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-   -   My Adderall Journal (bad experience - 33 year old female) (http://www.addforums.com/forums/showthread.php?t=94474)

That1WierdGirl 12-20-10 04:34 PM

My Adderall Journal (bad experience - 33 year old female)
 
Okay one thing that Adderall did for me that was good was to take away most of my procrastination tendencies. So in an extremely rare move (for me) starting on the third day and going through most of the time I was taking it I kept a rather detailed and regular (again rare for me) journal on how it effected me.

I have decided to type it all out here - It is a bit long so it could take a while to put it all in (especially if I get distracted). I don't know how long a post can be here but I'll try to use as few posts as possible.

Pleas note that the 'coming down' sections describe what happened either while the medication was wearing off or had worn off.

-------------------

Day one 10/26/2010 Tuesday

Dosage 1 20 mg tablet before Breakfast on an empty stomach

Good Effects - Others noted that my speech was not as rapid as normal
-Increased calmness/Hyperactivity decreased
-More likely to realize I had forgotten something

Bad effects -Headache
- Grogginess even though I had 8 hrs of sleep
-Logic processes malfunctioning (for example I had trouble remembering how to make a phone call)
- Felt 'slowed down'
- Dizzy
- Trouble with balance
- Tired for 1st few hours after taking

Coming Down - All night I felt tired but was too alert to sleep (I did eventually fall asleep and got a full 8 hrs)

Possible secondary contributors - took Dayquil in morning and Alieve at night.

Thoughts - I really do not feel myself. It's like I can barely function much less do anything. However I do notice my ability to focus is up and I'm not distracted by every little thing. I did some research on Adderall and found my experience was common. There also seems to be a 'breaking in' period of about 2 weeks. Tomorrow I will take it after breakfast and see if that helps.

----------

Day 2 10/27/2010 Wednessday

Dosage - 1 20mg tablet AFTER breakfast

Good Effects - Starting to feel the need to prioritize
- calm/not hyper
- ability to concentrate a little better

Bad Effects - My logic process is getting better but it's still slow
-Dizzy
-Tired after taking
-Feel slowed down but not as much as yesterday
-Grogginess again
-Decreased appetite

Coming down - Was too Alert to sleep on time so ended up waking up late again.

Thoughts - Received two tops today. One of them looks perfect with a broad belt. I've got so many thoughts about how to make belts for them going thought my mind right now. the funny thing is the thoughts are a lot more organized than I am used to. It's like I'm seeing the creative and logical construction of a belt in my mind from beginning to end. I have S18 - I'll buy some material with that and work on it tomorrow.

---------------

Day 3 10/28/2010 Thursday

Dosage - 1 20mg tablet after breakfast

Good Effects - Very focused but still creative
-easier to organize my thoughts than usual
-calm/not hyper
-Wasn't distracted by outside stimuli like I usually am
-Logic process seems to be returning

Bad Effects - Dizzy even when sitting
- Coordination was difficult
- No thirst or hunger to the point that I was apathetic toward food. Had to force myself to eat at dinner time and the only liquid I had was milk at breakfast a glass of water 2 hrs later when I took my calcium and another glass of milk at dinner.
-Hand writing was a bit difficult.

Possible Secondary Contributors - I don't think there were any unless you count inspiration.

Coming down - Hard time sleeping again/sleepy but alert. Was so intent on getting that belt done I forgot to check the time.

Thoughts - Today was an extremely good day in that I actually accomplished something. Completing a project from beginning to end without getting so excited abut it that I had to get up and run around or being distracted by other things.

