View Full Version : Educating my parents


Darkangel001
12-30-08, 09:18 AM
Hey,

I am looking for a good easy to read book, that I can slip somewhere at home, to get my parents to realise that one my sisters, like me, most definitely has Inattentive ADD- It would be good if the book, also explained some of this things to her- because my parents have got rosy glasses when it comes to us, and my dad is refusing to get her to the doctor, because he does not want to 'stigmatize her'- she's in the 6th form- she can still make it with support- but she is on the verge of being chucked out- I don't know what else to do- but I don't want to cause any trouble. I am at Uni most of the time and I cannot rely on my sister being able to talk about her symptoms to the doctor- she just doesn't know how to put her ideas accross in an afluent manner at all.

She is really bright, and creative, but this is just shooting her in the foot, and it's really breaking my heart- because she already has such low self-esteem I don't want her to fail.

Does anyone have any suggestion whatsoever on how I could tackle this?

Driver
12-30-08, 09:22 AM
Have you been officially diagnosed? If so, you can point out that ADD is genetic and that one or more of your parents has it too.

Also, as their worried about the stigma of the label, why not explain to the them the stigmas of undiagnosed ADD: substance abuse, failed education, failed jobs, unwanted pregnancies, ...

Darkangel001
12-30-08, 09:58 AM
I am waiting to be officially diagnosed myself- my parents don't know- I don't think they'll be pleased whether I tell them or not- I am in limbo- damned whatever I do.

Even when I do get diagnosed- I never planned on telling them- it would be a huge part of my life- but it was my choice to make- it's just not so simple anymore, because what I say could be really affect my sister. I am completely at loss. This is why I wanted to find a good book on the subject so that if my parents could not be convinced she could go to the doc on her own and explain her symptoms

Darkangel001
12-30-08, 10:00 AM
There are not going to listen- my mom won't do anything without my dad's permission- and he is dead set against it- they don't even know I am being assessed.

That's why I wanted to find a book so that my sis could take it with her and explain her symptoms better

Driver
12-31-08, 12:32 AM
I don't have any book recommendations, but I reckon you should wait until you're officially assessed; it'll make it easier for her because then there's the family history of ADD.

timtam
12-31-08, 09:47 AM
one of the best books on ADHD i found that is written clearly and objectively is:<link rel="File-List" href="file:///D:%5CUsers%5CTimmy%5CAppData%5CLocal%5CTemp%5Cmsoh tmlclip1%5C01%5Cclip_filelist.xml"><!--[if gte mso 9]><xml> <o:OfficeDocumentSettings> <o:RelyOnVML/> <o:AllowPNG/> </o:OfficeDocumentSettings> </xml><![endif]--><link rel="themeData" href="file:///D:%5CUsers%5CTimmy%5CAppData%5CLocal%5CTemp%5Cmsoh tmlclip1%5C01%5Cclip_themedata.thmx"><link rel="colorSchemeMapping" href="file:///D:%5CUsers%5CTimmy%5CAppData%5CLocal%5CTemp%5Cmsoh tmlclip1%5C01%5Cclip_colorschememapping.xml"><!--[if gte mso 9]><xml> <w:WordDocument> <w:View>Normal</w:View> <w:Zoom>0</w:Zoom> <w:TrackMoves/> <w:TrackFormatting/> <w:PunctuationKerning/> <w:ValidateAgainstSchemas/> <w:SaveIfXMLInvalid>false</w:SaveIfXMLInvalid> <w:IgnoreMixedContent>false</w:IgnoreMixedContent> <w:AlwaysShowPlaceholderText>false</w:AlwaysShowPlaceholderText> <w:DoNotPromoteQF/> <w:LidThemeOther>EN-AU</w:LidThemeOther> 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mso-fareast-theme-font:minor-latin; mso-hansi-font-family:Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font:minor-latin; mso-bidi-font-family:"Times New Roman"; mso-bidi-theme-font:minor-bidi; mso-fareast-language:EN-US;} .MsoChpDefault {mso-style-type:export-only; mso-default-props:yes; mso-ascii-font-family:Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font:minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family:Calibri; mso-fareast-theme-font:minor-latin; mso-hansi-font-family:Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font:minor-latin; mso-bidi-font-family:"Times New Roman"; mso-bidi-theme-font:minor-bidi; mso-fareast-language:EN-US;} .MsoPapDefault {mso-style-type:export-only; margin-bottom:10.0pt; line-height:115%;} @page Section1 {size:612.0pt 792.0pt; margin:72.0pt 72.0pt 72.0pt 72.0pt; mso-header-margin:36.0pt; mso-footer-margin:36.0pt; mso-paper-source:0;} div.Section1 {page:Section1;} --> </style><!--[if gte mso 10]> <style> /* Style Definitions */ table.MsoNormalTable {mso-style-name:"Table Normal"; mso-tstyle-rowband-size:0; mso-tstyle-colband-size:0; mso-style-noshow:yes; mso-style-priority:99; mso-style-qformat:yes; mso-style-parent:""; mso-padding-alt:0cm 5.4pt 0cm 5.4pt; mso-para-margin-top:0cm; mso-para-margin-right:0cm; mso-para-margin-bottom:10.0pt; mso-para-margin-left:0cm; line-height:115%; mso-pagination:widow-orphan; font-size:11.0pt; font-family:"Calibri","sans-serif"; mso-ascii-font-family:Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font:minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family:"Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-theme-font:minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family:Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font:minor-latin;} </style> <![endif]--> Brown, Thomas E. (2005). Attention Deficit Disorder: The Unfocused Mind in Children and Adults. New Haven: Yale University Press.

