does anyone else have trouble shopping?? i need new clothes but i CANT shop. i literally have clothes from years ago because i get so overhelmed by clothing stores and cant commit to anything!! i WANT to shop and i try and go but i end up wandering for hours and come back emptynhanded and frustrated. With food shopping or any household stuff i take FOREVER because i need to look at EVERYTHING, every brand, every price, compare everything. it takes me so long to pick out one product. anyone else have the same problem???? :confused:

WOW! Talk about great timing. My wife and I just went through this yesterday. She needs some new clothes, and I wanted her to go get some. We were both raised somewhat with little means financially, and she is still very cheap when it comes to buying things. She goes straight for clearance and the search for the biggest, greatest deal on some cheap item and need to look at everything overwhelms her and she comes home frustrated, with nothing. So, yesterday, I gave her a couple hundred dollars to go get some things with. Before, she would never think of spending $20 on a single shirt, she had to get one for $10 or less, which just isn't always realistic. She would spend time looking at the $40 shirts and wanting them, but never thought she could have them. I said "why not"? If you have the money to do it, and you want the $40 shirt, buy it.

Have you ever watched "What Not To Wear" on TLC? They give the people that can't shop for clothes rules to follow, structure to make them go for what they should be buying and wearing. That's what I did yesterday for my wife. I told her to NOT shop the clearance whatsoever, and that if she just had to, to limit herself to 10 minutes. If she couldn't find that great buy in 10 minutes, and time is money, then she might as well buy the more expensive items.

I also gave her price ranges. I told her that I wanted her to spend x amount for a pair of pants, jeans, shirts, a belt, etc. I showed her that she could spend more than she thought on each item and still get what she needed.

I also told her that there is ALWAYS a better deal out there, or a shirt that you would like better. However, that is battle you can't win. Instead, go in with a plan, saying that you are going to buy this this this and this. Then set a realistic, not cheap,price that you can pay for each item, and go directly to the area of the store that is in that price range. Find the item that fits you that you like and buy it. If you like it and it fits, you are done. You don't have to go keep looking for something better, because by doing so you only overwhelm yourself and end up frustrated, and coming home with nothing because you get so frustrated.

The end result? She spend about $230 yesterday and got like 14 different items, from pants to belts to shirts and more! She went to JC Penney's and Dillards, and they have just about everything on sale after Christmas. She got stuff on sale without having to shop for the best deal, because pretty much everything was on sale anyway. But the biggest deal is that she had FUN shopping, because the pressure was off. Go, find one item that fits the price range and type of item you want, and that you like, and then buy it and be done. Sure, she may have missed some deal or maybe even something she might have liked a tiny bit more, but who cares? She came home happy, with bags full of items, and what more can you ask.

Yes, I'm a guy, and yes, I told my wife how to shop. I'm a weird one, and I realize that, lol.

with clothes I usually end up with something, it's a different story when I'm over weight. I'm sure you know that whole deal or atleast understand, even if you didn't have ADD, you'd be frustrated and empty handed lots of times if you're over weight.

Anyways, I usually end up wanting everything in the store and then I add things up after i've picked up everything and decide if i really need it or really like it. With food i usually get what i'm in the mood for or whatever i see completely forgetting what i came to get. Lists help though and then at the end, like i did with clothes, take things out. I just let myself have fun, it's stupid to stress over. I get so lost in time that it doesn't feel like i'm taking as long as I really am. You're rewarding yourself if you think about it. But I have a feeling you might be talking about it taking forever when you are so busy and stressed with your real life, that you're just like god can i really go faster i have so much to do and this task doesn't seem neccessary so instead you see it as a burden. Sometimes it helps to go shopping with other people at this point, they're positive, but they're pushing your butt to get to the check out line!

I hate it too!!!
when an item strikes you - look closer at it. price ok? comfortable? try it on!
If you have too precise an idea before you leave the house, you might have more trouble. - I've been looking for this ideal black knit dress (I mean like a long sweater) for 3 years I think.

lol weird.
i think looking at it closer and trying to put that train of thinking, might be what she said as frustrating, not only to think about it, but to remember with every item!

I remember when I was about 12 years old, my Aunt took me shopping. I was thrilled, and felt so grown up! :p She told me while we were there that she found shopping to be stressful and hated it. I was surprised at that. I appreciated that she would do something that made her so uncomfortable just to see me happy. But I just couldn't see how someone would not like shopping! :confused:

Fast forward to now...

Now when I go shopping, I have to make all of the decisions and look at things and figure out where to go next and deal with the people and the noise and worry about how much I am spending and is this a good enough deal .... :eek:

I totally understand why she hates shopping! I was at the grocery last week and as I was waiting in line, I stopped for a moment and looked around me. I realized how overwhelming it all was for me. It felt good to realize that even though most people enjoy shopping, there are overwhelmed people like me all over the world.