----------------

Day Four 10/29/2010 Friday

Dosage 1 20mg tablet

Good Effects - Better able to concentrate
- No hyperactivity
- Logic process is definitely returning

Bad Effects - Almost as soon as I took it I felt down, out and tired
- I was nervous and worried and shook most of the day
- I was Hyper-concentrating on things to the point that I missed my favorite show because I was still reading an article I had researched, even after I gleaned the information I needed from it, simply because simply because I felt compelled to finish it.
- I had a panic attack half way through the day which lasted for several hours. I was anxious for no reason, felt like I was having cold sweats but wasn't perspiring. Also felt like crying for no reason but no tears came. At one point I was hyperventilating and my heart was pounding so badly that I felt it would be wise to monitor my blood pressure and pulse. Average over several hours was 122/91 with a pulse of 104.
-I had a constant dull pain behind and below my ears in the area of the mastoid process and running a little into my sternoicleido mastoid and gradually including the posterior auricularis and then around the base of the scull following the fuperior Nuchal line. I think it was a tension headache because I caught myself clenching my jaw a few times which is an unusual thing for me to do. that was by far the worst panic attack I have ever had.

Coming Down - Can we say bad? I was still feeling down and anxious but my attention became even more hyper than usual (looking back at this I think I must have meant I became even more hyper than usual) and my distract-ability was through the roof. Even the sound of the central heating system held my cognitive abilities hostage. I'm used to being easily distracted and even used to not being able to concentrate on anything but the distraction, especially if I'm experiencing test anxiety - come to think of it I am exactly that distracted when taking a test. And of course I went to bed late again.

Thoughts - I wonder if the negative effects today were caused by my hardly eating or drinking since I started on the Adderall.

On a side note I took the autism spectrum quotient today and scored a 36 (which is high - most people diagnosed with autism score at least a 32). Don't know if that means anything though as many of the questions could also indicate social anxiety or ADHD.

--------------

Day Five 10/30/2010

Dosage - 1 20mg tablet after breakfast

Good effects - Increased focus
- Logic process getting better
- Increased desire to finish projects
- Creativity still intact
- Calm/not hyperactive

Bad Effects - Headache in the temporal lobes.
- Trouble writing
- Mild Shaking
- Increased heart rate (but not as bad as yesterday)
- Hyper-focus (being able to focus is good but not to the point that it makes it difficult to multitask.)
- Good effects only last a few hours
- No appetite

Coming Down - Much less drastic than yesterday. I simply found my focus beginning to wander gradually and more and more things began to distract me to the point that as I work on this I am spending more time gazing out the window and day-dreaming than I am writing - of course that's normal for me ;)

Thoughts - Forgot to eat throughout the day again.
Finally caught up with this journal.
Sorry about the over descriptiveness of yesterdays bad effects - that's what happens with you give someone as obsessed with facts as I am the ability to focus on one subject at a time.

---------

I need to take a break here - my attention span for this is used up (actually I'm surprised I was able to make myself spend as much time as I have on it at once - not easy spent most of the time fighting the urge to look out the window) and I need to work off a little hyperactivity. I'll come back and continue with days six through fourteen later. Feel free to comment on what I have in so far.

Trevor4sure 12-20-10 04:47 PM

Re: My Adderall Journal (bad experience - 33 year old female)
 
My worst experiance was hearing I did not need a stronger med without even complaining about my symptoms they are the one that noticed it was not working...

aarondev 12-20-10 06:30 PM

Re: My Adderall Journal (bad experience - 33 year old female)
 
A few notes:

1. Great for you for taking such a detailed journal. It will really help in the future months and years for you should you end up switching medicines, needing to take breaks, etc. Hold onto this!

2. Don't worry about the lots of detail for that one day. My only note is that no one aside from your doctor or some of our most learned posters on these forums will either a. know what sections of the body you're referring to when you speak in jargon or b. bother to look it up. So for your note about wanting to be so precise, maybe a way to negotiate with yourself NOT to do that is the goal of being cogent as opposed to exact.

3. It may help for future positing to type up just summaries of how the weeks have gone for you. I say this as you've got about otherwise 50 posts or so left which is really quite something. What's more, a lot of your experience on it will depend on what you're doing with your day. If you want to carry on, go ahead. But if your aim is for feedback being more succinct may help more.

4. Lastly, big impacts on Adderall effects that people report are:
a. Getting a full night's rest
b. Not drinking anything/eating anything with citric acid in it
c. Having it with a meal so as to avoid variability in effects & side-effects

5. Your experience of it WILL be different then some on these forums because you're a girl. Be sure to keep that in mind.

