Have to apologize for all my long winded posts of late...

I've been READING again. :-)



I can't help getting enthusiastic about some things. Especially when they are so damn fascinating! Some of the things I read just plain irritate me or anger me. There are so many things I want to change in the world. I can't change the world though. Certainly not from here. ;-). So, I'll stop indundating you all with long winded posts discussing some small point and ending up on some long aside I've been reminded of by the conversation.

Hey Krisp,

You were right I reversed the land mark 3-D map thing with men and women. It was in the errata put out in a later copy of the initial book I read it in. Weird huh? :-) Also came across it again in several other places correctly. Good call lady. ;-)

Also confused the heritability thing on intelligence a little. Heritability for general intelligence is high. Over the life cycle it approaches 100%, some of the quirkier aspects don't appear to be. An einstein clone, for example, would probably be quite intelligent, have learning disabilities and many of the same personality traits, but he would not, of necessity, be a genius in the manner of the original. It was this second statement that threw me off. Oh, and it turns out Nurture is a bad word to use in the 50/50 over all mix. Parents have very little direct impact on personalities beyond genetic. Environmental influences turn out to be primarily from peer groups. Something that has been looked at as a "problem" of modern day cares and the root of child behavioral "issues" turns out to be a natural human tendency. Who knew?!

Sometimes it isn't confusion, it's having too good a memory for a typo and other times it's misunderstanding a concept until it has "sunk in" all the way. Alot of times it's just having my mind so occupied with one of my "Crusades" against "whatever" that some corner of my mind is always thinking about it. The subject matter I am so passionate about is so broad it can quite literally intrude itself into just about anything, and as you have seen of late, it often does just that. :-) I'm sorry. I do mean well.

You folks have been very tolerant of my... "foibles". In fact, you have actually been quite supportive in general, so "indulgent" would be a better word. :-) It's nice to be somewhere where the best I can hope for isn't to be grudgingly tolerated.

So, I won't be changing the world today. However, I have my passion and my anger at the injustices of the world. I have my ADD energy and enthusiasm and right now, unfortunately, I have my hands full... So, I content myself with armchair commentary. It won't always be so though. Maybe one day I will be able to put my present burdens aside and through a cape on.

BEWARE EVIL DOERS! E-BOY IS COMING TO BRING THE LIGHT OF COMMON SENSE TO THE PUBLIC DISCOURSE AND LIBERATE THE FRAZZLED SOCCER MOMS FROM THE TYRANNY OF "PARENTING EXPERTS"; PROTECT THE WEARY CITIZENS FROM "SOCIAL ENGINEERS" WHO WOULD PLAY, "PLAYDOUGH" WITH THEIR VERY SPIRITS AND DRIVE THEM INTO A SENSE OF AESTHETIC NUMBNESS WITHOUT GARDENS, TOWN SQUARES, OR NEEDS FOR BEAUTY OR LOVE; AND DELIVER THE ACEDEMICS FROM PERSECUTION FOR DARING TO ASK QUESTIONS, EVEN ONES SOME PEOPLE HAVE A VESTED INTEREST IN KEEPING UNASKED!

IF I CANNOT MANAGE TO BRING THAT LIGHT OR ACCOMPLISH ANY OF THE ABOVE.... DO NOT GLOAT EVIL DOERS! FOR I SHALL COME FOR YOU ANYWAY AND WAVE MY HINEY AT YOU AND SAY HORRIBLE THINGS ABOUT YOUR MOTHERS! :-p

I would be willing to bet that you are changing more than you realize. You may not be able to change the whole world but you can sure change a small part of it. All you can do is keep on standing up for what you believe is right.

You made me think of the sig line a friend uses:

Unless someone like you cares a whole awful lot,
Things aren't going to get better, they're not!
* Dr. Seuss

Just a couple of things to ponder E-Boy,

A few years ago, when I was persuing a counseling degree, the split between nature/nuture being tossed around was more like 75/25. While I'm not sure if we'll ever know for sure what it is, but from observation it seems pretty close.

