Hey guys,


I've been noticing something strange over the past few days, my mother was really upped, didn't worry about anything. She found it near amusing that I flunked a test and such. When something obviously failed, which I expected my mother to worry about, all she did was keep on being happy and not worry about a thing. It might sound healthy, but this surely doesn't sound healthy if you know my mother. She usually worries about everything. Just a few minutes ago, she asked if ritalin had withdrawal symptons, but she encased it in some context, possibly to make it seem she wasn't asking for herself. And besides that, I think, but I'm not sure, 40 to 50 mg of ritalin is missing. However, I'm now positively sure 100mg's are left, I'm personally not taking them right now.

Any idea on what I should do?

Zat

Count your pills and write the total on the bottle,and everytime you take one change the number.If your mom is taking them you will know for sure.I have had the same problem I live with an addict and I have to hide my meds but it is so much harder if it is your mom.The bonus is if the number is written on the bottle consistantly she cant deny it.I would forget my head if it wasnt screwed on so this is what I did to be sure that it wasnt just me.If she asks just tell her you think you have been losing some pills and want to make sure your not double dosing.Then when your suspicions are confirmed talk to her about it and if that doesnt work talk to your Doctor.Thats what I would do, hopefully this helps.Good Luck!

Thanks for the advice, but I'm pretty lucky, since they're not in a bottle, but in a sheet. I have a perfect full sheet left, so, if one or two goes missing, I'll definately notice, that or the entire pack.

Hopefully this is a one time deal, and she wont pull this again. But even so, her actions are not excusable. She stole your schedule II medication and ingested it. Consider this - a completely identical situation to yours plays out, except it's a co-worker or fellow student who sneaks your meds. They get caught, either by you or someone else who's on the ball, and they're risking a run in with law enforcement BIG TIME.

I strongly suggest that you count your meds daily for at least the next 2 weeks. If you're in possession of them, try to keep them in a safe place where they're not easily accessible. If they're in a general place, like a medicine cabinet in the bathroom or kitchen, removing them and putting them in a secure location is something to consider.

If you notice any pills missing, immediately confront her and ask if she knows where your missing pills are. Try to be very, very calm and understanding and open. If she feels like she's being accused or attacked, you wont get anywhere. If she admits that she has taken them, I think the next step would be to ask her why she did, and attempt to understand what her motives are. Then you can go from there and decide whether any further action is needed.

If she doesn't admit to it and/or gets defensive, at least she'll know that you're keeping track of your meds and closely watching. She'll most likely cut the crap a tthat point. If not, she may have a bigger problem and need outside help.

It sucks that you're in this situation, and I hope this is just an anomaly. :o Keep us posted, though!

re:#4

Should he "immediately confront" his mother? She could kick him out. Some parents (esp drug users) are pretty emotionally volatile and might ditch their kid for even less.

One REALLY has to "think a few steps ahead" of the worst case scenario when dealing with people.

Why not just keep your stash, stashed and keep your daily meds in your back pocket. That's what I do.

Why not just keep your stash, stashed and keep your daily meds in your back pocket. That's what I do.

I keep my meds that anyone would want to get their "hands on" with me at all times, in my bookbag and then in my bookbag under my bed if i'm sleeping, and in my pocket if i'm going out without a bookbag.

Some consider that paranoid, but that's not what I call it. When the day comes that you get back from work and notice 10 of your 80mg generic oxycontin's missing from your bottle you left on your desk, the ONLY roommate that was there when you were gone "doesn't know" anything about it with a semi glossed over smile on his face, you have to "hide your stash" so to speak.

It takes quite a bit of restraint for someone to NOT punch him straight in the face over the rage that he would lie to your face about STEALING meds belonging to you for a purpose.

re:#4

Should he "immediately confront" his mother? She could kick him out. Some parents (esp drug users) are pretty emotionally volatile and might ditch their kid for even less.

One REALLY has to "think a few steps ahead" of the worst case scenario when dealing with people.

His profile says he's 19, I'm sure he has a handle on that. He's a big boy now, let's give him the benefit of the doubt. :p


I keep my meds that anyone would want to get their "hands on" with me at all times, in my bookbag and then in my bookbag under my bed if i'm sleeping, and in my pocket if i'm going out without a bookbag.

Some consider that paranoid, but that's not what I call it. When the day comes that you get back from work and notice 10 of your 80mg generic oxycontin's missing from your bottle you left on your desk, the ONLY roommate that was there when you were gone "doesn't know" anything about it with a semi glossed over smile on his face, you have to "hide your stash" so to speak.

It takes quite a bit of restraint for someone to NOT punch him straight in the face over the rage that he would lie to your face about STEALING meds belonging to you for a purpose.

I have a very similar stance on this subject. After temporarily living with 2 heroin addicts and frequent visits from their friends, I've learned to be extremely vigilant. I've also had people steal cigarettes out of my coat pocket when I was in school(it was an alternate ed. program).

