hi... i originally posted this on another thread cause i'm supernewbie; i realize now it should have been its own thread. basically i just started therapy for what i suspect is OCD and ADD if that makes sense. here's the gist:

i start off a semester great, then... every reading assignment i don't do---every project that looms closer on the horizon causes me to feel "burned out" even though i know that if i just did the work i would be so motivated.

i am not lazy: the work i do takes me three times as long as everyone else in the class to do and looks like it took me half as long to do. the work i turn in doesn't show the countless minutes spent worrying about it not turning out, or the obsessive compulsive nail-biting/skin-around-the-nail-biting/scab-picking/hand-rubbing that punctuated the effort every two minutes. trouble is, no one really takes me seriously when i say i have a problem cause up until last spring semester, i had a 4.0 in my senior year. every class slipped in the spring to B's. everyone takes this as a sign that i am human and that it's great, but i know it's not the quality of work i can do if i just DID it.

basically i have one more year of grad school until thesis starts, and if i can't be more disciplined i will miss a big opportunity getting feedback on my project (architecture) from qualified professionals, as well as making contacts in the profession. so i try therapy.

i realize that i probably have obsessive-compulsive disorder, and the increasing joint pain i am feeling with age makes all of my nervous tics that much more of a burden on my energy, so i call a behavioral clinic and make an appointment to talk with a therapist. well she's great and seems to get me and then she gives me a small piece of paper with the next two appointments written on it and i do what i usually do which is to read and remember only the first date i need to know (because i cannot keep track of anything in a calendar, or on little pieces of paper) and end up remembering the second appointment instead of the first.

i show up to the second appointment and she has decided before i get there that she is going to impress upon me the importance of making it to the sessions by telling me she wants me to get a calendar and that she isn't comfortable setting up more appointments with me if i am going to trust it to memory. wow, wrong tactic for me, i can tell you that. well we talk about for the rest of the time my extremely bad reaction to this and long story short, i don't know if i trust her now... i thought she got me, but obviously she didn't if she thought i just forget things out of thoughtlessness or laziness or chosen disorganization or something. if i don't want meds, what's a graduate student with only a year left before starting thesis to do??? anyone here successfully recover from ocd without meds? i need some hope here. i spend another saturday telling myself i would get stuff done and after a day of effort i have half of the dishes washed and about half of the living room cleared of clothes. uuugh.

advice? any welcome... i'm rather not do meds (i eat organic foods, etc) but i feel pretty dysfunctional up so i'm not totally adverse to them... maybe.
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I really wish I had been diagnosed and medicated when I was in school (B.Sc. and later an M.B.A.), as I know I would have had much better grades and been able to work more efficiently, given how I feel when taking them now (I take dexedrine for ADHD and an anti-depressant for mild anxiety and a touch of dysthemia).
There is no question in my mind, with medication I am a happier and more productive person. Not that I am un-productive without - I DID get through school, and was never on probation, etc. - but I was never on the Dean's list either!
I found that the stimulants are particularly effective with procrastination (like your Saturday example - I used to waste many a day just fretting about what to do and never getting around to doing it!).
It is possible to treat ADHD and such without meds, but you really have to be committed to therapy, have a good therapist, and continue to see them for as long as you want results - with both meds and therapy, if you stop, the symptoms will come back!
Medication is very much worth trying - you may not be so opposed once you see the benefits vs living with the dysfunction.
Good luck,
Greg