As for changing the world, I've got an idea. Why don't we form a consortium of people changing their own little corner of the world? You, I, and countless others are doing their part in pockets around the world. If we could get together and showcase our accomplishments in one place we'd see how much of a difference we make.

David

Aww, don't apologise for reading too much. Your posts are always interesting, and they spark good conversations here. New concepts, and new ways of looking at things, are very good for the ADD brain. And I think that our ability to "think sideways" can indeed change the world. It's just not going to be easy, because too many people have a vested interest in keeping things the way they are.

Originally posted by E-boy
BEWARE EVIL DOERS! E-BOY IS COMING TO BRING THE LIGHT OF COMMON SENSE TO THE PUBLIC DISCOURSE AND LIBERATE THE FRAZZLED SOCCER MOMS FROM THE TYRANNY OF "PARENTING EXPERTS"; PROTECT THE WEARY CITIZENS FROM "SOCIAL ENGINEERS" WHO WOULD PLAY, "PLAYDOUGH" WITH THEIR VERY SPIRITS AND DRIVE THEM INTO A SENSE OF AESTHETIC NUMBNESS WITHOUT GARDENS, TOWN SQUARES, OR NEEDS FOR BEAUTY OR LOVE; AND DELIVER THE ACEDEMICS FROM PERSECUTION FOR DARING TO ASK QUESTIONS, EVEN ONES SOME PEOPLE HAVE A VESTED INTEREST IN KEEPING UNASKED!

IF I CANNOT MANAGE TO BRING THAT LIGHT OR ACCOMPLISH ANY OF THE ABOVE.... DO NOT GLOAT EVIL DOERS! FOR I SHALL COME FOR YOU ANYWAY AND WAVE MY HINEY AT YOU AND SAY HORRIBLE THINGS ABOUT YOUR MOTHERS! :-p

Woo-hoo! I'm ready to be liberated! (Or, at the very least, enjoy the expressions on the evil-doers' faces when you wave your hiney at them!) :D

E-boy "It's nice to be somewhere where the best I can hope for isn't to be grudgingly tolerated."
Bologna.. you are much more than tolerated. You were one of the first to make clear to me just how appropriate this place is for me. I have been in many situations where I have endeavoured to include some concept or another into the conversation and been met with blank stares. When I speak to you I know for the most part you can hear me. When you talk I can hear you quite well.

Please don't throttle back.. if it feels good.. enjoy the ride. < g >

pershingd I believe we do just that by healing ourselves. We can't begin to predict in how many different ways we effect the world around us by our change.

If the change is based on universal principles we cover the "big" picture beyond our own lives. Or at least that's my angle.. heh

Humility
Tolerance
Patience
Forgivness etc...

These are the skills I seek. I know them in my head.. but I want them in my heart.

Cheers! Ian.

Originally posted by itschaotic
E-boy "It's nice to be somewhere where the best I can hope for isn't to be grudgingly tolerated."
Bologna.. you are much more than tolerated. You were one of the first to make clear to me just how appropriate this place is for me. I have been in many situations where I have endeavoured to include some concept or another into the conversation and been met with blank stares. When I speak to you I know for the most part you can hear me. When you talk I can hear you quite well.

Please don't throttle back.. if it feels good.. enjoy the ride. < g >

pershingd I believe we do just that by healing ourselves. We can't begin to predict in how many different ways we effect the world around us by our change.

If the change is based on universal principles we cover the "big" picture beyond our own lives. Or at least that's my angle.. heh

Humility
Tolerance
Patience
Forgivness etc...

These are the skills I seek. I know them in my head.. but I want them in my heart.

Cheers! Ian.


I agree !! :D

To everyone:

If you still seek humility, tolerance, patience, and forgiveness then they are already well into your heart. These qualities are ones that must always be sought. Only when you claim to have mastered them is the journey lost.