Seeing someone stop breathing and turn blue, and then having to help your friend resuscitate that person while EMS is on their way... it really motivates you to be a lot more cautious concerning potentially illicit substances.

I would confront your mother. Such behaviour should not be acceptable from a primary care giver. Count your medication and keep track. After taking it for a couple days to a week she will proboally experience a hardcore crash and be in a **** mood (not just the crash from coming down from the high, but a crash in general from accumulated lack of sleep.
If she is in denial, i would go to your doctor with your father (if you have one) or set up an apointment to see about possible medication switching. Strattera and concerta would be your best bet. Concerta is a time release version of methlyphenidate (ritalin) which is difficult and a hassle to abuse in such a way. It can still be done, but it is a deterrent.
Best wishes.

I am a mother of a teenaged daughter with adhd. Because of her diagnosis at the behest of her psychiatrist i too was tested and finally diagnosed as having adhd as well, and the genetic reason for my daughter having the disorder. All my life i struggled with just the thought that i was a lazy child/teenager that could never keep still and acted on irresponsible impulses.Poor grades, barely making it thru school, and gliding thru life as if i were born yesterday. As an adult i struggled even more with chronic worry, self doubt, severe forgetful tendencies and occasional depression. It was a challenge to make it thru my work day, learning new things extemely difficult, and concentration horribly compromised. Bring child raising into the mix and it become paramount that the add adhd (untreated and unaware they have the disorder) parent "get it together" and do the best they can the only way they can. That pressure to be a good parent in spite of issues dealt with from within, can make any parent extremely worried. With all that said, and based on the description of your mother, I'm assuming that she too might have add or adhd, and is terrified to admit to herself, her doctor or to you, therefore she takes your medication in the hope it will help her to cope with it all. It's difficult for a parent to admit they might not be the super parent they want and have to be and might be concerned for respect of others (including you) if she were to admit she might have the disorder too..believe me when i say that when my daughter's psyche suggested i get tested, a wall of denial quickly went up, and i laughed it off thinking "adhd? ha! not me, i'm an adult! impossible!" and it took me some time to finally get tested myself. It isnt easy for a mother who insists on controlling EVERYTHING in her life to admit that i might have a problem myself. so this might be what your mother is going thru too. If it's discovered that she is in fact taking your medication, try not to be cruel, rude or combative...try instead to suggest to her that she see someone to help her cope with her issues, and to get tested herself. Tell her that her treatment will be something that the two of you have in common and together the two of you can work thru it. It might be a great way to bond the two of you closer together, and help each other thru a very frustrating and confusing disorder.

good luck, and remember..try not to be so hard on your mother, she's always meant well no matter how it all seems on the surface. Support each other and love each other for who you are.

I am a mother of a teenaged daughter with adhd. Because of her diagnosis at the behest of her psychiatrist i too was tested and finally diagnosed as having adhd as well, and the genetic reason for my daughter having the disorder. All my life i struggled with just the thought that i was a lazy child/teenager that could never keep still and acted on irresponsible impulses.Poor grades, barely making it thru school, and gliding thru life as if i were born yesterday. As an adult i struggled even more with chronic worry, self doubt, severe forgetful tendencies and occasional depression. It was a challenge to make it thru my work day, learning new things extemely difficult, and concentration horribly compromised. Bring child raising into the mix and it become paramount that the add adhd (untreated and unaware they have the disorder) parent "get it together" and do the best they can the only way they can. That pressure to be a good parent in spite of issues dealt with from within, can make any parent extremely worried. With all that said, and based on the description of your mother, I'm assuming that she too might have add or adhd, and is terrified to admit to herself, her doctor or to you, therefore she takes your medication in the hope it will help her to cope with it all. It's difficult for a parent to admit they might not be the super parent they want and have to be and might be concerned for respect of others (including you) if she were to admit she might have the disorder too..believe me when i say that when my daughter's psyche suggested i get tested, a wall of denial quickly went up, and i laughed it off thinking "adhd? ha! not me, i'm an adult! impossible!" and it took me some time to finally get tested myself. It isnt easy for a mother who insists on controlling EVERYTHING in her life to admit that i might have a problem myself. so this might be what your mother is going thru too. If it's discovered that she is in fact taking your medication, try not to be cruel, rude or combative...try instead to suggest to her that she see someone to help her cope with her issues, and to get tested herself. Tell her that her treatment will be something that the two of you have in common and together the two of you can work thru it. It might be a great way to bond the two of you closer together, and help each other thru a very frustrating and confusing disorder.

good luck, and remember..try not to be so hard on your mother, she's always meant well no matter how it all seems on the surface. Support each other and love each other for who you are.

Those are all good points Bessie, but the fact that his mother was amused after he FLUNKED a test kinda made me lose sympathy for her. What kind of mother would be amused at her kid failing a test?

