Im so sure I have ADD and its the inattentive day dreamy type. I will tell you my story. As a child I would get into trouble at primary school and it felt like I couldnt control myself with being good. I found school work hard and I did have friends but sometimes they would tease me which I use to always get uspet about. I acted quite young for my age and have always felt like I was a dissapointment to my parents and my older sister, I always felt like I was always a pest to them and never really had a good relationship with them.

At high school I wasnt so naughty but I was quite withdrawn and was too scared to stand up to bullies, I had my own group of friends which I loved and got along with well. But my grades wasnt that great and I found it hard to try my hardest at school and do well. Later on at high school I think I developed a bit of social anxiety aswell as I felt anxious if I was invited on any social events and didnt want to go because I was scared that I will make a fool of myself and then my friends wont like me anymore.

After school I chose to go and study which wasnt much of a success as I didnt pass and always got pretty poor grades with some tutors not even giving me a chance before the exams.

I then went onto full time employment which I am constantly striving for approval with my boss and management I just wnat them to think Im great and a great worker but I feel like I am always screwing up. I try my hardest to do my best but something little like I forget to do things really gets to me. I am really emotional and get upset really easily and any kind of critisism tends to break me instead of make me a better worker. I want to so much be accepted by my boss. I get along well with my co workers but I hardly have any friends. I think Im a bit depressed, the pain feels rather numb though because I try not to think about it. Im sure I need some sort of counselling to find out what is actually wrong with me. I feel like Im unhappy most of the time and that I screw up, Ive been working at the same job for over a year and am too scared to ask for a pay rise because I feel as though Im not good enough for one, even though my co workers say I really need to ask for one.

Does anyone else have any of these feelings ??

sorry about the negative outlook.

Hey there....

I totally know how you feel. I was always the day dreamer type, and was always afraid of getting in trouble for not paying attention so I always just pretended I did, not really taking notes but doodling instead. I became a great artist ;) No one ever knew I day dreamed so much though. They all thought I liked school. My grades were always decent, I was really, really quiet (all of my P-T conferences were always... "Oh she does really well, she is just so quiet!" ).

As a result, I didn't have many friends either. Even when I do have a friend, sometimes I forget to call them back or I interrupt, etc. In high school, I took all music, art and theater classes because I could just live in my head the entire time. It takes me an unusually long time to really "get it". Anything, even simple instructions. I always get so discouraged because while I am obsessive about academia, I always feel like I come out second place and no higher.

I too, cannot take criticism from bosses or teachers. I will let it eat at me to the point of outrageous anxiety. That is kind of like a chain reaction though, because if I get bad criticism, I get anxious for the next time I meet with that person, and then I don't show that person I am confident in what I am doing and again get bad criticism. It is hard to break the cycle sometimes, but you have to try not to anticipate what their reaction will be.

For me, I went to therapy for anxiety issues initially. After seeing her for about 4 months (and finally getting comfortable expressing my mind completely and freely without anticipation or preparation), she suggested that I probably have ADHD. I was shocked, to be honest. I never even dreamt of that. She has also helped me manage parts of my life that I could not have otherwise.

For example, some sessions when I go to see her, I can ramble about the stupidest thing (I think) that bothers me. When the session is over, I realize that what I just learned to solve that 'small' problem I can apply that sort of thinking to other problems I have. One day I couldn't go get an oil change alone, and the next thing I know... I walked by myself, downtown, and went to a concert and even met people to hang out with! It was amazing and so fun, and one of the best things I've ever done! :)

She has given me ideas and suggestions to help with ADHD, too. She referred me to my psychiatrist, and has given me tons of resources to improving my life. At first I dreaded going but now I actually look forward to it! With the right therapist you will find that as time goes on and you give it an honest shot, that while they can give you suggestions and ideas.... you are the one in control of your personal growth.

All in all, sorry that was so long....
DONT GIVE UP! :)

hello somuchbetter

THankyou for your reply I enjoyed reading it because it made me feel like I wasnt the only one and that someone else knows where I am coming from. I am having problems at work at the moment because I am always striving to do my best and I am a hard worker but I work with one particular person who is the assistant manager and he sometimes picks on me and critisises me for anything I do or I dont do because sometimes I would forget and it just wasnt on my mind at that moment, nothing major just minor things. THis is then making me feel more anxious around him and I seemed to have lost my confidence too when I work with him.

On other days when I work with others I am fine as their is no critisism and I just get on with what I have to do if I forget to do something at that particular time I will remember to do it about 10 mins later and usually its no big deal cos at least I had done the task. I feel more relaxed and calm then.

I dont know what to do because he kind of makes me feel like a screw up when all my co workers always say that I am one of the best workers there. But what my assistant manager is giving out the impression to me is that I am a screw up and cant do anything right he is always pointing out the things we all do wrong instead of praising us on the things we do really well, the manager and bosses are like that too.

I think therapy will be a great thing for me but I just dont know how to go and arrange to have one. It also seems strange to me to say that I think I might need to see a therapist because I dont know how anyone will react to it. My parents believe Im not depressed at all as I never share my problems with them because I dont know how to talk to them like that.

THanks for your message though. I just feel like Im going crazy.