David

:-) You Peeples sure did make me feel good today! :-)

Dave, Nuture Vs. Nature is a longterm oft changing debate. However it is more political these days than scientific. There is also a lot of misunderstanding about exacly what the difference between "heritable" and "heriditary" is. If a trait is heritable it refers to a connection between that trait and a genetic source but it does not follow that it is a "Direct" connection. For example, if one was looking at assertiveness it has been shown that physically attractive people tend to be substantially more assertive than more plain folk (the standards of attractiveness being set by cues to reproductive health, by the way) typically being far less patient when made to wait, for no particular reason. However, this may well be a consequence of people being more deferential to them because of their looks, and them taking advantage of it, than of any advantageous behavioral tendency. So, heritability, can be misleading if misunderstood.

I'm doing it again aren't I? :-(

I think I'm Going outside for a smoke. :-) Since I finished off my latest reading material (I don't really binge read, I am just bouncing back from a depression and it's been a long time coming). I've been reading some of Lynn Weiss's books. I'm on my second one now. I just finished "Success and ADD" and now I'm reading "ADD on the Job Making your ADD work for you".

I have to be honest. Some of Ms. Weiss's work is refreshing and very nice to read, but some of it baffles me to no end. For example, in her first book, she comments that adult ADDers are naturally graceful and more body aware and LESS accident prone... A part of me really would like to believe this. It would sort of work with some of my own observations of my own adulthood, my experiences on the soccer field, my reflexes in general, and such. I just can't find any data to support her claim. NONE. I want to believe, I really do, and lord knows she is far better educated than I am, but after a few years of dealing with doctors who don't know the first thing about whats wrong with me (even a few that were supposed to be specialists in their fields) trust isn't my strong suit when it comes to "EXPERTS" anymore. The other thing is, she puts such faith in ADD traits and abilities. WHICH IS GREAT. However, she takes it to the extreme of equating her intuition as being equivalent to clinical evaluations in accuracy. She basis this on "personal experience". Another way to put that, barring documentation would be to say "Anecdotal evidence". Call me a skeptic, I depend largely on intuitive decisions myself, I think some cases require more though and this, at least, requires some kind of evidence, for the benefit of the patients if no one else, that the intuitive approach is qualitatively equivalent to the clinical evaluation in accuracy. I know, I'm a weirdo for worrying about stuff like this...

Her books are still worth the time though. She and I share one thing very much in common. Neither of us believes for one second that ADD is a "Disorder".

And something else that is completely off the subject... Can someone please tell me why I am so intimidated by a stupid piddly one and a half mile timed run a couple sit-ups and push ups and a bit of stretching when I routinely run 5 and 6 miles a day? When I can pass the marine corps timed three mile runs? When I have no reason whatsoever to be nervous?! I think the worst part is that sometimes I get so nervous it actually screws up my run! One of the reasons I have been running so hard was to make sure that couldn't happen this time around. I HATE THESE THINGS!

E-Boy,

I'm with you when it comes to the heritable concept. I get nervous when people start being adamant that someone will be a certain way because of what their heritage is. I believe in tendencies. I fully believe, however, that people's tendencies can lean one way or the other due to genetics. Just my 2 cents worth.

I'm with you when it comes to the idea of accident proneness. Two things that come to mind is perhaps accident proneness being a guy thing, or (and more likely) it stems from whether or not you have the Hyperactive component or not.

As for the physical test coming up - do you have a tendency toward test-anxiety in general? If so, any task you do, regardless of ability, will automatically get more difficult.

Toodles,
David

I don't generally get test anxiety. I usually enjoy tests. In fact, I enjoy physical activity enormously. It is just that for some reason, I can't detach a small bit of nervousness from certain events (like shots, and the stupid PRT), and lately this one has ballooned into something bigger. I am not sure why, and I can't shake it. I have lowered my dosage on my anxiety meds in recent months and this may be a consequence of that.