Mike described to you my shopping trip yesterday. It actually was fun for me!! He gave me a pep talk before I went. Something that helped me the most was my determination to not look at everything. Usually my drive to find the best deal possible fills me with frustration. This time I didn't worry about that "best deal" getting away from me. Like Mike said, I usually come home empty handed. This time I just focused on finding what I liked. I had a plan and that helped out tremendously.

I am interested to see if I can make that translate into grocery shopping. Although I will NEVER like shopping for groceries! :p

my parents go shopping for me , i was supposed to get myself to go buy winter clothes but i was just too lazy so my parents bought some for me....ah lala

Yes, I find certain types of shopping completely overwhelming because of an overabundance of choices. This is a pretty serious issue. Dr. Barry Schwartz has written a very interesting book on this topic if you want to read it. Here's a video talk:

http://www.ted.com/index.php/talks/barry_schwartz_on_the_paradox_of_choice.html

I hate clothes shopping for exactly this reason. I have no idea how to put an outfit together. I have a solution that sounds expensive, but it isn't because I buy so infrequently: I enlist the sales women. I pack all of my shoes into a bag, schlep the bag into the store, camp out in the dressing room, and send the sales women out to pick out outfits. I buy high quality stuff and always get more than one outfit in a single mix-and-match color scheme. I make sure that I have all the belts, shoes, purses, etc. to put the outfit together, and then I don't buy again for YEARS. I have not bought suits in probably six years and I still get compliments on the suits that I have.

In the end, I spend far less on clothes than friends who bargain hunt, just because I don't go that often.

I enjoy grocery shopping, but only in smaller stores. When I go to big stores, I have to have a list and stick to it, or I'll do exactly as the OP describes. I won't get out of the store for hours. So I keep a running list and shop once per week. I have certain staples (tomatoes, soups, etc.) that I maintain on hand and put them back on the list whenever I use them.

Lately I have shopped at larger stores more often because it's hard to justify the extra cost of smaller stores. But I think that it's important to bear overabundance of choice in mind. There's a cost/benefit analysis to make. I can imagine that for some of the most inattentive/depressive prone folks on this board (even some lower-income folks), it may make sense to go to smaller stores sometimes because of the lower risk of overwhelm. It's a very real psychological problem.

oh I hate grocery shopping too! - but not as much as I used to. Before, not only would it be really upsetting but I felt so stupid, being upset from such a regular chore.
it freaks me out to spend all that money every week (at one time we were didn't have much money at all); so I will quibble over prices in pastas or whatever and then buy expensive cookies and then feel bad about it *sigh*

i get overwhelmed when shopping because of the amount of people around and the amount of choices there are...i can't take it. i end up shopping after midnight at walmart for groceries and sometimes for clothes, which i always regret bc once you wash them, they almost always shrink, even after washing cold and hanging to dry. plus they fade. i always make a list for groceries and stick to it bc when i don't, i spend too much and don't get the things i need.

i can't afford to buy things that aren't on sale from more quality stores, but if i shop only bargains i usually end up with something i dont even like, but bought bc it was cheap and sort of what i was looking for.

mad mike, i wish i would get nominated for "What Not to Wear," i love that show, but i don't have the means to put their rules into practice. i wish i could throw all my clothes away and start from scratch, but it's not practical.

sandy4957, i like the way you shop, but i would be worried so spend so much money bc my weight fluctuates so much.

i just need to get my bf to nominate me for "What Not to Wear," i guess, lol.

sometimes i dont eat just cause i dont wanna go do my groceries loool, instead i just sleep.

Yeah, I hear you about not spending too much, Sheneeds, and I don't want to minimize that. My point is just that avoiding chronic overwhelm has value that has to be weighed in the cost/benefit analysis.

sometimes i dont eat just cause i dont wanna go do my groceries loool, instead i just sleep.


haha ive sooo been there:D

madmike i can totally relate to your wife! im so scared to spend any money as well... and it seems like i have to see every store and every possibility before commiting... and that could and does take forever! youre awesome for helping her out... my hubby gets impatient, and avoids "shopping" with me. hehe
oh and congrats to you wife for actually buying all that stuff! sounds like your setup works... might give it a try :) thanks for sharing!

I'm somewhat embarrassed to admit this, but quite a few years ago I went and saw an image & colour consultant. It was great: I learned all the colours that suited me, as well as the styles of clothing that suit my body type. I also have a basic understanding of the rules. I'm not perfect though: I got called up on mixing strips and patterns by a GF. :p

Nowadays I can recognise an article of clothing that is going to suit me. Now that I know what to look for, I can ignore all the noise, and see only what suits me.

I now have slightly more confidence when it comes to clothes shopping, and feel better about spending abit on quality garments.

