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-   -   Finally catching up with me- Close to losing job (http://www.addforums.com/forums/showthread.php?t=188881)

CelesteyD 11-12-17 09:35 AM

Finally catching up with me- Close to losing job
 
Well, it has finally happened. I have messed-up at work so, so badly that they probably should have fired me on Friday. According to my supervisor, manager, and their manager, I am doing so poorly at building relationships with my customers and colleagues that they complained to a divisional manager about me.

For context, I work in a customer service department for a large manufacturer. I have a set territory and they send their orders daily (data entry, order management). A huge part of the job is inbound calls. I take about 35-50 per day primarily for my territory and the person I back up. My team of 14 handles a very demanding product line so our calls are very frequent and urgent. We all get overflow calls from other territories when their reps are signed-off the phone or on the phone with other calls.

Not one of my customers is happy with me. The 3-4 salesmen I deal with on a daily basis are not happy with me. The divisional manager came in person to my office and spoke with my supervisor and manager. He wants a new customer service rep. The customer service manager is not ready to do that. She is giving me a chance to "turn it around". She cited what I said in my interview a year ago when I told her that I love to be busy and I love a fast-paced office. She wants to know what happened to that and why I told her that if I am struggling in that exact same environment. I told her that I am not used to the volume of calls. Honestly, I don't remember talking about the call volume in my 2 interviews last year. I was used to maybe 5-10 a day in my previous position. She asked me if I was happy and I said "no- how can I be happy when I know I am not doing a good job?". She seemed shocked at that.

As we all know with ADD- there are things that end up being our Achilles Heel. The phone is mine. Every.Single.Time my phone rings I am set-back so far in my progress with what I am doing. It is so hard to get back on task and remember what needs to be done. Many calls are "gotta do this right now- forget what you're doing right now- my problem is bigger and more important". So then, what do I do? Let the customer dictate my priorities or do I handle them on my own in my own order? I am guaranteed to forget about something when there are things piling up. For me it's so hard. I am better with minimal phone calls.

Additionally, there is an expectation of me to "wine and dine" sales and customers in my territory. Not actually taking them out to dinner- but the treatment needs to be very "yes Sir- I'll do what you need immediately no matter what I'm doing now Sir". I'm expected to treat the salesmen that work for the same company like gold. They expect to be treated like gold. My manager said they expect and deserve "A1" treatment.

The customers in my territory are very needy and demanding and they don't feel like I care about them. They don't like my lack of immediate response to their emails. Sales doesn't like that I take too long to respond, either. I am so bogged down with all of the processes and required tasks, plus the phone, plus the emails, that I feel so overwhelmed by everything. So I don't respond right away because I "will get to it later". There are certain tasks that I procrastinate on (Quotes- ugh) and that is not acceptable.

I was never really told that this is how sales/customers expected to be treated by me so I approached them like I would in my previous position which was like "we work together, we respect each other, we will get this done". Not "Yes sir- whatever you want sir- I'll make you my first priority above all else sir". I feel it is kind of sexist (my company is very good ol' boy- male dominated culture). Maybe that is why I feel so icky about it? Per my manager, I need to "Kiss their You know what". That is not how I am. I don't like kissing up to people. It feels so fake and inauthentic. But I'll have to fake it for the time being. Kind of like being an actress! Yay! A new skill :rolleyes:

It doesn't help that I feel like I've checked out of this job already. The commute is brutal and they are only willing to change my start time to later rather than earlier which won't work since I already get to the daycare to pick up my child at closing time with my schedule now. I was planning on leaving shortly after Christmas anyway. It is just not a good fit for me. So my bad for checking out- I didn't realize it would actually be obvious in my work. I do deserve the criticism but I don't like being made to feel like I should have known certain things without being told. My ADD and this type of job are not a good mix.

In my last position, I was successful. Customers liked me. Sales liked me. The environment was different. Sometimes I wish I never left. But they were purchased by a big industry leader and now it's much different and super corporate. Robotic in nature, and so much red tape it's ridiculous. Perhaps it is the corporate environment that I need to avoid?