In anycase, it will all be over with on the 24th. At the level of conditioning I have worked up to I can hardly screw it up unless I make myself sick from stressing this, or injure myself doing it. Neither seems too likely. So, I will just have to grit my teeth, and when the time comes use the excess "stress hormones" to beef up my start. Who knows, it might even net me a faster overall time?

Just keep focused and watch out for greyhounds. :)

David

So, I won't be changing the world today

Your right E-boy your NOT going to change the world today . Changing the world takes stamina, endurance, charisma, hope, faith in mankind, knowledge but most of all Love. Now, your not going to tell me that a navy man doesn't have that in him are you cause I won't buy it.

So, you haven't changed the world today but you've changed MY world and for the better if I do say so myself. I've alway's considered it an honor to know you even when we were standing on opposite sides of the fence. If you've taught me anything it's NOT to blindly follow the lead sheep but to think for myself and stand up for myself. For that gift I thank you.

One tiny step, one person at a time E-boy you'll get it done don't give up. Persistance is a vertue.

Hugs and kisses
Cherity

Heads up E-Boy,

Couldn't have said it better myself. Thanks Nucking.

David

Well, I suppose short legs like mine are good for baby steps... Certainly explains why I got stuck with the blasted things! :-<

If I could only stretch 'em out for the PRT... *SIGH!*

I am going to look like a quail. My upper body will be chugging along at a reasonable pace, and my short little legs will be a blur. :-/ Maybe I should put one of those little dingies in my hair to complete the effect? Nah, with my luck one of the local sportsman would shoot my sorry butt. ;-) "I swear to God Bubba! That quail must have been six foot tall if it was an inch!"

At least you can find pants long enough. :)

David

If you're a Scooby-Doo fan.... Have you seen the way Velma walks in "A Pup Named Scooby-Doo"? I think there are worse things than a quail to be mistaken for - bird shot is a lot smaller than, say, an AK-47 round.

Cheer Up E-Boy.

David

mmmmmmmmm K no reply *grins naughtily*

Ok - That was weird :)

David

I wouldn't call it wierd; I just had one of those naughty thought's pop into my head but luckily I remembered this is a family forum at just the right time lol.

Cherity,

Your version of Naughty is staying up late to watch Leno! ;-)

Dave,

Innocent ol' Ms. Futs might have been worried about you "Showing a little ankle" if yer pants ain't long enough. ;-)

:-O OMG! That man is showing his ankles! Has he no shame?! Doesn't he know the effect that has on sweet innocent young ladies?! SCANDALOUS! HA HA HA HA!

Sorry Futs, only teasing. I know there is a big difference between just being a very nice person and being naive. You are obviously a nice person by choice.

Today is the morning. It got cancelled the last day they scheduled it. So, it gets rather squarely in the way of my schedule. I was supposed to be some 45 miles east of here already. :-) In my car, of course, not running. I wish I had that kind of speed and endurance! Anyway, the hospital staff over at Portsmouth were very understanding and told me to just take care of my PRT, and then drive on out afterwards. So, no worries there anyway. Just have to manage this stupid run.

In my last practive run, I ended up doing 7 miles and in the process "Passed" the PRT twice one in the time I did the first mile and a half, and then again at the end during the last mile and a half. I also passed the Marine corps PFT, which is the same sort of test, but a timed three mile run instead of one and a half. One would think I would not be nervous after that...

Only thing is, Dan doesn't tick that way. I am worried. The weather is HOT, even this early, I am nervous and I can't help it. It's sort of a big deal, in this case because of past difficulties with the test. I passed it last time, but we were in the gulf and the command, decided to restrict it to weigh ins, rather than try to run everyone onboard on treadmills (We had 10 treadmills for over five thousand people... Not a logistically feasible solution). I ran it anyway, for "My own information", and passed it quite handily. The time before that I ran slow though. I thought I was good to go, but I just couldn't push the pace. Anyway, a pass here today makes that failure drop off the end of the "timeline" so to speak. You are only allowed three in any four year period. I don't want any creeping up on me. I still have no idea what was wrong with me that day. May just be my age catching up with me.