My typical approach to clothes shopping is to occasionally browse, and if I see something on sale and I know it suits me, I buy it. If I'm out shopping on a mission: e.g., need business pants, then I usually spend the money if I need to.

I too hate shopping, I like having new things, that's never been the issue. The trouble is that I don't like the noise, the too many people, the overwhelming array of choices. I splurge shop, I don't quite know how it happens, it's usually when I'm not looking and all of a sudden I've spent 500 dollars. This may only happen once a year. When I go because I specifically need something, that can be an 8 hour nightmare. well not really because I'll usually take refuge in a book store for a couple of hours

Grocery shopping, I send my son because I look in my empty cupboards and say, ok oatmeal for dinner rather than go shopping. He loves grocery shopping.


I definitely save over the bargain hunters because what I buy usually is in a fairly classic style and I can wear it for several years.

Funny this should come up- I went to the local mall yesterday and forgot my Dex. Now I had enjoed a few trips shopping since hitting the medications - but they ran out about 15 minutes in. The noise- the choices- the echoes- the screaming kids. It was all too much. It was like the image of hell. I walked home leaving the rest of the family. It took an hour and a half and I got sunburnt- but it was much nicer.

Devo said it all years ago.
"Freedom of choice,
Thats what you've got.
Freedom of choice'
That's what you want.

I remember when I was about 12 years old, my Aunt took me shopping. I was thrilled, and felt so grown up! :p She told me while we were there that she found shopping to be stressful and hated it. I was surprised at that. I appreciated that she would do something that made her so uncomfortable just to see me happy. But I just couldn't see how someone would not like shopping! :confused:

Fast forward to now...

Now when I go shopping, I have to make all of the decisions and look at things and figure out where to go next and deal with the people and the noise and worry about how much I am spending and is this a good enough deal .... :eek:

I totally understand why she hates shopping! I was at the grocery last week and as I was waiting in line, I stopped for a moment and looked around me. I realized how overwhelming it all was for me. It felt good to realize that even though most people enjoy shopping, there are overwhelmed people like me all over the world.

Mike described to you my shopping trip yesterday. It actually was fun for me!! He gave me a pep talk before I went. Something that helped me the most was my determination to not look at everything. Usually my drive to find the best deal possible fills me with frustration. This time I didn't worry about that "best deal" getting away from me. Like Mike said, I usually come home empty handed. This time I just focused on finding what I liked. I had a plan and that helped out tremendously.

I am interested to see if I can make that translate into grocery shopping. Although I will NEVER like shopping for groceries! :p

Grocery shopping is actually quite easy for me as I live in Japan and so am fairly functionally illiterate. I generally buy the same brands all the time (generally ones with pictures showing what it is)...and will quickly scan the specials for anything I might need. Things like milk - I just choose the cheapest of the kind I want. Because I just automatically ignore most of the packing and information...I just focus on getting the item.
I also buy my bread from a bakery and get EXACTLY the same kind every time - I just have to decide how thin I want it sliced.

I have to admit going shopping when I was back in Australia was just so overwhelming - just far too many choices.

I am not sure how you can make this work for you. I guess the trick is to ignore most of the advertising (and not read the packets very closely)and to act like it is a mission to get in and out and get as many things as you can in the time.

Ugh! I can totally relate! I go to the mall because I NEED to for something, or my son needs something, otherwise, it's too overwhelming just getting in the mall after finding the right place to turn in, all the traffic, the parking lots, people everywhere, soooo much to take in and try to process, and I know I can't take it all in and end up seeing and taking in very few cues. Then, in the mall......visually noisy, to use Driver's word. When I need stuff, I usually check out my quiet, friendly, neighborhood Goodwill, and I can find a bunch of a variety of clothes or stuff at prices I am more than willing to pay. And jeans that cover my privates.....

Today, I had to go find a place to get new eyewear. Geeeesh. Frames everywhere, so many I can't see one of them. So many stores to check out for the best frames, prices, and special lenses my ophth. recommended. Finally, at EyeMasters, the nice lady took the like 20 frames I had bundled in my hands and meticulously critiqued each one on my face and for the lenses. She deserved a tip for putting up with me. But yeah, the whole deal very frustrating, difficult, and overwhelming, and I'd just rather not go. IF somebody gave me 200.00 to spend, I'd come home with nothing after a day of "shopping" too!

This is one reason I like Costco, there is limited choice within types of items and what they do have is usually good. There are a few things where they have more of a kind of thing than I want to process, so I just avoid those things, wines and cheeses mostly. Actually I just focus on the two kinds of cheese I get and get those.

I just wear my clothes to rags and don't worry about them too much.

I do like a nice big bookstore though, books I can handle for some reason.

Stores are like libraries to me... I have to wander around and check out all the isles.