Not sure what I'm really asking for here but I needed to get this out. I'm struggling. I'll do what they want (as much as I just want to tell them I'm done). I need a job until I find a new one. It's only been 10 months here and I am crashing and burning like I never imagined.

Oh, and yes- I'm going to get back to a treatment plan. It's getting worse as I age (almost 40). I see the manifestations of the worsening of the ADD everywhere I go. It's scary how fast I'm plummeting. Piles of paper everywhere. Dishes everywhere. Unfinished projects, laundry, good intentions, everywhere. I'm at a loss. It's so embarrassing. I can't have unexpected visitors because of my mess.

Thanks for reading guys. I'm up for any suggestions or critiques. Maybe even career paths that are ADD (Inattentive type) friendly?

-CelesteyD

stef 11-12-17 11:03 AM

Re: Finally catching up with me- Close to losing job
 
I can't say for your career, but goodness yes, get treatment.
I am recently diagnosed and it totally changed everything at work for me ( i work as an assistant in a law firm, and wile my job wasn't on the line, I was constantly making mistakes and I was paralyzed with anxiety).

I just reread your post and you seem suited for sales but in a better enviornment.
even corporate though can be ok, if your direct bosses are decent.

Curmudgeon 11-12-17 07:05 PM

Re: Finally catching up with me- Close to losing job
 
CelesteyD: my hat's off to you for making it through that work environment for 10 months! I couldn't have done it and would likely have quit or been fired within 10 DAYS.

From what you wrote, I suspect that your current job is one you are not well suited for: too many moving parts; the need to shift your total focus (a major weakness for many of us ADD'ers) almost instantaneously from one task or person to another...to another...to another... in quick succession; having to kiss up to the "important people" and create relationships with others who you know couldn't care less about you as a person; and finally, management that is not supportive and that looks at you as just a cog in the machine.

From your post, it sounds like you came from a much lower sales/call volume job where you had time to shift your focus from task to task, and you didn't have the same kind of pressure from management to achieve a certain level of production in your daily workload.

My advice is this: get your ADHD treatment plan nailed down ASAP. If you are on a company-provided insurance plan, it'll be better to get on this now, before you get fired and lose your insurance (if that is indeed about to happen). Also, look into having a chat with human resources to see if there are any temporary accommodations that can be made for you. Maybe there aren't, but at this point you probably won't lose anything more by asking. Some companies have what are called PIPs--Performance Improvement Plan(s), which enable you to stay employed while they work with you on improving your performance. This could give you some breathing room to use your company-provided medical insurance to get to the doctor for your ADHD.

Best of luck to you!

CelesteyD 11-12-17 10:22 PM

Re: Finally catching up with me- Close to losing job
 
Thank you Stef and Curmudgeon. The treatment plan is a very high priority right now. I have a call into a specialist and Iíll call a few others tomorrow. Itís crazt how things have gotten worse so quickly. I used to be able to manage my ADD but itís now a problem that needs urgent attention. Could it be my age or stress? Maybe hormones (Iím peri-menopausal). Who knows? Itís a concern nonetheless.

Iím looking for an environment similar to my old position in how it
was structured. Iíd love to get out of customer service all together into something less ďfront lineĒ and more ďback officeĒ.

I was a buyer in retail and that was a good fit. Also looking for something in that area. Stef-I havenít looked into sales yet. Maybe when Iím able to take a risk on my income. It seems stimulating and exciting.

Curmudgeon- you hit the nail on the head. There are way too many moving parts. There is no time to finish things (in my experience). Itís stressful every time the phone rings. Now l have to pretend everything is ok knowing my customers and sales colleagues are unhappy with me and want someone else.

I wanted to leave within 3 months. Training took 6 weeks so after that and then being on the floor-I found myself wishing i stayed at my old job. Honestly, one of the reasons l am struggling is because deep down I believe I checked out. Well, itís time to check back in and adjust my attitude until I leave.

Thanks again!

sarahsweets 11-13-17 05:03 AM

Re: Finally catching up with me- Close to losing job
 
What was your old treatment plan like?