Like many ADDers, my body responds as though it were a lot younger, but some of the meds I was on may have conspired with my advancing age (OH, I'M SO OLD! PUT ME OUT TO PASTURE AT 34!) to make my "bounceback" a lot lower than days of yore. In short, I have to work at it these days, to stay in shape. :-) The good news is that my max heart rate is a lot higher than it is "Supposed to be". It's supposed to be 186, but I have pushed 212, without real discomfort. Fatigue? HECK YEAH! No pain though. No, I didn't know it wasn't supposed to go that high at the time.

So, why am I worried?! BECAUSE IT'S ME! ARRRGH! Lord knows I manage to screw enough things up. Time to go run though!

Hey, E-boy, good luck today. You'll do fine.

Wait 'till you're 54, and everything you do physically skips a day, and revisits you on the second day after. It's weird, because by the time the aches and pains hit, I can't remember what I did to deserve it.

Have fun.

Go get 'em, E-boy! You're still in good shape, and remember, 34 is not old. One day you'll look back and laugh ... ;)

GRRRR. Didn't do so hot. :-( Not the end of the world. Not good either. I just don't understand how being "on the spot" can take so much out of me... :-(

Chief who runs it, checks the gym sign in sheets for the folks he has on Mando, and he's seen me in the gym on several occasions, as have the X.O., Chaplain, and a whole lot of other folk. So, it's not like they don't know I am more than capable of this. Or at the minimum, know that I am not sitting on my rear not preparing myself. However, you have to be able to do it under test conditions. I am going to run it again on this course, with my stopwatch and see what I get. Somehow I already know what will happen... Last time I had that failure, I returned the next day to do a "Non-scored" run with my shipmates that hadn't run yet. To offer moral support partly, but mostly for my own prides sake. I needed to make a consipicuous show of the fact I could pass the stupid thing and do so with a reasonably good time. I passed it on the day it didn't count by a margin of over two minutes. SIGH! :-(

You don't want to tell military folk that you have trouble with unexpected stress levels from a PRT test. It doesn't matter that REAL situations don't have that effect on you, they view it as a weakness not appropriate to the military.

I keep telling myself, "You know what you can do, this is stupid to get so bent over that it screws you up!" It doesn't shut off the gut reaction to "scrutiny". I don't get anxiety over written tests.

It all sounds like a bunch of lame *** excuses. That makes it worse feeling...

THIS IS CRAP. I have to stop doing this to myself. Kicking the crap out of myself only perpetuates it. I am going to run this thing on my own tomorrow, and see what I get. I know I got the passing times last week. It isn't a question of conditioning, it's a question of anxiety and letting it get to me.

So, even knowing that I really am in quite good shape, and a heck of a lot faster than I ran on this stupid test (felt like I was dying today!), Knowing that I KNOW I did all I could to get this right, and knowing that it ISN'T the end of the world, how come I feel so damn bad? :-(

Well, gotta get a shower and hit the road to Portsmouth. CBT group, to help me figure out how to "Be me" without tearing myself apart, and overreacting to everything. Good timing eh?
:-p

I'll have you know I can be extremely naughty lol. I'm sure you did a lot better then you give yourself credit for and to show my support I decided to run a mile and was all excited to tell you about it. Well, I made it from the starting line to half way around the track then caught a whiff of a friends bar-b-q and that was enough of that runnin crud. *smiles* If it makes you feel any better at least YOU FINISHED!!!!!!

Kay always says we’re most dangerous when we beat ourselves up.

You need to look around, find yourself and give yourself a pat on the head. Then, maybe buy yourself a drink and forget it.

We get beat up enough by life…

And one other thing...I only go into shock when anything ABOVE the knee shows. *sticks tongue out* lol