There have been some occasions when I made a list and just got those things, but the dominant method is to go in needing one item and spend an hour or so just wandering around checking out everything.

Hardware stores are especially difficult for me because as I walk around looking at stuff I don't need, I think of things I can do with them.
I may see an item in the electrical department, for example, and think to myself "Hmm, I could take that, strip off the cover, wrap it around a ____ over in the nuts&bolts dept, connect that to a something-or-other and I'd have this widget that could _____!".

I have to say though, that sometimes this does come in handy.
I'll see some item and remember that buried away somewhere at home is an object that quit working and I kept it incase I could ever fix it.
Now I see something that I can use to make it work again!... well, sometimes make it work again... :p

Sometimes I wander around stores because I forgot my list or just forgot what I was trying to remember on the way over that I needed to get.
I hope that by walking all over the store, I'll see it and remember or see something that reminds me of it.

My former wife hated sending me to the store.
Sometimes I'd literally be gone for hours!
If it was something she needed fairly quickly, say for dinner, she'd be p*i*s*s*e*d because I wouldn't come back for an hour or more and dinner was waiting around to be finished whenever I brought back the special ingredient.

Sometimes I can get overwhelmed shopping also.
Especially with things like clothing, or when buying presents for people if I don't have just one thing I know I want to get them.

It's gotten especially bad since I've been blending genders... I really don't know how you women can figure out what size things really are and what colors or styles go with other clothing in different colors or styles.
Haha.... that's the one thing about living in the male gender role that is really easy... clothes shopping.
It was especially easy when I was still married... I let my wife pick out all my clothing.
The most I could do was t-shirts and jeans.:D

Shopping is SO difficult for me. I mean... I love clothes. I love looking cute and dressing up. But when I get to the mall, or even to the grocery story. It's like... my goodness. Even if I had ideas in my head, I am never gonna find exactly what I want. Lot of times I'll even look on the internet at the website of where I'm going and I'll find things I think are cute. Then when I get there, the stuff I want isn't there!

With clothes shopping, I just have to force myself to look at a few things and try them on. Whatever catches my eye first... just get it in my size and try it on. Usually this works out pretty well for me. I've been able to get more clothes this way. Fortunately it's gotten a lot easier since I've lost weight. Things that I do like I don't end up getting all ****ed off in the dressing room and being unable to shop. Sometimes... but less frequently.

Grocery shopping is hard too. I'll go to the store w/ friends or my mom and they'll be like "ok... what do you want?" and I'll be like... "i want... good food" or "i want stuff to make like, lunches..." and it will be like, okay... well... what exactly is that. and I'll wander around and not really know. Even if I've sorta made a list in my head, or even on paper ahead of time! I think it has to do w/ me being sorta picky and not really enjoying a lot of food, and not really ever being motivated to actually make food... But at the same time I dont want to eat food from the freezer. :( Plus even if I was willing to spend time and cook (and I do love to cook! ... for other people) I wouldn't know WHAT to cook, cas I basically never have an appetite for anything (this is before meds too mind you).

My mom got really frusterated over break and was just like "do you like ANYTHING?!" and i was like"... um... squash, yams, peanut m&ms, chinese style chicken, sticky rice..." she got frustrated. ended up buyinatg me chicken and rice, but ya can't do that every day and I can only eat it about every 2 weeks or so anyway, then I have no appetite for it either. Thats the benefit of eating @ school, I am hungry and I have to choose from whats available. Although I never finish anything, so I get a bunch of random stuff to try and taste and... well I get quite a variety anyway.

Sorry, went off on bit of a tangent, but shopping IS frusterating. I try to do as much as possible online... although can't do that w/ groceries and that scares me with clothes (sizes are always weird).

Ok, that's enough from chatterbox now... good luck with your shopping everyone!

WOW! Talk about great timing. My wife and I just went through this yesterday. She needs some new clothes, and I wanted her to go get some. We were both raised somewhat with little means financially, and she is still very cheap when it comes to buying things. She goes straight for clearance and the search for the biggest, greatest deal on some cheap item and need to look at everything overwhelms her and she comes home frustrated, with nothing. So, yesterday, I gave her a couple hundred dollars to go get some things with. Before, she would never think of spending $20 on a single shirt, she had to get one for $10 or less, which just isn't always realistic. She would spend time looking at the $40 shirts and wanting them, but never thought she could have them. I said "why not"? If you have the money to do it, and you want the $40 shirt, buy it.

Have you ever watched "What Not To Wear" on TLC? They give the people that can't shop for clothes rules to follow, structure to make them go for what they should be buying and wearing. That's what I did yesterday for my wife. I told her to NOT shop the clearance whatsoever, and that if she just had to, to limit herself to 10 minutes. If she couldn't find that great buy in 10 minutes, and time is money, then she might as well buy the more expensive items.

