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<![CDATA[ADD Forums - Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder Support and Information Resources Community - ADDiction & Substance Abuse]]> http://www.addforums.com/forums en Tue, 22 Jan 2019 01:08:03 GMT vBulletin 60 http://www.addforums.com/forums/images/misc/rss.jpg <![CDATA[ADD Forums - Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder Support and Information Resources Community - ADDiction & Substance Abuse]]> http://www.addforums.com/forums stopping smoking. advice, encouragement! http://www.addforums.com/forums/showthread.php?t=194304&goto=newpost Sun, 13 Jan 2019 00:29:56 GMT something I think I need a place to sort of record my progress.

I went to the docs Thursday and he didn't put me on chantex, instead he wants me to stair step down.

so I'm getting my "smoking breaks" down to 4 times a day, so far today I'm on 3, had a good 6 hour stop between breaks when I could really start to feel the cravings.

I tried the 4 mg patch and it really didn't work, I would get a burnt taste on my tongue oddly enough. so I'm trying the 2 mg patch and that seems to be having some success in helping with cravings, I guess finding the correct method for myself is what works, however, I'm willing to give anything a try for I want to be off nicotene(ecigs) for good in a month or two.

I'm thinking about it in terms of health. I'm working out more and the less I smoke the more oxygen can get to my muscles to promote muscle growth and healing.

I'm also thinking about it in terms of this next college semester. the less I smoke the more oxygen get's to my brain and the clearer I should be able to think.

also been thinking about it in terms of money saved. 8 bucks a day down the hole, if I could get that down to 8 bucks every other day, other other day and so on, that in itself would pay for another vacation, car payments, rent for a house/apartment etc...

been thinking about the Twizzlers thing, maybee replacing a "ritual" with a Twizzlers run instead, or maybee start a ritual that I want to "replace" with Twizzlers at first.

any suggestion anyone has is welcome. in a month I go back to the docs for accountability and I really want to be down a couple of "rituals" ]]>
Drogheda98 http://www.addforums.com/forums/showthread.php?t=194304
Pharmacy gave me Focalin in error not dex. I compulsively abused it. http://www.addforums.com/forums/showthread.php?t=194298&goto=newpost Fri, 11 Jan 2019 16:21:33 GMT First time posting. Ive been on 20-40 mg dex IR for over 1 year now. I typically have trouble making my script last 30 days & often go without that last week. But that's another issue. Here's my problem.

Pharmacy have me 40 mg Focalin IR instead of 40mg Dex IR. I questioned that the pills were different looking & they said it was a different brand. Ok by me. So I took my dose & they seemed to hit me hit me especially hard, but Ibfiguref itbwad because of the different brand. Similar boost in mood, motivation etc but when it wore off I'd redose beyond the prescribed amount for the day, much moreso than usual. I insufflated them. It hit me like it was cocaine. Made me manic. I was in a haze for 4 days. My judgment was way way off. The pharmacy called on day 2 & said they gave me Focalin in error, but it was a similar med. Ok. So I figured if its similar then I'll just keep it. No prob. I continued on my merry way all weekend. Cleaning, shopping & feeling very "up". But more intense. As soon as I felt a slight dip in my good mood I would compulsively redose. Then I went grocery shopping in my manic state & I got stopped for shoplifting because I had mistakenly had items under my coat & they said it was considered concealment. I've never been in trouble with the law and was mortified. The cops came but didnt arrest me, saying I'd receive a Municipal court summons. I went home mortified. Then on the 4th day pharmacy calls & asks me if I can return the erroneous meds. Egads! I've been blowing thru them. I brought whatever was left back to the pharmacy & confessed that I had a profound compulsive reaction to the Focalin. They called my dr who was very concerned about my cardiac health etc from taking high doses & made me get an EKG. Which was normal. Holy ****show Batman!!

My psychiatrist put me on a weekly pick up schedule at pharmacy for the remainder of the month. I meet with her in a few days & gotta explain my troublesome behavior. I also gotta get her to draft a letter for court which may serve as a defense as per my new $1500 lawyer.

Im hoping she'll continue my 40mg dex IR. But who the hell knows. Talk about a giant red flag.

Any words of reassurance would be most appreciated. I know I screwed up & got caught. But it'll teach me one hell of a lesson about not exceeding my daily dose. Pray for me😩😩😩 ]]>
VV4838 http://www.addforums.com/forums/showthread.php?t=194298
Looking to connect with others w/ Adderall overuse issues for support http://www.addforums.com/forums/showthread.php?t=194252&goto=newpost Fri, 04 Jan 2019 08:12:55 GMT I hope you will consider emailing instead of PMing me, as I doubt have the time and energy to check back here often. Even from a throwaway or anonymous email address you make strictly for the purpose of communicating.
[Moderator note: Members who wish to receive e-mail from other members should click "User CP", then under "Settings & Options", find "E-mail Options" and check the box next to "Receive Email from Other Members". Posting e-mail addresses, phone numbers, or social media accounts publicly is prohibited by site guidelines. - Namazu]

I hope to get support from others as I figure out how to further remediate my issues with overusing Adderall, and vice versa. I am based in NYC and would love to meet IRL support connections, but am open to remote supportive connections.

My story summary:

I was first prescribed Adderall in 2008 and couldn't even handle my 10mg IR initial prescribed dose. Ultimately, I got beneficial results by spreading it out over 2.5mg doses 4x a day.

This regimen continued for about a year or so, but taking Adderall alone (without anti-depressant or anti-anxiety medication) would cause me crippling anxiety and panic attacks.

In 2010, a moderate dose of a common anti-depressant (an SSRI) was introduced into my regimen which seemed to remediate the attacks. I definitely still had anxiety, but no longer had panic attacks.

