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Captains log of troubleshooting steps taken, results and analysis of physical, emotional and intellectual response.

Documentation to aid in resolution of known corruption in operation system code language translation and possible multiple shorts in circuit wiring, resulting in CPU malfunction.

(Research notes may include but are not limited to to following; frustration, whining, fear, anger, grief, denial and extremely dark and dry humor...please consult your owner's manual for interraction warnings before opening)
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Empty, cold, grey day...

Posted 03-04-10 at 08:07 PM by carped1em
It's wet, grey and I have a nasty cold. The kind that makes your teeth ache and your eyeballs feel like they're going to spring out of your skull every time you bend over.

I miss him the most on days like this. He would do anything to make me feel better. Now the house is cold and empty. Silence punctuated by the occasional coughing fit or blow of the schnoz.
I've forsaken my meds for several varieties of cold remedy. It's triple the weirdness.

We used to go to this 24 hour autozone near the house. The first weekend we hung out together, we decided to fix my tail light at midnight. While we were replacing the bulb under the lights of the strip mall, I noticed the mexican market next door. They had all of their bakery items listed on one side of the glass panel and their meats on the other. From a distance, it looks like one big sign that says,
"BEEF CAKES
CHICKEN BREAD" across the top.
We laughed for about an hour.

I had a bad root canal in November. They didn't finish it correctly & I ended up with an infection that made me look like sloth from "Goonies". I refused to let them hospitalize me, so I had to go get antibiotic shots every 12 hrs. and take two others in pill form. Needless to say, food was not my friend. We picked up my prescriptions and were heading to the third store to find the organic butternut squash soup that was the ONLY thing I could even think about eating, when the check engine light came on.
We stopped by our favorite autozone to see what was up. I was curled up in the front seat in a tent that I'd made out of his hoodie. While the guy was checking the computer, he came around to my side to tell me it would only be a second & ask if I needed anything.
Inside I was trying to be funny but apparently something was lost in translation when I said I wanted Chicken Bread. He looked so focused when he nodded & said ok. After a couple of seconds he opened my door again. "Um, what kind of bread goes in Chicken Bread?" I sort of laughed & pointed to the sign. He laughed & shook his head.
He says he feels like an idiot when I tell that story.
I think it was the sweetest thing anyone's ever said to me. He didn't care that he had no idea what I was asking for. It was what I wanted and dammit, he was going to get it for me.

I miss him horribly when I'm alone.
Sometimes now, I miss him more when we're together.
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