It was a basic orientation I guess.
Anyway, they want to test him for giftedness, they think he might be more just oppositional that ADHD, they also think that possibly his behavior has a lot to do with giftedness.
During the appointment, I was doing a lot of paperwork, he had some broken remote controll vehical he found. And dismanteled it and rewired it and got it working, that was an indication of giftedness.
He showed his oppositional side which was fortunate. It came out when she mentioned about a group that we could join in on with other kids. He got overly bent about it.

Anyway I am just seeking behavioral therapy with him for now. but I am very curious about drugs.
So next week is my appointment, I know it will take perhaps several weeks but I am going to try medication.

Huggs Janine,
I know that is a tough step to take (the meds) but I know you have agonized over it. Did you say they think it may not be add? Or did I misunderstand? WHat meds do they use for odd? My son is odd. Im glad youre doing all the right things. You're a wonderful parent

what do you do for behavoral issues.? Family therapy?

JB all I can say is hugs...we're starting to look at meds again for Dakota he's showing some extremely destructive behaviour's lately. You gotta do what You gotta do to give your son the best chance at the best life he can have and someone stop me before I really confuse people. lol

Really, Janine big hugs I know what your going thru. The choices your facing aren't easy but don't give up your way to stubborn and strong but most of all LOVING for that.

Love ya
Cherity

Thanks, I really don't know much yet. It was just an orientation into the county mental health program. It sounds like they are add oriented but I don't know.
I fear I can't go the med. direction at this time for my son eventhough I am quite sure the adhd is a part of my sons makeup. Mostly because of his father and partly because my son is young and reasonably manageable. I am planning to follow through in every option available and hope that his father can become more educated. But I know his father would freak if son was on meds.
I am going to head for the meds for myself, also as a testing grounds, if I have success it may help to open my sons fathers eyes.

Just going to take it one step at a time in order to prevent his father from reacting, kind of slowely warm him up if it becomes that meds are a reality for our son.

Thanks for the hugs, I don't have the support I'd like in physical form. My friends just stare at me. When I mention me being diagnosed. One is interested and claims she is sure she is herself add, she is nearing 60. One gave me a lecture, on her opposing viewpoint.

I get the lecture's all the time. I don't mind the lecture's what I do mind is that they are unwilling to hear clear medical evidence or my point of view. So, I've adopted a new policy...when they start the lecture if they aren't willing to hear my side then I just walk away. Communication is a two way street if they are unwilling to listen to me then why should I be willing to listen to them. *sticks tongue out* I'm a complete pain in the rump aren't I.

I do hope the meds work for you, I know what a hard time you've been having and how bad it makes you feel about yourself and you deserve to be happy and comfortable with you own self.

Life is two steps forward and one step back most the time. Luckily, it has a lovely melody and when it get's to the lowest point just remember it can only last for a lifetime.

Hugs
Cherity

Janine,
Yeah what Cherity said! Big big huggs, If you really pay attention to the people who are supportive of you, you will find you have started to have more of those people in your life.
I love you

Thanks and double thanks.
Maybe medication will help my obsessions, never knew I had any really untill Lover Boy!

Man, now I'm lost....Lover Boy? who's lover boy and why is lover boy calling you obsessive? Do I like lover boy? lol I"m so lost!!!!!!!!!

Cherity,
I am calling me obsessive because I have been in love with a fellow for 9 months or so. I think he's obsessive too. Anyway he's always backing off and comming back. And thus so am I.

My son has been a pain in the **** again. Extreme opositional.
Hmmmm he is arguing right now about his rights to whatever he wants. I warned his Father to tighten up the reins. At least he can be mentally prepared. Well at least I got him to practice.

OOOooo girl big hug's. Lexi is going thru this "that's child abuse" stage. Seem's it's abuse to ground her, take her toy's, make her sit on her bed until she can speak to me without screaming at me. Well, if that's abuse how am I supposed to discipline her? Spanking? *rolls eyes* I'm constantly reminding her that she may have access to anything she has paid for. Looks around the room hmmmmmmm well guess that leaves nothing, change the attitude princess. Kids...

Hi,
Gifted kids often have emotional adjustment problems because of their being "different" and the way their peers preceive them. They also often struggle with social competence(sizing up a social situation and then knowing how to act).

By the same token(no bmod pun inteneded), ADHD kids often have excellent eye hand/fine motor skills and excell at mechanics and/or art.(This would apply more to the Hyperactive-Impulsive and Combined types).Either way I think it probably pays to check it out. You CAN be ADHD and Gifted, altho it is not as common as some think.

To me, behavior therapy= behavior modification( or bmod as some call it).That is the ONLY type of therapy shown to work with Hyperactive-Impulsive and Combined types.Many therapists,including myself, use Family therapy as a vehicle to help teach bmod principles to parents.The more structure the better.

The absolute very best bmod book for ADHD Ive ever seen or used is The Parents Guide to Attention Deficit Disorder by McCarney & Bauer, Hawthorne Press.

I wish you and your family a lot of luck and good fortune.

Take care.
mctavish23:)

Thanks, mctavish
I am escaping to the bookstore now.
I am quite sure my son is both and with oppositional defiance thrown in to boot!

I have read that book and found so many wonderful idea's. Our children's therapist is a God send. Dakota had to be medicated while we were implementing the modification's but once they took hold and he learned how to calm himself and pay attention we were able to stop the use of meds. Lexi we started young luckily.

Originally posted by Jellybean
he had some broken remote controll vehical he found. And dismanteled it and rewired it and got it working, that was an indication of giftedness.

JB, how old is your son?

Your story reminded me of when I was 5 or 6 years old. I would take apart stuff all the time and fix it. My parents were amazed.
They talk about it to this day. (40 years later!).
My only memory of this is dismantling a few alarm clocks on the front porch one day and fixing all of them when I was 6. These were the wind up mechanical kind.
Long story short I'm, now, one of those Guys who can fix anything. I have a friend who says "Paul can fix anything but a broken heart and the crack of dawn". I'm working on those!
Anyway, since this is not about me.... the point is that I would suggest focusing on your childs ability to do these "gifted" things and use this as an outlet for the oppositional side. Boredom creates some fairly intense angst in folks like us, "the gifted". (They called me that as a kid too).

Here is an idea. Get him his own set of hand tools and start picking broken stuff out of other peoples trash on trash day. It's amazing what people throw away these days and he will have a blast tinkering. And the worst case is that you toss it out when he's done.
One more thing, drugs will always help but it's a trade off. If you are willing to curtail a lot of the giftedness to help deal with the rest then drugs will help a lot.
Holy crud, another thing is that my 5 year old son exhibits some of the same traits. He has been in Montessori school for 18 months and has calmed down quite a bit. However, if we have a 4 day weekend or he is out of school for any length of time he starts turning into a little monster. We have recognized his need for mental stimulation and we have all sorts of MENTAL activities that he can do when he is home.
You need to find your son's buttons for mental stimulation and start pushing them..... and it will take a lot of trial and error...but you'll look back and think...... wow!






I'm glad that is over! :D