For the next 2 years, there was a consistent and effective yin and yang between my anti-depressant SSRI (Lexapro @ 10mg/day) and my Adderall "sweet spot" of 20mg/day IR (taken in 5mg doses 4x day).

At the beginning of 2012, however, there was a perfect storm and everything hit the fan: my closest family member passed away, my insurance changed and I ended up with an incredibly absent psychiatrist, and then I found myself in an extremely toxic and abusive relationship with someone I had known for a long time but moved in with me soon after I lost my close family member.

With my new psychiatrist, I mentioned having lingering anxiety, and his suggestion was to increase my Adderall dose. I don't know how to describe this physician's misguided approach and subsequent indifferent treatment as things spiraled out, but basically over the course of just 3-4 months, my dose was skyrocketed from 20mg/day (taken in 5mg doses 4x per day) up to 120mg/day (taken in 30mg doses 4x per day).

It took me almost a year to realize that the 120mg/day dose of Adderall was making me manic, aggressive, and also starting paradoxically make me extremely lethargic.

Once I realized this, I immediately tried to get the dose back down to 20mg/day, and there was strong indications that the aforementioned yin and yang was returning and Adderall at a more normal dose was starting to be consistently effective again.

But by then my life had become such a mess, and I started to relapse. Furthermore, I even began taking even more Adderall, and began occasionally exceeding even the 120mg/day (sometimes finishing 1 month's supply in 2 weeks).

Unfortunately, I stayed with the same psychiatrist and somehow always managed/was granted an early refill thus never went without Adderall even when I used it all up way too quickly (aka i sometimes would go through Adderall at a rate of on average 240mg/day for two weeks, yet still get a refill after those two weeks for another 120mg/day).

From 2012-2016 my dose basically was a yo-yo as I continued to relapse and relapse again. I've never even read about anyone who has consumed as much Adderall as I did for that span of 5 years.

Things really got crazy in 2016. After one major major relapse, my health declined to extremely scary depths: I had gained 100 pounds, I would be awake just a few hours each day it seemed, and I was in bed at all times (not working, living on the floor of a relative's basement room).

Honestly, the only thing that saved me was a pharmacist intervening, and when I tried to get yet another early refill, he simply said no and on top of that calculated the days I had refilled too early from the previous couple of refills and said he would not authorize a refill until the total sum of those days combined had passed, essentially putting me like in a penalty box.

After this, I finally switched psychiatrists and was ultimately able to taper down to zero. After reaching zero mg of Adderall, I was able to go for 2.5 months completely abstinent from Adderall (after almost a decade of taking it daily, with the last 5 years of that period being at the absurd yo-yo-ing doses that probably averaged out to about 100mg/day for 5 years straight everyday).

After the 2.5 months of abstinence that I was so lucky to get, I needed to start working to support myself, and I went back on Adderall around the summer of 2017.

When I went back on Adderall in mid-2017, it was apparent that my brain indeed had healed/rejuvenated to a certain degree (thanks to the 2.5 month abstinence period), but it was also clear that it had not healed/rejuvenated back to the condition it was in 2008 nor 2010-2011 when my sweet spot was 20 mg/day.

From Mid-2017 to the present basically, I have been taking about 40-60mg/day, but that has included some period 2-3 week breaks of abstinence. But during periods where I take about 60mg/day for too many consecutive weeks, I start to get the lethargic effects again and it seems clear that 60mg/day is: A) still to high for me; and also B) that my brain has not fully healed/recovered.

In 2018, I was able to make it through a vocational training program and successful land and hold down a job for a decent stint. I was then accepted into a school program for a better job that I believe is a good all-around fit (a program that would lead to a job with a more livable wage and also that is more service-oriented and would not heavily require me to take Adderall to perform).

In other words, if I can get through the program and get a job (which I should be able to if I pass my classes, given the nature of the industry I am studying for), I believe I could effectively perform my job without needing Adderall.

I have decided to stretch out my class load so that I will actually have a pretty light schedule for school this upcoming 2019 spring semester.

I really wish I could make it through the semester without any Adderall at all because I still know that my brain needs more time to heal if I ever hope to reobtain that 20mg/day yin and yang equilibrium. But I know it's going to be extraordinarily difficult—not just because of the pressure of school, but also because being abstinent from Adderall makes taking care of myself and functioning difficult too.

I really could use a support network of connections with people I can text, call, and communicate in real-time. I'm hoping some people out there might have similar issues and be interested in creating the same kind of supportive network/connections.

Again, I am based in NYC and finding in-real-person connections would be a dream come true, but I'm also looking for remote connections to text, email, talk on the phone, or communicate with via social media, etc.

I have been attending AA and other 12-step meetings, but simply have not found any for Adderall specific support nor have I found many people with comparable situations within those meetings.

I am open to message boards or forums or subreddits or whatever, but I haven't found those very effective in the past, so my ideal situation would be connecting on a more individual and real-time basis.

I am open to more approaches than just trying to be as abstinent as long as possible, and I am trying my best to work with my psychiatrist and a therapist on these issues, too, but I know that finding supportive connections would be so huge in fascilitating my further recover so I am hoping this post finds some relevant people.

Thanks for reading and best of luck to all who are struggling ]]>
adderalloveruse http://www.addforums.com/forums/showthread.php?t=194252
Meant to toot my own horn sooner-6 years sober http://www.addforums.com/forums/showthread.php?t=194208&goto=newpost Thu, 27 Dec 2018 06:14:40 GMT 12/13/12 I had 6 years of sobriety. If someone had told me I would be going though this crap back then and staying sober I never would have believed it. 12/13/12 I had 6 years of sobriety. If someone had told me I would be going though this crap back then and staying sober I never would have believed it. ]]> sarahsweets http://www.addforums.com/forums/showthread.php?t=194208