5. What's your age? This certainly makes a difference (when the person is less than 20 or older)

StoicNate 12-20-10 06:43 PM

Re: My Adderall Journal (bad experience - 33 year old female)
 
I think your number 1 problem is that your dose is way too high to be starting with.

Try splitting your tablet in halves so you only have 5mg.

Ask your doctor for a low dose like 5mg or so.

Man, I really don't know what doctors are thinking when they prescribe such big doses from day 1.
Usually patients are started with a low dose and work up to a bigger dose only if needed.

Jester 12-21-10 12:56 AM

Re: My Adderall Journal (bad experience - 33 year old female)
 
Get something without levo stimulants.

That1WierdGirl 12-21-10 04:15 PM

Re: My Adderall Journal (bad experience - 33 year old female)
 
Wow not even half way through and already getting interesting comments.

As for why I am doing this it's more for the benefit of others than myself. I know that it's nice to know that someone else has had the same problems on a drug that you have had.

If I remember right my pdoc put me on such a high dose because she wanted to convince me that I have bipolar mania and not ADHD even though the only criteria I match for it are those which are shared with ADHD but I match all criteria for ADHD inattentive type and six criteria for ADHD hyperactive type. She explained that it would make me hyperactive if she was right. Of course it never did. She eventually took me off it but not for that reason.

So I have a tab bit of an attention span at this time maybe I should continue?

----------------------

Day six 10/31/2010

Dosage 1 20mg tablet after breakfast

Good Effects - feel calm but confident and productive
- Multitasking abilities seem to be returning
- I don't feel like a zombie today

Bad Effects - Abnormal need to blink
- Dizziness and shaking
- Concentration having trouble again
- Procrastination tendencies returning
- Apathy toward food and eating
- Distract-ability returning
- Tired/Groggy after taking even after 8 hrs sleep but not as bad as previously
- headache
- kept forgetting things moments after learning them

Coming down - Hardly noticed it. I guess I found my mind wandering more in the evening than earlier

Thoughts - I had a large breakfast before taking the pill including cereal with milk, hot chocolate, yogurt and dried apricots. I wonder if this may have inhibited the absorption of the pill. Tomorrow I will see what happens if I take it after eating only a few bites as today was mostly like a 'good day' without the medicine (except for the dizziness and shaking, the headache, the apathy toward food and the tiredness/grogginess)

-------------------

Day Seven 11/1/2010

Dosage 1 20mg tablet during breakfast

Good Effects - concentration returning
- I've noticed my patience increasing
- Logic seems to be getting better
- I'm not forgetful like yesterday
- No hyperactive urges
- Desire to prioritize increasing

Bad Effects - Apathy toward food
- Favorite foods taste bad or bland
- Decreased interest in favorite activities
- Moderate depressive state all day
- Hard to make myself write in this journal
- I have a desire to get things done but I don't want to do anything (in a clinically depressed sort of way)
- No creativity
- Not excited for things I should be excited for
- I don't feel like a person today
- Increased sensitivity - i.e. things that normally wouldn't, such as hair and cloths, make my skin itch.
- Blinking but not as bad as yesterday (compulsive blinking)
- Increased heart rate
- Dizzy, uncoordinated and shaky
- Unusual lack of interest in cognitive activities
- Feel 'blah', slowed down and tired but not sleepy
- Slight headache

Coming Down - More of a coming up
- Starting to feel less depressed
- Distract-ability returning
- Interest in learning coming back

Thoughts - "IF THIS IS THE CURE, GIVE ME THE DISEASE!"
-It was great when it was helping me organize my thoughts but today it seemed mainly to slow my brain down to a crawl and make me feel down

-----------------------------

Day Eight 11/2/2010

Dose 1 20mg tablet after breakfast

Good Effects - Need to procrastinate getting less
- Logic processes smoother today than yesterday.
- Easier to multitask

Bad Effects - Pain behind ear again
- Increased heart rate
- Irritable/agitated but not hyper
- Headache
- Pain behind ear as if from clenching jaw
- Jaw feels weird
- Dizzy
- Shaking

Coming Down - Hardly noticed. Hyperactivity returned and irritability, dizziness etc lessened.