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mso-fareast-theme-font:minor-latin; mso-hansi-font-family:Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font:minor-latin; mso-bidi-font-family:"Times New Roman"; mso-bidi-theme-font:minor-bidi; mso-fareast-language:EN-US;} .MsoChpDefault {mso-style-type:export-only; mso-default-props:yes; mso-ascii-font-family:Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font:minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family:Calibri; mso-fareast-theme-font:minor-latin; mso-hansi-font-family:Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font:minor-latin; mso-bidi-font-family:"Times New Roman"; mso-bidi-theme-font:minor-bidi; mso-fareast-language:EN-US;} .MsoPapDefault {mso-style-type:export-only; margin-bottom:10.0pt; line-height:115%;} @page Section1 {size:612.0pt 792.0pt; margin:72.0pt 72.0pt 72.0pt 72.0pt; mso-header-margin:36.0pt; mso-footer-margin:36.0pt; mso-paper-source:0;} div.Section1 {page:Section1;} --> </style><!--[if gte mso 10]> <style> /* Style Definitions */ table.MsoNormalTable {mso-style-name:"Table Normal"; mso-tstyle-rowband-size:0; mso-tstyle-colband-size:0; mso-style-noshow:yes; mso-style-priority:99; mso-style-qformat:yes; mso-style-parent:""; mso-padding-alt:0cm 5.4pt 0cm 5.4pt; mso-para-margin-top:0cm; mso-para-margin-right:0cm; mso-para-margin-bottom:10.0pt; mso-para-margin-left:0cm; line-height:115%; mso-pagination:widow-orphan; font-size:11.0pt; font-family:"Calibri","sans-serif"; mso-ascii-font-family:Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font:minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family:"Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-theme-font:minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family:Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font:minor-latin;} </style> <![endif]--> Buttross, Susan. (2007). Understanding Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder. Jackson: University Press of Mississippi.

(i'm having trouble posting the rest of my reply. it keeps saying that the text is over 45,000 characters, which it clearly is not. so i guess i'll have to double, or even triple, post)

timtam
12-31-08, 09:50 AM
cont.
and, this one, which, like it's title says, examines the causes as well as symptoms of ADHD is:<link rel="File-List" href="file:///D:%5CUsers%5CTimmy%5CAppData%5CLocal%5CTemp%5Cmsoh tmlclip1%5C01%5Cclip_filelist.xml"><!--[if gte mso 9]><xml> <o:OfficeDocumentSettings> <o:RelyOnVML/> <o:AllowPNG/> </o:OfficeDocumentSettings> </xml><![endif]--><link rel="themeData" href="file:///D:%5CUsers%5CTimmy%5CAppData%5CLocal%5CTemp%5Cmsoh tmlclip1%5C01%5Cclip_themedata.thmx"><link rel="colorSchemeMapping" href="file:///D:%5CUsers%5CTimmy%5CAppData%5CLocal%5CTemp%5Cmsoh tmlclip1%5C01%5Cclip_colorschememapping.xml"><!--[if gte mso 9]><xml> <w:WordDocument> <w:View>Normal</w:View> <w:Zoom>0</w:Zoom> <w:TrackMoves/> <w:TrackFormatting/> <w:PunctuationKerning/> <w:ValidateAgainstSchemas/> <w:SaveIfXMLInvalid>false</w:SaveIfXMLInvalid> <w:IgnoreMixedContent>false</w:IgnoreMixedContent> <w:AlwaysShowPlaceholderText>false</w:AlwaysShowPlaceholderText> <w:DoNotPromoteQF/> 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mso-tstyle-rowband-size:0; mso-tstyle-colband-size:0; mso-style-noshow:yes; mso-style-priority:99; mso-style-qformat:yes; mso-style-parent:""; mso-padding-alt:0cm 5.4pt 0cm 5.4pt; mso-para-margin-top:0cm; mso-para-margin-right:0cm; mso-para-margin-bottom:10.0pt; mso-para-margin-left:0cm; line-height:115%; mso-pagination:widow-orphan; font-size:11.0pt; font-family:"Calibri","sans-serif"; mso-ascii-font-family:Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font:minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family:"Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-theme-font:minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family:Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font:minor-latin;} </style> <![endif]--> Nigg, Joel T. (2006). What Causes ADHD? Understanding What Goes Wrong and Why. London: Guilford Press.