I also gave her price ranges. I told her that I wanted her to spend x amount for a pair of pants, jeans, shirts, a belt, etc. I showed her that she could spend more than she thought on each item and still get what she needed.

I also told her that there is ALWAYS a better deal out there, or a shirt that you would like better. However, that is battle you can't win. Instead, go in with a plan, saying that you are going to buy this this this and this. Then set a realistic, not cheap,price that you can pay for each item, and go directly to the area of the store that is in that price range. Find the item that fits you that you like and buy it. If you like it and it fits, you are done. You don't have to go keep looking for something better, because by doing so you only overwhelm yourself and end up frustrated, and coming home with nothing because you get so frustrated.

The end result? She spend about $230 yesterday and got like 14 different items, from pants to belts to shirts and more! She went to JC Penney's and Dillards, and they have just about everything on sale after Christmas. She got stuff on sale without having to shop for the best deal, because pretty much everything was on sale anyway. But the biggest deal is that she had FUN shopping, because the pressure was off. Go, find one item that fits the price range and type of item you want, and that you like, and then buy it and be done. Sure, she may have missed some deal or maybe even something she might have liked a tiny bit more, but who cares? She came home happy, with bags full of items, and what more can you ask.

Yes, I'm a guy, and yes, I told my wife how to shop. I'm a weird one, and I realize that, lol.

Wow, here I was thinking I do pretty well except for big-ticket items like a new stove or a new car... but you could have been describing me when you described how your wife shops for clothes. I buy as many of mine as I can at yard sales and thrift shops - and it's only been in the last few years that I was able to stop myself from buying something just because it fit even if it was a color or style that I knew I probably wouldn't wear.

I finally splurged on some more expensive bras a few years ago and can't believe the difference in comfort. I bought enough for each day of the week, but by now they are starting to wear out and I can't find that style anymore, so I'm back to having to try several different ones and compare to find the best - and I'm dreading it and putting if off.

I remember when I was about 12 years old, my Aunt took me shopping. I was thrilled, and felt so grown up! :p She told me while we were there that she found shopping to be stressful and hated it. I was surprised at that. I appreciated that she would do something that made her so uncomfortable just to see me happy. But I just couldn't see how someone would not like shopping! :confused:

Fast forward to now...

Now when I go shopping, I have to make all of the decisions and look at things and figure out where to go next and deal with the people and the noise and worry about how much I am spending and is this a good enough deal .... :eek:

I totally understand why she hates shopping! I was at the grocery last week and as I was waiting in line, I stopped for a moment and looked around me. I realized how overwhelming it all was for me. It felt good to realize that even though most people enjoy shopping, there are overwhelmed people like me all over the world.

Mike described to you my shopping trip yesterday. It actually was fun for me!! He gave me a pep talk before I went. Something that helped me the most was my determination to not look at everything. Usually my drive to find the best deal possible fills me with frustration. This time I didn't worry about that "best deal" getting away from me. Like Mike said, I usually come home empty handed. This time I just focused on finding what I liked. I had a plan and that helped out tremendously.

I am interested to see if I can make that translate into grocery shopping. Although I will NEVER like shopping for groceries! :p

Hmm, maybe that's why I prefer shopping at Aldi's most of the time. They have already done all the comparison and picked the best items for the money - sometimes there will a choice between two brands but it's usually just a choice of which cereal to buy. And I love being able to bag my own groceries so I can use my cloth bags and pack the cold stuff together, the bread and chips together so they don't get squashed. It's a lot less stressful shopping there.

I hate clothes shopping, but I like having nice clothes.

So I suck it up and go and find ONE outfit that I like -- then buy the same thing in different colors.

Also stick to a similar color palette for everything you buy, that way everything goes with everything else.

Set some "rules" -- "I will only buy pants in black or khaki" so you don't end up with really cool orange pants that go with nothing. I also pretty much only buy solid colors. that way I can just grab the first 2 things I find each morning and look somewhat coordinated.

I finally splurged on some more expensive bras a few years ago and can't believe the difference in comfort. I bought enough for each day of the week, but by now they are starting to wear out and I can't find that style anymore, so I'm back to having to try several different ones and compare to find the best - and I'm dreading it and putting if off.


Ugh, I'm going through that myself right now. I've tried Victoria's Secret, Frederick's (which is what my mother swears by), Macy's, JC Penney, even Walmart. :P Most of the bras I have start to rub me raw under my arm by about 4 pm and it drives me nuts. I'm walking around just adjusting my bra, pulling it this way, tugging it that way, repositioning the straps, etc... I've got to find a good place to get some new ones soon though, as I am actually starting to scar from being rubbed every day in the same place. Lol.