Thoughts - Today was an improvement over yesterday but still not great.

Day Nine 11/3/2010

Dose 1 20mb tablet during breakfast

Good Effects - Didn't seem to affect me much at all today
-No more or less hyper today than I usually am (when not on the pill)
-Creativity = so/so but it's returning again
-Urge to procrastinate still less than normal but coming back
-Appetite seems to be returning

Bad Effects - Rapid heart rate
- Dizziness
- Shaking
- Anxious
- Have to fight to keep from clenching jaw

Coming Down - Logic process increased
- Procrastination returned to normal
- More distract-able
- Shaking and dizziness diminished
- Heart beat returned to normal
- Anxiety calmed a bit

Thoughts - Today wasn't too bad. I wonder if I'm getting used to it. I really need to start eating and drinking more. Some of the days I had problems I had hot chocolate with my medicine - I wonder if that had anything to do with it. I had trouble getting to sleep again after it wore off.

----------------

Day Ten 11/4/2010

Dose 1 20mg tablet after breakfast

Good Effects - Focus is good
- Little to no hyperactivity
- Appetite returning
- Logic processes getting better

Bad Effects - Weird twitch in my lungs making me hyperventilate.
- Tightness in chest (seems to be caused by above)
- Rapid heart rate
- Tense
- Headache though not as bad as usual
- Vocal ticks (grunting)
- Head bobbing

Coming down - (there was no entry here. If I remember right it was because my inattentiveness returned with a vengeance and I completely forgot to finish the entry for this day

----------------------------------

Days Eleven through Thirteen 11/5/2010 - 11/8/2010

Dosage 1 20mg tablet each day either during or after breakfast

There are no entries on these days. However as I recall the depression had me floored so much that I didn't want to do anything, felt myself completely worthless and so on. Then after it wore off my ADHD returned with such a vengeance that I either forgot to write in the journal or just blew it off to do something that I thought was more fun. I also remember that I had problems with ticking behaviors, grogginess after taking and trouble getting to sleep at night after it wore off. But as usual once I did fall asleep I was able to fall asleep for a full 8 hrs without interruption.

It should be noted that the depression I felt while I was on this drug was worse than anything I have ever experienced in my life - even during my rather emotional teenage years. On this drug I actually was clinically depressed (though thankfully I was never suicidal) for the first time ever. That was the scariest feeling I have ever had and I never want to feel like that again. I have a new appreciation for people who suffer from depression after this.

------------------------------

Day Fourteen 11/8/2010

Dose - 1 20mg tablet after breakfast

Good Effects - So I forgot to do this the last 3 days. I will try to put for them as well. Yes in fact the last sentence did have terrible grammar.
-The only good effect I can think of at this time is that I am no longer having headaches all the time and I don't get dizzy quite so much.

Bad Effects - Sleep problems
- Poor Appetite
- Mild Ticking
- Increased anxiety
- Rapid Heart Rate
- No longer helps with desire to procrastinate (ie it no longer controls/prevents it)
- No longer helps with speed of talking
- Does not help me concentrate at all anymore

Thoughts - I am worried that I may be building a tolerance to this medication.

-------------------------------

Conclusion

As you might have guessed I almost refused to take it on several occasions during those two weeks of torture but I persevered because I was hoping it would get better.

My doctor did take me off of it but only because of the ticks. I think if she had told me to continue I would have refused. By then I had had enough of the depression, the ticking, the heart palpitations, the grogginess, the feeling of being a zombie and other things that it did to me that if this was the only thing out there to help me with this I would have just lived with the ADHD uncontrolled - it was better than feeling like that.

Also later my doctor said 'I don't think you have ADHD because of how you reacted to that medication. I really think you have bipolar disorder' (not her exact words but as close as I can remember).

My response was 'but it controlled my hyperactivity at least at first'.

To which she replied 'yes but with some people it's different.'

