View Full Version : have an ADHD diagnosis now

06-05-09, 02:29 PM I knew it was coming butt it still mkaes me sad to see that he really is ADHD. now this was just a pre test by the school phcycologist butt just looking at my DS he def has it. I should know I am ADHD.

I am releaved that now we know there are things we can try to help him with. we are going to try it without meds at first so if anyone has any sugestins we are very open. we have already started giving him diet coke every morning and he has been getting more done at school. he a still high strung butt at least he is getting more work done.

I was on ritalin for 5 years when I was DS's age so I do know the benefits butt right nowm we would like to stay away from meds. please dont tell me I am narrow minded about not putting him on meds. we are just hesatent and if we can control it without meds then we would like to try that first

06-05-09, 02:37 PM
I applaud you mom,

I never was medicated through my school years and did very well in school but it will take lots of discipline from you as parents and the school system to encourage him and get him excited about learning..I wish you all well


06-08-09, 12:11 PM
Are you giving diet coke because it has caffeine in it? That will only help your child for an hour or two. Caffeine is not recommended for ADHD very often.

06-08-09, 01:19 PM

This is and should be a major issue for parents. I would be very concerned about any parent who was not concerned about medicating their child. You should not feel in the least badly because you are not ready to put your son on medication until sure that it is the right thing to do.

There are many ways of looking at this. Here is my suggestion:

Explore all other possibilities. Once you have exhausted alternate ways of dealing with your child's ADHD then you can medicate with a clear idea that this is what is best for your child.

I have seen many cases where the milder level of symptoms (still ADHD though) were able to handled by behavioral modification methods designed for ADHD. In these cases medication could sometimes be avoided altogether or at least put off until later.

In any case, using this method, conscience is clear and you have the knowledge that if you do decide to medicate then this is what is best for the child using careful, deliberate judgment. It then is the last thing you try, not the first and not the easiest.

Having said that, medication is the most powerful tool we have for working with ADHD. It should seldom, in my opinion, be the first choice.

Just my thoughts,


06-08-09, 05:07 PM
Are you giving diet coke because it has caffeine in it? That will only help your child for an hour or two. Caffeine is not recommended for ADHD very often.

Are you giving diet coke because it has caffeine in it? That will only help your child for an hour or two. Caffeine is not recommended for ADHD very often.

This is true, caffeine doesn't last long, and probably why I drink a whole pot of coffee or more every day when I'm not on meds. On meds, I usually just have two.

I would also be concerned with the aspartame in diet soda. It is a man-made chemical and has it's own contraversy. Do your research and make informed decisions.

I don't think anyone here will fault you for wanting to keep medication on hold until you feel you have tried everything you feel might work. That's where I was a year ago with my son and it's where I am today with my daughter. I would just be cautious when you research alternatives. Make sure you know who is behind the reports and 'supporting' research... after all, natural/health supplements and homeopathy are industries too with products to sell and money to be made. (not saying anything against homeopathy as we use supplements as well as "big pharma" products).
Besides, I'm pretty sure that most parents try something to address behavioural issues before they consider ADHD or medication. I firmly believe that not every ADHD/ADD person needs medication, and if you can find a way to avoid it that's great! (Just don't start claiming that your treatment plan will work for everyone...and then sell a book in order for others to learn your "secrets" like many "experts" seem to do). ;) sorry a little rant there...

Try not to be sad about him probably being ADHD. The worst part when I came to the realization (which took quite some time for me to really accept) that two of my three children are very ADHD was thinking of how other people will treat them and likewise how they will view me. I've heard so many times that my kids just need "more discipline", etc and for a while I believed it.
I worked so hard to improve my parenting, my anxiety and depression so I could be a better parent and "fix" them, but it didn't seem to make any difference with my son at all and I felt like a complete failure as a parent. And I was a way better parent with him than when my daughters were younger, because I was doing some things "wrong" with them that I learned not to do by the time he was born.
It is relieving to know that it's not just my parenting! I definitely hate the "label" but if it allows them to get some specialized, individualized learning at school it will be worth it, because nothing breaks my heart more than knowing how bright and smart my children are, and not having the teachers see them as anything other than unmotivated and forgetful. I feel for you though, I am a little sad but also so relieved.

We just started my son on medication 2 weeks ago. We tried EVERYTHING prior to this difficult decision, and realized that we were just finally the "last resort". I have to say that I am dumbfounded and godsmacked with his results. He is on a low dose of Concerta, and I hesitate to say that he is a different kid... he's still my son, he is still 'himself', quirky and creative... but the emotional control... WoW.. he actually has some.
We still plan on having a full assessment done for him and my daughter (who is 9 and hasn't been on meds yet) just to find out more about how they learn, and to rule out (or rule in for that matter) any other factors such as OCD that seem to come up here and there.

Sorry this got long... as usual for me. I wish you luck in whatever path you choose for your son. We're all just trying to give our kids the best life we can. Crap gotta be at the school in 5 minutes!!!

06-08-09, 06:36 PM
With respect, I hear a lot of people say "try everything before you put them on meds".

Since I specialize in being indelicate, let me just say that I have yet to hear of a kid who was problematical enough to get a diagnosis actually see significant, objective and positive results from homeopathy or "supplements".