I just can't go shopping with anyone who wants to spend money! I like things. I like LOTS of things. Jewelry here, new something or the other there, etc. I always end up hemming and hawing and buying something uncomfortable because I'm so tired of trying on clothes after the first go 'round. Maybe I should adopt the philosophy of 'buy quality not quantity' so that I have less excuses to be at the mall...

Ugh, I'm going through that myself right now. I've tried Victoria's Secret, Frederick's (which is what my mother swears by), Macy's, JC Penney, even Walmart. :P Most of the bras I have start to rub me raw under my arm by about 4 pm and it drives me nuts. I'm walking around just adjusting my bra, pulling it this way, tugging it that way, repositioning the straps, etc... I've got to find a good place to get some new ones soon though, as I am actually starting to scar from being rubbed every day in the same place. Lol.


I just can't go shopping with anyone who wants to spend money! I like things. I like LOTS of things. Jewelry here, new something or the other there, etc. I always end up hemming and hawing and buying something uncomfortable because I'm so tired of trying on clothes after the first go 'round. Maybe I should adopt the philosophy of 'buy quality not quantity' so that I have less excuses to be at the mall...

Good luck with your shopping. I still haven't gone looking. I can only wear cotton bras - you know, the stretch cotton kind. Anything else rubs me raw too, and ends up smelling funky as well. I think I bought the last ones at K-Mart, but maybe it was WalMart. They're JustMySize and cost less than $15 apiece. Trouble with buying them online is I can't tell whether they are all cotton or not.

I'd wear stretch cotton but I'm a D-cup and it hurts the girls. :P I tried going to Macy's, JC Penney's, and Belk today-no Nordstroms around here, which I hear carries some good stuff. :P It's a trip into Raleigh for me-which will probably end up being a 45 minute drive to get a consult at a custom bra place, which is expensive. Hopefully they can at least give me some ideas on what's causing the problem.

Really? I'm between a C and D and old enough that the natural support is long gone and was so thrilled when I could stop wearing UNnatural fibers. I've never been able to wear an underwire and don't understand why anyone would put themselves through that kind of discomfort - that and pointy toe shoes - ERGH!

I'm stumped over the pointy shoes things as well, but I'm so used to my boobs looking roundish that now if I don't have at least an underwire, they look weird under my shirt to me. o.0

Tried Macy's, Belk, and JC Penney's last night, no dice. Going to have to make a trip into Raleigh to see if the custom bra people there can figure out what the heck's going on. :P

bras and shoes and stuff....i'm in the wrong thread.:)

bras and shoes and stuff....i'm in the wrong thread.:)

Well, this is the women's section, but if you hate shopping for bras and high heels go ahead and jump in here. http://www.addforums.com/forums/images/icons/icon14.gif

Well, this is the women's section, but if you hate shopping for bras and high heels go ahead and jump in here. http://www.addforums.com/forums/images/icons/icon14.gif

I don't shop for high heels.....they dig in to my ankles :D

This is why the gods invented the internet and online shopping. :)

This is how I do about 80% of my shopping. Lots of sites have free shipping, and there are other sites like retailmenot.com and currentcodes.com that have codes for free shipping or 10% off or whatever.

Yes, it's true with clothes you can't try them on, but if you generally know your size at one store that doesn't change. And shoes - the site zappos.com has free shipping both ways, so if it doesn't fit, send it back for free!

I despise stores. I despise driving to them, fighting for parking spaces, bumping into people, crying kids, running kids, just the general overall chatter and noise that's in a mall. And half the time my impatient ADHD self is too much in a hurry to take the time to try things on in the store...it takes too much time!

So anyway, yeah. The internet is a great thing :)

I love the mall (well some of them anyway) - but if it's a good mall, I have trouble shopping because I'm just wandering & looking at people & all of the stuff. I don't like to buy stuff online, I have to touch it first.

Same here. Plus I don't shop often enough to know my clothing sizes. *blush* Just my supposed bra size and my shoe size!

And what if it isn't comfortable when you put it on?? Then you've got to pack it up and try and remember to mail it back. I'm the worst about remembering to mail stuff off.

Plus it's so darn easy to overspend on the internet!!!

Same here. Plus I don't shop often enough to know my clothing sizes. *blush* Just my supposed bra size and my shoe size!

And what if it isn't comfortable when you put it on?? Then you've got to pack it up and try and remember to mail it back. I'm the worst about remembering to mail stuff off.

Plus it's so darn easy to overspend on the internet!!!

Yeah, repacking and getting stuff to the post office can be as much of a pain as shopping. Like I said, you can't always tell from a description whether something like a bra is all cotton or just the cups are cotton, and when your skin is as sensitive as mine is, it simply has to be all cotton. NO nylon!

While working as a consultant I travelled to small towns a lot. When I had a bit of time on my hands I would go into the small shops and just loved them. There would only be one or two in town and I could see everything in a very short period of time. This was super compared to being overwhelmed in the city. I usually found something great and often at a great price as well.