My reply was "You mean that if it had made me more hyper that would have meant that I didn't have ADHD but that if it didn't that would still mean I don't have ADHD? That doesn't make sense."

Her "with the way coffee makes you hyper that means you don't have ADHD"

Me "Coffee, I mean caffeine because I don't drink coffee, doesn't make me hyper - it never has and I never said that it did."

Again not word for word but as close as I can remember.

After this she put me on Lamotrigine - I'll put my experience with that in the section for it. It won't be as detailed because it didn't control my procrastination like Adderall did.

ADHDTigger 12-21-10 04:27 PM

Re: My Adderall Journal (bad experience - 33 year old female)
 
Dear, is seeing a different pdoc for a second opinion something that you would consider or an option open to you?

Someone who specializes in ADHD can generally tell the difference between ADHD and BiPolar. I have a BiPolar sister and I have ADHD. Her doc is absolutely certain that her problem is BiPolar and not ADHD because he specializes in both and has no problem with telling you exactly why she is one and not the other.

I have known plenty of docs who simply do not believe that it is possible to have ADHD past a certain age. I have been diagnosed with depression (I'm not) because of significant life events. In short, the pdoc could be absolutely wrong.

I have taken both Ritalin and Adderall. Ritalin works significantly better for me.

I love your detailed journal and wish that others beginning a new medication would keep something similar.

That1WierdGirl 12-22-10 03:09 AM

Re: My Adderall Journal (bad experience - 33 year old female)
 
Sorry this took so long to write - so many distractions :D


I will be seeing a therapist next month I am hoping to get them to give me the evaluation that diagnosed me as ADHD 3 years ago again.

Because stimulants seem to bring out evidence of Tourette Syndrome in me I will not be taking them again. Unfortunately that means Ritalin is an impossibility for me as well.

I know that ADHD and Bipolar are similar. What worries me is that my pdoc decided I probably had Bipolar disorder and not ADD based on having known me for only a few minutes using the following criteria

1. Chronic Forgetfulness - she said this was a symptom of Bipolar Disorder and not ADHD. However the DSM IV clearly lists Chronic Forgetfulness as a symptom of ADHD inattentive type.

2. Mood Swings - Again a criteria of both ADHD and bi-polar however according to the DSM iv bipolar mood swings do not have a trigger and happen randomly while ADHD mood swings always have a trigger. All my mood swings have a trigger even if others don't see it.

3. My Pdoc thought I was having a maniac episode when she first met me. However I later looked up the DSM iv criteria for a manic episode and I had never had an episode that even slightly matched that. In fact at that time if I were much less happy I would be pushing borderline depression. In fact it was not until they tried me on mood stabilizers that I experienced my first episode of Mania ever.

I am staying with her because she is still treating me as if I might have ADHD - right now she's trying me on Startera and advised me to take Omega3 fish oil as well.

aarondev 12-22-10 04:54 AM

Re: My Adderall Journal (bad experience - 33 year old female)
 
That1WeirdGirl,

Read 'em all. Here is what I can offer:

Tigger is correct - speaking to a second opinion is worthwhile. Just to get corroborating evidence. All self-help literature on ADHD/ADD says its a disease that you have to come to learn more and more. Its not something you can be passive with. Treatment is much like a partnership since so much depends on symptoms reported.

In terms of what side-effects you do describe, I can relate. The clenching of the jaw, the depression, the distractabilty, and the anxiety are/were all there for me. It should be noted that I, too, have had it suggested to me that I may be bipolar (bipolar 2, in my case). Its a diagnosis I've strongly resisted since the science for it for me is incumbent on a genetic condition I have they don't full understand.

Anyway, by your post, it looks like you're now off of the Lamictal, too? Have you talked to your current doctor about starting an ADD drug called Strattera? This is said to help some with the symptoms of ADD and its primary negative side-effect - ED - obviously doesn't apply to you.

All in all, it honestly sounds like a pretty weak diagnosis. I don't know that its NOT conclusive but I haven't heard it (for friends or in my reading) that the reaction to coffee can be a parallel test for someone who has mental health issues. Hopefully you're doing some reading on your own.