I lived through people "trying everything" and it was hell. Followed by more hell and then a side dish of hell. When the hell did not work, they pondered whether it was enough hell.

If there were other things to try that had some kind of track record of success, I would be happy to take a look, but non stimulant treatments seem to be limited to:

1. Natural and homeopathic products
2. Diet and exercise
3. Behavioral modification

#3 is going to be an ongoing situation and probably quite expensive.

I also believe that the longer a kid experiences detrimental behavior due to ADHD, the harder it is to unlearn, even if they are being effectively treated with stimulants. Those behaviors get easier and easier because they are practiced.

I am going right to the pills for my kids.

06-08-09, 11:43 PM
thank you all

yes we did go with diet because of the caffinee. butt have had others say the aspertaine can be worse then the suger so we are going to switch to regular. we just got the news so we are going to spend the summer figuring out what is the best plan. we have previusly cut out red die #40 to no avail. we limit his sugar intake already. I can send pop to school if nessesary to get him through the day.
my hesatancy in putting him on meds is the side effects and will my child be so different that I wont even recognize him.

I love my son to peices and dont want to see him change who he is because of this. he is a very loving outgoing child. he absalutly loves to help with anything dishes,laundry mop and sweep the floor. if I am doing it he wants to help. he loves to play card games with use. he just wants to be doing whatever we are doing if daddy is working on the truck then blaine is there with him if I am gardening then he wants a shovel too. would the meds change this? that is my greatest fear.

06-09-09, 12:03 PM
...would the meds change this?


I understand your hesitancy to medicate your son, but some of your beliefs about the medication are incorrect.

my hesatancy in putting him on meds is the side effects and will my child be so different that I wont even recognize him.

Your son will not be different, you will still be able to recognize him. As far as side affects, many children experience only minor or no side affects at all.

Good luck, and let us know how well the caffeine works.

06-09-09, 08:25 PM
ADHD is a proven neurobiological disorder of inhibition,self-control & working memory.

Since 1937, the research on the use of stimulants to treat ADHD supports symptomatic

improvement in over 90+% of individuals w/ ADHD.

Reference source :




06-09-09, 08:34 PM
The one thing my teen was able to tell me about being on meds is the significant difference it made in accomplishing things he struggled with.

I don't think it changed him negatively but I have another opinion about the teen hormones.

07-06-09, 06:45 AM
Hi Mamakat,

I felt sad when my son was diagnosed as well a year ago. At that time, we were managing well with some behavior modification and lots of help from me with homework. Even our neurologist said that medication did not seem warranted at that time - he was not struggling emotionally, his behaviors did not get him into any trouble at school...He required some modifications in the classroom. Then the next school year began and he started falling further behind. He ended up going through a full eval at school and was classified and placed in special services for reading/writing. There were many improvements, the special services teacher has glowing things to say about him but his reading and writing are not improving much. In her opinion, until his inattentiveness is managed even more, there probably won't be much improvement.

What was/is difficult for me is that much of his adhd is internal - he is not the kid jumping around, in and out of his seat.

My husband and I also felt we should do anything we could to avoid meds - we had read some scary things about them. We looked into diet modification but that, according to the neurologist, was not going to bring the changes that needed to happen. Plus, our son is very picky to begin with and I was frankly worried that he would not eat anything on a new diet plan.

So now we are trying medication. Day 1 was not very good, in my opinion but I know that I was probably expecting too much. I am excited at the thought of meds helping our son, though. I think it is wise to really consider medication carefully - we should make all decisions carefully when it comes to our children. I wish you and your son well.

For us, a whiteboard in the kitchen has been great. We write down the day and date and each person in our family has his/her own color marker to use for list making and whatnot. Every morning, my sons have a list of what they need to do that day. You can even put the time next to each if that is an issue. Both of my kids (one of which has adhd) love checking things off as they go. If they get all items checked without attitude and without being reminded to check the list, they get a sticker on a chart at the end of the day. 25 stickers earns them a reward.

I also use index cards that remind them of things like washing hands after using the bathroom - the cards are placed right where they need them (so the one for the bathroom is on the inside of the bathroom door). There is another by the door to the garage that says "Wait! Do you have your backpack?" Obviously, we tailor all of this for problem areas. For example, we no longer need to write "get dressed" on the whiteboard because my son is fine with doing this in a timely manner now. But he does need to be reminded to make his bed/do his daily reading/etc.

As for the caffeine/coke, I have heard that some use this when medications wear off in the afternoon. I read about a school where ADHD kids had a coffee at 2:00 every day to get them through the last hour of school. I don't know. A Diet Coke before school seems, to me, to be a very short-term fix and I probably would switch it to regular Coke to avoid artificial sweetener. I agree that the effects of the caffeine in a Coke won't last all that long anyway.

Sorry for the long post...I wish you well with your son.


07-06-09, 06:47 AM
One more thing about the meds...our doctor told us that if the medication did impact him in a way that was negative (like too quiet, lethargic, etc) then we would take him off of the medication immediately. There are lots of new and improved medications for adhd and there is bound to be at least one that will help your child.