I feel exactly the same way! I get overwhelmed, can't make choices, etc. I also can't put things together. I wish they had Garanimals for adults! I buy Cabi, which is Carol Anderson by Invitation. They're home parties and there's a limited selection and pieces can go together in a variety of ways, so there's no wrong way to wear them. And the salespeople are very helpful.

OMG! If I go into a store like SPENCERS GIFTS or some kinda whacky store with stuff from the floor to the ceiling...ugggg...you might as well take my head off and throw it down the bowling lane cause I cannot handle!

I feel exactly the same way! I get overwhelmed, can't make choices, etc. I also can't put things together. I wish they had Garanimals for adults! I buy Cabi, which is Carol Anderson by Invitation. They're home parties and there's a limited selection and pieces can go together in a variety of ways, so there's no wrong way to wear them. And the salespeople are very helpful.

I put together Garanimals for my extremely left brained partner. If I don't he leaves the house looking rather odd.

mADD Mike- what you did for your wife rocks. Actually, my best success clothing shopping I had set similar parameters for myself, eg.: you WILL spend this $200 today on some business casual clothes. I did that a couple times back when I had a corporate job, and many, many years later I actually still have some of those items. They were good enough to look fine at somewhat varying weights, styles, etc.

All shopping- the environment makes a huge difference to me. A grocery store that feels to expansive can exhaust me. I HAVE abandoned a cart and gone home on the odd super awful ADD day when I couldn't find my own navel let alone decide which cold cuts to buy. I don't buy for sales etc when it comes to food; I tend to go with the stoers I know I can handle, and that I know enough to find things in,

Lately I buy a lot of clothes at Costco and at TJMAXX for a few reasons. They have generous return policies, so I can come back w/ something months later (since it takes a while to get around to it)- if I just get store credit, I know I'll use it. But it's also, expecially at TJMaxx, the store layout. I just go to 'pants' and look through all the pants in my size. I don't have to go from section to section to find an item, like you do in a department store. That works for me, especially as I never know which pants will fit well! (I also like thrift stores, partly for the same reasons.)
Though I have to admit, I haven't bought much lately because I don't bother if I don't have the energy.

On occassion I've listened to music on headphones while shopping, that can help.
And, for clothes... I go with my husband. He's a good judge of style and doesn't have all the body image issues many of my friends seemed to. (Like when they don't want to hear that you need a smaller size so you need new pants!)

On the bra issue-
That IS something I've shopped for online. I order a bunch of sizes/variations, and then return what doesn't fit. There are online stores that are really helpful in their customer service chat/phone and have better selection, etc. You DO have to make it to the post office to return the ones that don't fit, though!

MY GOD! lol I'm so glad someone posted about this, it drives me and my partner insane. I'm terrible, and like most have said on here I can walk round a shop about ten times looking at the same thing and then eventually leave with nothing, i'm sure they must think i'm a shop lifter...

I can really only go shopping when I know what I want and when i've thought about it for about 2 hours+ before hand. Food shopping is dreadful and ends up in me leaving without any food because I just can't decide what I want on the spot, I end up looking at everything and then seeing something at the end of an isle which sets me off wondering if I should get something or not. Those end of isle things should be BANNED for people like me :(

EDIT: OOOPS Sorry I just saw this was the girls area :o/

On the bra issue-
That IS something I've shopped for online. I order a bunch of sizes/variations, and then return what doesn't fit. There are online stores that are really helpful in their customer service chat/phone and have better selection, etc. You DO have to make it to the post office to return the ones that don't fit, though!

I believe I could manage to return the ones that don't fit - and it would be sooooooo much less stressful to be able to try them on at home and see how they look under different clothes. Would you mind sending me a PM of the online shops you've found have best selection and return policies?

Thanks!

Have a real hard time with choices in supermarket......too many products. It takes me very long to read through choices, figure out if I do or don't have a coupon I think I clipped last week in my very large coupon organizer.....which organizes nothing cause I've pulled out the plastic separators, having needed them for other things (wiping ice off windshield, cleaning dog poop off heel)

For others overwhelmed by choices, here's a feel-good book. It makes a case that we're really the wise ones;)

The Paradox of Choice: Why Less is More
How the Culture of Abundance Robs us of Satisfaction
By Barry Schwarz

Am embarassed :o to tell family the amount of time I take to buy 4-5 days of food, for just 3 humans and puppy. So I say before I leave...back in 3 hours, going to food shop, get gas, to drug store, to dry cleaner. I don't make it to the other stores 'cause if I do it'll be 6 hours instead of 4. (3 was never gonna happen.)