Either way, thanks for writing up your journal. It was indeed very helpful to be able to see so much in detail. I don't know that I'd be able to be so extensive, distinct and detailed had I done one myself.

aarondev 12-22-10 05:01 AM

Re: My Adderall Journal (bad experience - 33 year old female)
 
Just read last post.

May I ask what sort of reaction you had in your Manic episode? Was this in response to the mood stabilizer that the doctor put you on?

Its good that you're being so diligent with the diagnosis. There's a tendency for hubris for anyone (med student, family, patient or otherwise) upon reading the criteria for the DSM. So try and have somewhat of an open mind. Although I'd imagine after the manic episode you're about as willing as that as...

Is it possible that instead of manic characteristics you were displaying they were instead perhaps Hypomanic? However, if your pdoc is getting confused that would, if I were you, erode my confidence in here.

Strattera, as aforementioned, is hopefully sound. Just watch out for drowziness and try and have patience. Typically takes 1 week to notice any changes, 3 weeks to notice a significant one, 6 weeks for consistent side-effects to go away, and ten for optimum dose to be reached. The Strattera forum is extensive, too.

That1WierdGirl 12-22-10 06:08 PM

Re: My Adderall Journal (bad experience - 33 year old female)
 
Thank you all for your helpful responses (ADDTiger and Aarondev I gave you both a thanks).

I too am glad I was able to keep such a detailed meds journal for this - however unfortunately it is not something I would normally have done. Being on the Adderall is the only explanation I can think of for being organized mentally enough to even have started that thing. I certainly haven't been able to get myself to do it for any other meds.

I am in fact on Strattera at this time but I've only been on it for two weeks. I haven't noticed any change yet but I've been told it could take as long as six weeks. I have also been taking omega3 fish oil for 1 week and have seen a definite positive outcome from that. Only time will tell with that.

Yes the episode happened while I was on the mood stabilizer and yes you are correct that it would be better defined as hypomania since it only lasted the 5 days that I was on the mood stabilizer.

The mania (sorry hypomania) symptoms I experienced while on the mood stabilizer were.

  • inflated self-esteem or grandiosity
  • decreased need for sleep
  • more talkative than usual
  • increase in psychomotor agitation
  • persistently elevated mood
Since I know that the DSM Iv states that "Episodes of Substance-Induced Mood Disorder (due to the direct effects of a medication, or other somatic treatments for depression, a drug of abuse, or toxin exposure) or of Mood Disorder Due to a General Medical Condition do not count toward a diagnosis of Bipolar I Disorder" (http://www.fortunecity.com/campus/ps...gy/781/dsm.htm) I do not count the fact that I had my one and only such episode while on the mood stabilizer as evidence that I might have bipolar disorder.

I can guarantee you there is no hubris on my part regarding my disagreement with the diagnosis of bipolar disorder. Actually I was rather disappointed when I realized that I didn't match enough criteria for it. Actually the only criteria that I actually match overlap into ADHD criteria.

Funny now that I think about it - I experienced my first episode of clinical depression while on the Adderall and my first Mania like episode while on the mood stabilizer.

As for a second opinion - I am currently unemployed due to having lost my job because I started a fight (I was PMSing and stressed out over the way they had increased the micromanaging policies and my ADHD was not being treated because I was sort of in denial that it needed to be treated at the time). So for now I am stuck with what I can get. Maybe one day I'll be able to get something better. Funny thing is I don't usually do things like that - I'm usually like a duck when it comes to being teased.

The doctor who originally diagnosed me said I had ADHD combined type and anxiety. I agree with him since I match all criteria for inattentive type, six criteria for Hyperactive type and all the criteria for general anxiety disorder. It has also been suggested that I get tested for Asbergers but I can't afford it at this time.

As for the drowsiness caused by the Strattera I've been taking it at dinner so that has actually been a good thing.

And I'm starting to ramble again...

GonZo025 12-23-10 04:04 PM

Re: My Adderall Journal (bad experience - 33 year old female)
 
This is my experience with Adderall so far. 42 year old male.