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</style><!--[if gte mso 10]> <style> /* Style Definitions */ table.MsoNormalTable {mso-style-name:"Table Normal"; mso-tstyle-rowband-size:0; mso-tstyle-colband-size:0; mso-style-noshow:yes; mso-style-priority:99; mso-style-qformat:yes; mso-style-parent:""; mso-padding-alt:0cm 5.4pt 0cm 5.4pt; mso-para-margin-top:0cm; mso-para-margin-right:0cm; mso-para-margin-bottom:10.0pt; mso-para-margin-left:0cm; line-height:115%; mso-pagination:widow-orphan; font-size:11.0pt; font-family:"Calibri","sans-serif"; mso-ascii-font-family:Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font:minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family:"Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-theme-font:minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family:Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font:minor-latin;} </style> <![endif]--> Barkley, Russell A. (2006). Attention-Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder: A Handbook for Diagnosis and Treatment. London: The Guilford Press.

(this is getting annoying)

timtam
12-31-08, 09:53 AM
cont.

and this one, which composes of individual articles on specific topics:
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Handbook of Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder. Chichester: John Wiley & Sons.

but the one book that has been most productive, if not indispensable, for me is:<link rel="File-List" href="file:///D:%5CUsers%5CTimmy%5CAppData%5CLocal%5CTemp%5Cmsoh tmlclip1%5C01%5Cclip_filelist.xml"><!--[if gte mso 9]><xml> <o:OfficeDocumentSettings> <o:RelyOnVML/> <o:AllowPNG/> </o:OfficeDocumentSettings> </xml><![endif]--><link rel="themeData" href="file:///D:%5CUsers%5CTimmy%5CAppData%5CLocal%5CTemp%5Cmsoh tmlclip1%5C01%5Cclip_themedata.thmx"><link rel="colorSchemeMapping" href="file:///D:%5CUsers%5CTimmy%5CAppData%5CLocal%5CTemp%5Cmsoh tmlclip1%5C01%5Cclip_colorschememapping.xml"><!--[if gte mso 9]><xml> <w:WordDocument> <w:View>Normal</w:View> <w:Zoom>0</w:Zoom> <w:TrackMoves/> <w:TrackFormatting/> <w:PunctuationKerning/> <w:ValidateAgainstSchemas/> <w:SaveIfXMLInvalid>false</w:SaveIfXMLInvalid> <w:IgnoreMixedContent>false</w:IgnoreMixedContent> <w:AlwaysShowPlaceholderText>false</w:AlwaysShowPlaceholderText> <w:DoNotPromoteQF/> <w:LidThemeOther>EN-AU</w:LidThemeOther> 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mso-tstyle-colband-size:0; mso-style-noshow:yes; mso-style-priority:99; mso-style-qformat:yes; mso-style-parent:""; mso-padding-alt:0cm 5.4pt 0cm 5.4pt; mso-para-margin-top:0cm; mso-para-margin-right:0cm; mso-para-margin-bottom:10.0pt; mso-para-margin-left:0cm; line-height:115%; mso-pagination:widow-orphan; font-size:11.0pt; font-family:"Calibri","sans-serif"; mso-ascii-font-family:Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font:minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family:"Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-theme-font:minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family:Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font:minor-latin;} </style> <![endif]--> Young, Susan and Bramham, Jessica (2006). ADHD in Adults: A Psychological Guide to Practice. Chichester: John Wiley & Sons.

i have PDF copies of all these books and 20-odd other ones on ADHD, but i'm not sure of the rules here on sharing.

Darkangel001
01-01-09, 09:46 PM
You can send them to me directly :)
I have read Tom Brown's book, it's like my ADD bible- but it's really big and there is no way my parents are ever going to read something like that on their- reading is something they just do not do- which is why I am sort of hoping to maybe finding a good add parenting book or summin?

Still thanks for the suggestion, would love to have those files if you can, I am determined to go to my shrink organized and prepared for once.