of the negative behaviors of their children very often become positive attributes in adulthood. For example, the most stubborn children often turn out to have fierce determination. The most manipulative children often turn out to be fabulous entrepreneurs, leaders, or politicians. The children who argue all the time like jail house lawyers actually become lawyers, and those who doodle and draw all through school may well become artists in adulthood. In 35 years of experience at the Lab School in Washington, DC, this pattern has been evidenced again and again. The boy who sold his mother's jewelry for 25 cents apiece grew up to be a real estate mogul. The boys who were tinkerers, taking everything apart, became mechanical engineers. The girl who tried to help her classmates avoid arguing, who was teased because she was always trying to make peace and never projected any opinion of her own, became a mediator - and a good one at that! Numbers of very hyperactive youngsters have turned out to be very energetic, productive entrepreneurs. The inflexible one way kids have often become scientists who study one problem in depth for many years or airplane controllers who focus intensely on the task at hand. Many bright children with ADHD, who were impulsive, very distractible, and had poor attention spans, have grown up to be outstanding emergency health care specialists, paramedics, and firemen. In an emergency, their adrenaline is apparently stimulated, so they become highly focused, able to put their excellent analytic abilities to use while doing many tasks.
Self-care should be a priority for parents of children with learning disabilities. Parents themselves need nurturing to help nurture their child with special needs. They need to go out and have fun regularly. They need more sleep than other parents, for these children sap their energy, and their condition demands help from parents constantly. Finding supportive friends or relatives, or locating a support group or an online parent support community can provide a place for parents to vent frustrations and obtain valuable suggestions, strategies, and support. Laughter is also important for parents and the whole family. Children with learning disabilities and ADHD need to feel that it is not the end of the world that they have these disabilities - nuisances - and they need to laugh at some of the nonsense they go through. Parents, too, need lightness and humor. When parents can have fun with their children - even being silly and laughing - and can enjoy life as much as possible together, everyone benefits.
It is hard to be a grownup, difficult to be a parent, even more challenging to be a parent of a child with special needs when the parent must become the analyst, the interpreter, the problem solver, the cheerleader, the lawyer, the psychiatrist, the spiritual advisor, the organizer, the notetaker, the friend, companion, advocate, and disciplinarian. Most parents use every resource they have to help their child flourish, and yet, they worry they are not doing enough or a good enough job. Chances are parents are doing an incredibly fine job under difficult circumstances.