Work clothes are much easier. I wear suits because they're like uniforms.
And only need occasional cleaning. Separates, specifically the task of mixing and matching, makes me twitch. Big sales and shopping the week before Xmas, sale or not, isn't a possibility. Am great at last minute Xmas shopping, though.....4 hours in the supermarket is enough to buy everyone gift cards:p!

does anyone else have trouble shopping?? i need new clothes but i CANT shop. i literally have clothes from years ago because i get so overhelmed by clothing stores and cant commit to anything!! i WANT to shop and i try and go but i end up wandering for hours and come back emptynhanded and frustrated. With food shopping or any household stuff i take FOREVER because i need to look at EVERYTHING, every brand, every price, compare everything. it takes me so long to pick out one product. anyone else have the same problem???? :confused:
yes, yes, yes, There are so many times I come home from running "errands" my dh doesnt understand how I can take so long and come home with nothing. I hate shopping of any kind. for so many reasons.

Have a real hard time with choices in supermarket......too many products. It takes me very long to read through choices, figure out if I do or don't have a coupon I think I clipped last week in my very large coupon organizer.....which organizes nothing cause I've pulled out the plastic separators, having needed them for other things (wiping ice off windshield, cleaning dog poop off heel)

For others overwhelmed by choices, here's a feel-good book. It makes a case that we're really the wise ones;)

The Paradox of Choice: Why Less is More
How the Culture of Abundance Robs us of Satisfaction
By Barry Schwarz

Am embarassed :o to tell family the amount of time I take to buy 4-5 days of food, for just 3 humans and puppy. So I say before I leave...back in 3 hours, going to food shop, get gas, to drug store, to dry cleaner. I don't make it to the other stores 'cause if I do it'll be 6 hours instead of 4. (3 was never gonna happen.)

Work clothes are much easier. I wear suits because they're like uniforms.
And only need occasional cleaning. Separates, specifically the task of mixing and matching, makes me twitch. Big sales and shopping the week before Xmas, sale or not, isn't a possibility. Am great at last minute Xmas shopping, though.....4 hours in the supermarket is enough to buy everyone gift cards:p!

My favorite grocery store for getting what I need and getting out again in less than an hour is Aldi's. They've already done all the reading and comparing and making choices and picked the best choice for the money so all I have to do is decide how many cans of green beans I want - not spend 10 minutes comparing the different brands and different sizes.

Once in a while it's nice to go to the big grocery store and look around for some different ideas, but it's much more stressful if I have a list and just want to do the shopping and get on with my day.

Hate shopping. Even as a child I became a whiny,irritated mess...this has definitely carried on into adulthood.

I get hot and sweaty (so I always leave my coat in the car) and annoyed by people walking slowly...I tend to speed walk to the stores I like and rarely venture into new places.
I actually refuse to go to the huge mall in my city because it's just way too big and crowded and noisy and...horrible!! I know it's the best mall, I know I can find the best stuff there...but I really don't care. I only visit medium size malls that have a lot of parking (I despise public transit...so confusing and stressful).

I never shop at value places that force you to look through bunches of clothes .... I need mannequins and clean displays ... I don't care if it costs more!

I also avoid shopping because I usually over-spend...if I find 3 things at a store and know I can only afford 1...I literally cannot decide which one I want so I just buy all 3 and deal with being broke. So in this regard, I'm happy I don't enjoy it.

Start shopping online...much easier and cheaper!

Wow, reading these posts give me the creeps. I have my 1st doc appointment next Fri., but I'm thinking more and more that I do have ADD (or I'm just a psychotic nut). I HATE shopping-clothes, groceries, furniture-whatever! I shake, sweat, feel confused & overwhelmed. I can never find what I have in mind to wear for clothes and very critical of how things look in me. X-mas shopping is always the biggest problem for me to the point I actually hate x-mas and get severly depressed.

I have unique taste in furniture and can never find what I want unless it's like a piece that's $7K! I come home defeated, exhausted and angry. I can shop at the speed of light through 15+ stores, be home in like a couple of hours with ZIPPO. And it happens over & over like a broken record-AAGGHHHH-I just want to be "normal"!

Oh my god I thought I was alone here. My brother and I were just joking about this the other day. We were in Bed Bath and Beyond to pick out curtains for the house. He knows I get weird in stores and have to "mozy". Inside I completely shut down. My eyes get huge and I have to look at just about everything. I feel totally over stimulated. I cant think clearly and although Im sooooo cheap its not funny, I am compelled to buy something.

I also hate clothes shopping. Cant stand spending the money. I hate trying on clothes and I just feel incredibly overwhelmed by the entire experience.

Food shopping is bad because I always buy too much. I go in for 5 things and come out with 10 bags full of things. If something is on sale I dont buy 1, I have to buy 3. I have at least a years worth of shampoo. What the hell is that all about. LOL

I am compelled to buy something.

I absolutely hate going shopping and walking away without anything for me.