I started Adderall xr 15 a couple weeks ago. i was already in a state of anxiety and depression from an injury, inability to work, no financial safetynet etc.. etc.. along with an increase in the ADHD symptoms.

Day 1. moments of clarity.

Day 2. mass confusion and tension.

Day 3. felt like I was relearning how to think and process information. Noticed my habitual leg or foot twitch was gone. It does come back in the evening or under high levels of stress/anxiety.

Day 4. blew up from a "being late" anxiety trying to find my counselor's second office. very tense. Later in the afternoon had moment of calmness unlike any I can remember. It was wonderful if only for 30 minutes or so.

Day 5. entire body and mind relaxed. thinking was a lot clearer. Still kind of in spikes. seemed to wear off around 3-4 pm, approx 8 hours. depression deepened some and was more stable. Partially from being able to "see" so much about my life and mistakes etc. Some depression was already present and I think it was being occasionally suppressed by the ADHD.

Day 6. able to write about my feelings etc.. kind of journalling I guess. Something I have never been able to do. My brain always ran faster than my writing and I could never get back to what I was writing.

In the process I have begun noticing clutter more. No idea were to start on it but I see it. I have not lost my keys in over two weeks. I catch myself getting sidetracked. Can't always get back on track but I can see it so I can work on it.

I have struggled for years trying to learn guitar. I noticed a drastic change in focus when I picked it up the other night. Only lasted 15 minutes or so. I was so tuned in I could "feel" what I was doing and did not get sidetracked or fall into doing the same thing over and over. I may need to relearn how to learn as well.

I also notice a big change in reading. I was able to read for almost an hour and not get sidetracked by stray thoughts. They did pop up occasionally but it was easy to go back to the book.

I still can't find the word I am needing to use at times. example, I just could not find "eclipse" when asking a friend if he watched it. This is a big problem I have had.

I am remembering a lot about my childhood and life. Memory feels a little better, sadly not a lot of positive memories. A lot of this may have been suppressed by self medicating. Also a cause for some depression.

Along the way, my overactive negative internal judge has quieted some. Time to try to get back to positive.

Sleeping has not been any more of a problem than before. The Adderall does make me a bit tired. That is not quite correct. Maybe a bit less antzy and wired, or something. My system has always worked backwards with stimulants though. Give me 'downers' to help me sleep and I will be up all night and then some.

Having to really pay attention to food. I go to the gym and this stuff killed my apatite. I have ran out of energy a few times due to not eating. Should not be a problem dropping that last 10 lbs now. :D

I started on 20mg Xr today along with an antidepressant. I hope to be off the antidepressant soon.

notsoplainJane 12-23-10 11:12 PM

Re: My Adderall Journal (bad experience - 33 year old female)
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by StoicNate (Post 986447)
I think your number 1 problem is that your dose is way too high to be starting with.

That was my first thought. My Dr said 10mg was the starting dose for an adult. So far, that has worked well for me in the morning -- just enough but not too much. I'll admit that one afternoon I doubled the dose to 20mg and it acted exactly like a stimulant should; it stimulated me, which didn't help me in the least.

That1WierdGirl 12-23-10 11:29 PM

Re: My Adderall Journal (bad experience - 33 year old female)
 
Quote:

That was my first thought. My Dr said 10mg was the starting dose for an adult. So far, that has worked well for me in the morning -- just enough but not too much. I'll admit that one afternoon I doubled the dose to 20mg and it acted exactly like a stimulant should; it stimulated me, which didn't help me in the least.
Hmm, well it definitely did not stimulate me. As you can tell from my journal it actually did the exact opposite - unless you count the two or three days that I was actually able to prioritize and the hyper-concentration but even then it worked more like a downer than anything else for me.

In any case my pdoc and I have decided that because of the ticks I should not try any more stimulant drugs.

notsoplainJane 12-23-10 11:36 PM

Re: My Adderall Journal (bad experience - 33 year old female)
 
Do you know why your Dr began your dosage at twice the starting rate?


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