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Rating: 2 votes, 4.50 average.

10 things to do while soaking in the tub.

Posted 02-13-08 at 07:46 AM by Asylum
1) Count all of your fingers and toes, just in case your Mum forgot to do it when you were born.
2) Look for any freckles or moles that look like the virgin Mary, so you can take a photo and put it on e-bay.
3) Find lone, weird hair and say; 'Didn't i pluck you like, yesterday?'
4) Imagine lone, weird hair answering. 'You think you have problems. I was promised a place on your head. Instead i have to stare at your navel all day!'
5) Check for dry elbow. It is the twenty-third most common cause of depression. Dry elbow must be fought at all costs.
6) Meditate - the tub is your consciousness, your thoughts the grey, soapy water slowly draining away through the gap under the plug.
7) Think calmly and rationally about the enemies you have made, and the number of small explosive devices you will need in order to get even.
8) Check the care instructions on your flannel. You may be unaware of vital information.
9) Stretch out your legs and try to count the hairs on your big toes. If you can, your optometrist is a crook.
10) Try to remember if you have ever, in your entire life, seen the backs of your knees.
If not, ponder this: Do the backs of your knees actually exist?
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Comments

  1. Old
    meadd823's Avatar
    LOL- I think this is awesome!
    Posted 02-23-08 at 07:08 PM by meadd823 meadd823 is offline
  2. Old
    SparklySarah's Avatar
    HAHAHAHAHAH excellent!!
    Posted 06-26-08 at 10:18 AM by SparklySarah SparklySarah is offline
  3. Old
    Zoie's Avatar
    This is awesome thank you.

    I can see the back on my knees, although I had to try after I read that part. Yoga comes to the rescue again.
    Posted 06-26-08 at 10:22 AM by Zoie Zoie is offline
  4. Old
    Tabbycat's Avatar
    I REALLY like #5 and 7...
    Posted 07-10-10 at 08:35 PM by Tabbycat Tabbycat is offline
 
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