View Full Version : Your life with Aspergers


Werl
08-08-10, 01:02 PM
I was recently diagnosed with borderline Aspergers.

Please post some stories of how having (borderline) Aspergers has affected your life, I'll start with mine.

After moving schools, I left all my friends behind. I tried making friends (This is before I was diagnosed with Aspergers) but I slowly started to dislike all my peers (mostly the boys). After 2 years, I started HATING them for what I thought was there fault. After learning about it (and my parents helping me understand what it meant) I understood that it wasn't necessarily their fault but rather their understanding of my social norms. Because of this my understanding of them is completely different.

ADHDTigger
08-08-10, 10:23 PM
I've heard you say in the past that you hate your peers. Regardless, what I experience of you doesn't seem consonant with hatred. I believe I even said at one point that it seemed more like indifference to me. They don't operate at your level and therefore they don't interest you much.

For many years, my chosen peer group was not people of my own age. I associated with people who were anywhere from 10 to 40 years older. I understood those people significantly better than I did people in my own age group. My mom used to joke that she had given birth to a grown up. In every way but emotionally, I was more advanced than my peers. Emotionally, I was behind.

I think that it is good that you can see how your beliefs about your peers shaped your thinking about them and that understanding their challenges allows you to see them differently. Sometimes, that is all it takes.

Werl
08-08-10, 10:55 PM
For many years, my chosen peer group was not people of my own age. I associated with people who were anywhere from 10 to 40 years older. I understood those people significantly better than I did people in my own age group. In every way but emotionally, I was more advanced than my peers. Emotionally, I was behind.

That's exactly me. When I was 5 or so, I would talk to people many years older than I am. They would tell my parents that they forgot that I was so young. I can start an in depth conversation and leave my peers feeling (I think) dumb found.

Thanks.

Crazygirl79
08-09-10, 02:26 AM
Thanks for this thread Werl, I rave on and on and on about my life with AS once I get rediagnosed lol (I'm already on the waiting list at the Minds and Hearts Clinic which is a specialist clinic for people with ASD)

Thanks for the visitors message too.

Selena

ADHDTigger
08-09-10, 01:55 PM
I think that many AS and ADHD people communicate better outside of their age group, especially when they are young. I found linking intellectually to others to be significantly more satisfying than linking emotionally so that's what I did. I can't stand conversation about trivial *stuff*.

I have never been diagnosed AS but can pass the test. At my age, I don't know that diagnosis would really provide me with new information.

mimi'sdreaming
08-09-10, 02:45 PM
I think that many AS and ADHD people communicate better outside of their age group, especially when they are young. I found linking intellectually to others to be significantly more satisfying than linking emotionally so that's what I did. I can't stand conversation about trivial *stuff*.

I have never been diagnosed AS but can pass the test. At my age, I don't know that diagnosis would really provide me with new information.

I just started a new thread on ADHD~Autism connection. Thanks Tigger for making the point that communicating outside a peer age group can happen with AS and ADHD. That seems to be my son, only with his peers in class and in a large setting. One on one, he's great. He's also great with his best friend that is a year younger as well as our neighbors (who love him). All the teachers at school love him as well. One has mentioned before that if he would be with his classmates like he is with them, they would find him hilarious as well.

He seems to be intimidated by his peer group mainly due to struggling with school work when it comes so easily to the rest of them.

Anyway, I'm trying to work my way through this maze of ADHD, AS or HFA. It's all so confusing!

ADHDTigger
08-09-10, 04:04 PM
There have been a lot of positions on whether there is a direct connection between ADHD and Autism spectrum. I don't know if anything has been clearly defined as yet, but I see validity to the argument that a link exists.

Scooter77
09-16-10, 05:13 AM
I know that a high percentage of people with Aspergers also have ADHD, so I would imagine they are closely related in some way. I think it's Dr Melilo's book Disconnected Kids? that talks about disorders such as these and others being on the same spectrum.
And I also, have always gotten on better with older people. I still find people around my age judgemental and daunting...older people tend to be a bit more accepting...even if its just that they see me as younger and therefore give me leeway.