What kind of mother would be amused at her kid failing a test?

Perhaps a mother who ingested drugs that raise dopamine ;)

Ha, just reminds me of the song "Mother's Little Helper". Maybe she just had an off day and wanted to experiment, but you should probably hide your pills from the rest of society.

With all that said, and based on the description of your mother, I'm assuming that she too might have add or adhd, and is terrified to admit to herself, her doctor or to you, therefore she takes your medication in the hope it will help her to cope with it all.


Bessie......very interesting perspective and the genetic component really hasn't been mentioned much (if at all) in the posts I've read in my very short time here.

I can really relate to your theory because after I was told my nephew was AD/HD, I began doing some serious research on the matter. It was after reading all that information that I realized my older brother and my father before me were both classic ADD cases.

The traits were self-evident in retrospect as they were both inattentive, fidgety, constantly preoccupied, self-medicating individuals. Unfortunately for my family, they were never diagnosed as such.

My father died of lung cancer at age 67. He would have died of cirrhosis from the life-long drinking, but the cancer won the race in claiming his life. My older brother, a WONDERFULLY gentle and kind human being, found his way into the woods one day and hung himself from a tree. He was there for three weeks before his body was found.

I apologize for being morbid, but I am trying to help people realize that SO many FANTASTIC people have slipped through the cracks due to societal ignorance on the matter of ADD-ADHD. I have to firmly believe that were they both properly diagnosed, they would not have made the life choices that led to their deaths.

There is a definite genetic component to this disorder as is with most disorders. Do enough research on your own family and you will most likely see the chain. Realizing this will help you recognize it in your own children and stop the cycle before the path to self-destruction affects them.

To the originator of this thread, here is my advice:

Leave your pills laying around for a day or two. If and when you notice any are missing, sit down with your mother and say this.

"Mom, you know I love you very much and always want the best for you. I KNOW you've been taking my meds because I've been keeping count and I've noticed POSITIVE changes in your moods. I think YOU may be ADD and it's time we checked it out TOGETHER."

The important thing is to not be accusatory, but compassionate. Treat her the same way you would want to be treated....not like a criminal, but like a person in enough pain that she feels the need to escape and steal her child's medication.

There is a very good chance that her "stealing" your meds could lead to answers to HER problems that she has tried to mask over the years.

Good luck!

.

"Mom, you know I love you very much and always want the best for you. I KNOW you've been taking my meds because I've been keeping count and I've noticed POSITIVE changes in your moods. I think YOU may be ADD and it's time we checked it out TOGETHER."

The important thing is to not be accusatory, but compassionate. Treat her the same way you would want to be treated....not like a criminal, but like a person in enough pain that she feels the need to escape and steal her child's medication.


I think that taking this approach would be a great way to help your mom, and honestly, if I was in this situation, I would memorize this suggested talk and use it lol.

Beautifully put, I wish I could've seen it from this perspective off the bat. I really appreciate your whole post, because the way you explained it helped me to clearly see a different side to the situation that's really important. I guess I'm a bit jaded. :o

I can't quite articulate what it was about your post that made such an impact. But I feel ... enlightened! :p I just hope the OP finds it as helpful and informative as I did, heh.

Ahhh, this crazy brain of mine. Keeps me entertained. :cool:

Beautifully put, I wish I could've seen it from this perspective off the bat. I really appreciate your whole post, because the way you explained it helped me to clearly see a different side to the situation that's really important. I guess I'm a bit jaded.


Elegy, thank you very much for your kind words......however, I have to defer to Bessie because it was she who planted the idea in MY mind. Right up until I read her post, I was on the same "jaded" track as you. HIDE the stuff! LOL

It wasn't until I read her post that I "saw the light". I usually live by the mantra of "look outside the narrow scope of the lens" to find the whole truth and this time I didn't until I saw her post.

It just goes to show the value of member contributions on this board. There are so many wonderful perspectives and all of them are so important in helping us find our own truths.

Peace!

Elegy, thank you very much for your kind words......however, I have to defer to Bessie because it was she who planted the idea in MY mind. Right up until I read her post, I was on the same "jaded" track as you. HIDE the stuff! LOL

It wasn't until I read her post that I "saw the light". I usually live by the mantra of "look outside the narrow scope of the lens" to find the whole truth and this time I didn't until I saw her post.

It just goes to show the value of member contributions on this board. There are so many wonderful perspectives and all of them are so important in helping us find our own truths.

Peace!

Thank you to "finallyAnswered" For your kind words on my post. I'm so incredibly honored to know that I've been of any help to anyone here on this board. Experiences are meant to be shared in the hopes that others could somehow benefit. This is why i'm grateful to this board and it's members, you never know what you can learn from people that you will probably never meet in person. I know i have learned alot.

I'm concerned for the OP and how things are going. I do hope that soon an update will be posted.