Hi all:

I find it hard to communicate the way I want to. There are times where I totally put my foot in mouth or I can't get the right message out using the right choice of words and sentence structure. I find have very few friends or people who want to associate with me because of this communication problem. I spend more time alone with my cat. I usually very talkative and goofy at work and easy going with others. If I am quiet and say nothing, people ask what is wrong. I say there is nothing wrong but they say watch out she is in a bad mood. I try very hard to socialize with others but I am always left out. I do not choose to be left out, but to become involved. People always get the impression that I am very egotistical and or self centered. I hardly talk about myself but I try to connect on the same level about what an indivdual talks about. I hate to be misunderstood and judged. I am a very empathetic, caring and loving spirit that does not want to hurt a flee. I always put others ahead of me, no matter what it is. Sometimes I feel like a doormat and less empowered. Do you folks feel that I respond to the posts that are off the topic and not related to the thread. Please let me know how I can improve my communication style. Not asking for sympathy but some help to build my confidence in my communication and to have successful new friendships.

Love Galexica

Wish I could help. I have trouble keeping my foot out of my mouth. And work hard to listen better and not talk so much.
It sounds like you may have taken it to an aetreme, meaning you've clammed up in order to keep your foot out of your mouth?
That I haven't done.

I am thinking perhaps it's better to stick your foot in your mouth here and there than to hold back so much.

I have also learned to.. take my foot out when people let me or to make it clear what I meant even if they seem not to let me correct my blunder.

Some skills I have aqyire from listening to friends I find gracious is
to be gracious, like taking the time to tell someone how glad I am that threy visited, or are my friend, stuf like that!

Hope it gets better. I have a lot of friends and have been getting more and more included as time go on, the cool thing is they get used to me fast (my blundering) and it seems o.k to be me.

So I bet it is o.k to be you too. Sometimes we are oversensitive to things and we hurt ourselves by going to another extreme to avoid that mistake and inthat effort we invalidate ourselves, because we aren't being ourselves. Make sense?
hope so!