Hi All,

Just went to the doctors yesterday for my daughter's second visit. The last visit we will get a final diagnosis, but it is definitely pointing toward ADD. I have to admit I was and still am hoping she doesn't have it. I am kind of down right now knowing that she probably has it.

My daughter did pretty well with the testing that's been done so far but did display some impulsiveness when we told her we wanted to go to a place to eat near the doctors office that she was unfamiliar with. She is a very picky eater and got upset because she was hungery and afraid there wouldn't be anything she liked.

The doctor observed the behavior and pointed out that that is a characterstic of the ADD. I told him I want to do this without meds if she does have it as she does not seem to have severe problems or low grades at school. He said he thinks we can do that but we need to finish the testing before we make any final decisions. He also observed that she is already thin and can not afford to lose any weight. I also told him she is migraine prone due to heredity. She is basically not a good candidate for meds in any way.

I talked to her on the way home and told her we'd all have to work together to help her work with her impulsiveness and lack of focus when she isn't interested in something. What I'm wondering is if we can do this ourselves or a coach would be better. I'd like to do it ourselves because I'm sure a coach costs a fortune which we don't have and I don't think our insurance would pay for something like that.

Is doing this ourselves possible? I was just wondering if anyone else has taken this route. I know it will not be easy but I am willing to give up everything and take the time to help her learn techniques to work around her impulsiveness and focus problems. We will know for sure if she has it and the degree after our next visit in June. It seemed like forever but we will finally have some answers

I do have questions about telling the school and getting the right teachers for her. I guess the doctor will be able to help me with that but any input from you all here is really appreciated. Once again, sorry for the long post. I know this drives some people crazy, but I did try to keep it in paragraphs. Thanks always for your advice and time. Have a great Sunday. Dee

Coaching is a normal parenting technique for any child, ADD or not. Non-ADD kids might be able to get by without it but ADD kids require it to succeed. You may be able to arrange someone at school for her to meet with for 10 min/day also and that should help a lot as well. If she is very oppositional, that could be more difficult.

That's great you are getting this careful diagnosis, I'll be having my second diag. session thursday. I'm much more of a mess to sort out possible causes ranging from emotional issues, depression, drinking, etc. I'm working hard to figure it out though.

I love that you will be getting an explanation of the degree of impact not simply a yeah/neah. I want to know that also. It's quite possible my diagnosis will be negative but with significant ADD components.

Hi Paul,

Thanks for the reply. Actually I really am not sure how exact a diagnosis we will get, but I imagine with every diagnosis they can tell if it's severe or slight. I'm pretty sure she is workable without meds. She really isn't what I'd call oppositional. She's just a bit stubborn in the mornings when it's time to get up.

Most kids can be stubborn at times at this age and are developing their own identity. For my daughter, so far, it just seems to be the normal transitional struggle for children of middle school age ADD or not as they mature. We've talked and she knows she's going to have some work cut out for her but that she has our support 100% and we will be working with her. I think she will be pretty cooperative.

After my daughter's final diagnosis on the 5th I'll be dealing with the school and what will have to be done there. I just don't want her in some Special Ed class. That wouldn't be fair because she is extremely bright and ahead of a lot of the kids in her grade. She just has some bugs we have to work out and I'm hoping the school will give her the right teachers and the help she needs.

My daughter starts Middle school in Sept. and it will all be so new for her. Gosh I'm nervous about that. I think more nervous then her.

Anyway, sorry to be long winded. Thanks again for the reply. Good luck with your own diagnosis too. Please keep everyone here updated on your progress. Dee