View Full Version : Do you feel intellectually challenged?


resa
08-18-10, 11:19 AM
I feel this way! I'm not sure I have a learning disability or not, I have spoken of this on the forum somewhere....

I'm only on a 5th grade math level. 11th grade reading level.

I feel out of place if I were to speak to educated persons. I feel I have no place in conversation with them. Since I often do not know what their talking about. Alot of times when ppl or my Dr is explaining something I may ask twice to repeat it but still don't understand it and just go on and act as though I did bc its embarrassing to keep saying umm what!

I remember being in elementary and in the 1st-3rd grade I was an honor student. I fail 4th grade bc I didnt try at all that yr.. and when repeated it I strived to be the best in the class! I was one of the best students that year. Although I and a few of the other kids took a special reading class that year. 5th grade was not so bad I did fairly well no D's or F's.......6th grade was good too. 7th grade I had trouble and was in a private christian school. They put me in a special math class.
Which I passed somehow but dont think I really understood it. 8th grade was harder back in public schools and barely passed that.
9th grade I knew I was getting ready to go to Job Corps. I didn't try as hard bc I knew I couldnt do the work. Geometry, algebra and science was so difficult. When I dropped out I had straight F's!!! I took up typing in 9th grade and when I left the school I had an F in that too. But somehow I must have learned something in that class bc I do not need to look at the keyboard to type :)...but that is the only thing I got out of high school.

Went to Job Corps studies for the GED took the test and failed and gave up bc I just couldnt do it. When I was 23 and my son was a yr old, I went to a school that teaches GED. Stayed there a few weeks and quit bc no matter how many times the teacher tried to get me to understand it, again I acted like I understood and didn't or if I did understand it I would forget it almost immediately. I feel intellectually challenged.

My mother had 6 children. Only 1 graduated, 1 got a GED in prison. 1 is on a 2nd grade level for reading and math. 1 is on a 5th grade level, and the other was in special educational classes and she dropped out of the "11th" grade and got married.........then there's me also on 5th grade level for math. I can't even get a well respected job, that makes me feel worthless :(........i pray and ask God, "if i don't succeed in anything else in this life, please let me succeed at being a good mother", Which sometimes I think I'm failing at that too. anyways thats long enough a story lol thanks for reading :)

fropunka
08-18-10, 11:34 AM
Something I learned a long time ago is:

If you are talking to someone, and you don't get what they are talking about, ask what they mean! I do it all the time. You can learn a TON about different things by doing that too. Just say "I'm not quite understanding what you mean, can you please clarify?"

It's a bit different with my friends or my family though, cuz then "Please clarify?" comes out as "What the hell are you talking about??" :p

resa
08-18-10, 11:37 AM
LOL, I've asked but after the second or third time, I see frustration written all over their face, sometimes they may proceed to explain other times they say nevermind.....

weslhg
08-22-10, 08:16 PM
I feel you pain. I went to school through the 8th grade. I thought I was stupid have been made fun of Etc. Etc. My wife thinks I went to school through the 11th grade. What I did was buy self teaching books, I taught myself. I passed the GED test the first time, and the SAT test the first time. Don't think about what others think when you ask them to repeat what they say or ask them to explain what they are saying.

YOU ARE NOT STUPID

mimi'sdreaming
08-24-10, 07:11 PM
Absolutely! Find what you are good at and do it.

School was never my thing. Most of it is a fog to me. Math? Just forget it! I never felt smart, but faked a lot of it. Somehow, I made it through college and ended up in sales. That's where I thrive!

Still on occasion I find myself in LaLa land while someone is explaining something. That's when I have to reign in my attention and ask again. LOL!

resa, I'm sure you are a wonderful mom! Realize now that school is all behind you and it doesn't matter.

Love and appreciate who you are!

phEight
08-25-10, 07:29 PM
Hey there.. let me share with you one of the most simple and helpful thing I've learned in my life so far. The first thing is knowing human beings aren't like money. We are not each worth different amounts like a penny, quarter, 50 dollar bill, 100 dollar bill, etc. I truly believe we are all worth the same and deserve the same respect... beggar or president.

I suffered for so many years and had pretty terrible times growing up because I thought so lowly of myself. It's been so difficult fighting this mindset, but I have made progress. I really felt a sort of 'tug' in my chest while reading your post because I've felt that type of pain and I wouldn't want anyone to go through it.

One of the best things I've done is I easily admit my faults and the things I am not good at. Before I would keep that inside. I realized I would keep that inside because I didn't want to be that way... and it was embarrassing to admit my inadequacy. There are somethings I still keep private... but things like math I began to tell the person who was trying to teach me math or chemistry something like.. "hey.. i really suck at this stuff so it might take me awhile to learn it." Sometimes the person couldn't teach me or get the point across... and I was okay with that or said I'll work on it some more at another time. The thing is... I didn't feel any negative feelings saying that... I felt confident. Even if you don't want to speak up about it that's fine as long as you're not feeling negative inside. I realized I just don't have a brain wired for some things, but that doesn't make me any less of a person. If someone wants to laugh at me because I struggled with seemingly basic math... I won't pay them the slightest attention. Before I would have felt like **** if someone laughed at me.

The biggest problem I think is many people begin this negative thinking cycle and do bad at things they would have done good at if they had positive thoughts. And because they did bad at whatever, the may even avoid it forever because of fear of failure. Now when I teach math and chemistry to other students... often I run into the guy or girl who I can just see is struggling not just with the material... but they're struggling emotionally too. I try to alleviate that emotional distress and make sure they don't feel "slow" and that it's okay if it takes awhile to learn and grasp. It's amazing how much it helps for some people when that emotional distress is somewhat alleviated.

I'm not saying you can learn to do math really well or read at a college level. I'm saying that the negative thoughts and the inability to accept shortcomings wholeheartedly will prevent you from learning something you could have learned if it was approached with acceptance that you just might never get it. I'm saying that you are a whole person as you are. You may or may not be the perfect mother... but I can assure you if you try to worry less about being inadequate you will be a slightly better mother than if you consistently doubted and didn't accept yourself.

Acceptance... it's the best thing anyone can do for themselves.

resa
08-26-10, 12:35 PM
Thank You all for being so nice to me and being encouraging, it really helps. Thanks again! :)