Quote:

Originally Posted by CelesteyD (Post 1972538)
Thank you Stef and Curmudgeon. The treatment plan is a very high priority right now. I have a call into a specialist and Iíll call a few others tomorrow. Itís crazt how things have gotten worse so quickly. I used to be able to manage my ADD but itís now a problem that needs urgent attention. Could it be my age or stress? Maybe hormones (Iím peri-menopausal). Who knows? Itís a concern nonetheless.

Iím looking for an environment similar to my old position in how it
was structured. Iíd love to get out of customer service all together into something less ďfront lineĒ and more ďback officeĒ.

I was a buyer in retail and that was a good fit. Also looking for something in that area. Stef-I havenít looked into sales yet. Maybe when Iím able to take a risk on my income. It seems stimulating and exciting.

Curmudgeon- you hit the nail on the head. There are way too many moving parts. There is no time to finish things (in my experience). Itís stressful every time the phone rings. Now l have to pretend everything is ok knowing my customers and sales colleagues are unhappy with me and want someone else.

I wanted to leave within 3 months. Training took 6 weeks so after that and then being on the floor-I found myself wishing i stayed at my old job. Honestly, one of the reasons l am struggling is because deep down I believe I checked out. Well, itís time to check back in and adjust my attitude until I leave.

Thanks again!


CelesteyD 11-13-17 06:28 AM

Re: Finally catching up with me- Close to losing job
 
It was a long time ago 12-13 years. Just Adderall. Then I switched doctors and went on Concerta. Adderall worked but I had heart palpitations and extreme muscle fatigue. Also, my appetite was reduced to nothing. Lost 20 lbs (baby weight yay!) I didnít see what others saw in my weight loss. It scared me that I thought I wasnít as thin as they saw and worried that it could turn into an issue with being addicted to weight loss. So I stopped. Then Concerta made me so irritable and Angry. It didnít help much with the ADD for me. I went off and that was that.

My symptoms were well managed without meds until recently. ....maybe not well managed but I never had problems at work with my performance. :(

sarahsweets 11-13-17 08:35 AM

Re: Finally catching up with me- Close to losing job
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by CelesteyD (Post 1972601)
It was a long time ago 12-13 years. Just Adderall. Then I switched doctors and went on Concerta. Adderall worked but I had heart palpitations and extreme muscle fatigue. Also, my appetite was reduced to nothing. Lost 20 lbs (baby weight yay!) I didnít see what others saw in my weight loss. It scared me that I thought I wasnít as thin as they saw and worried that it could turn into an issue with being addicted to weight loss. So I stopped.

Did you know they prescribe vyvanse for binge eating disorder too? I mention that not because you need that kind of assistance but maybe some parts of the brain that are targeted for the mental obsession or urges would be the same for you and your concerns with weight loss? Also in regards to adderall, sometimes taking a small dose of clonidine can level things out. It happens to be a BP med but its also approved for adhd. As far as appetite, if you can stick it out and force yourself to eat frequently like every two hours- the appetite suppression can go away. But this would only be if adderall used to be very helpful.

Quote:


My symptoms were well managed without meds until recently. ....maybe not well managed but I never had problems at work with my performance. :(
The symptoms of adhd can be very unmangable outside of work and create the same kind of chaos and frenzy. Many people with adhd succeed really well in one area like work or school but are majorly impaired at home and elsewhere. Just something to think about.
Quote:

Then Concerta made me so irritable and Angry. It didnít help much with the ADD for me. I went off and that was that.
many people will have success with an amphetamine but have terrible luck with methylphenidate which is the class that Concerta is in.
I know for me, ritalin wreaked havoc with my moods.

Jacksper 11-13-17 08:49 AM

Re: Finally catching up with me- Close to losing job
 
Sorry to hear that you are struggling so much.

Can you talk to someone who is willing to make some changes? Sounds like you *can* actually function well if you don't have as much phone calls all the time. Perhaps it's a win-win if you switch to a position where you can do something that fits with you better.

Everyone benefits if you can do work that requires using your strengths instead of your weaknesses.

CelesteyD 11-14-17 07:47 AM

Re: Finally catching up with me- Close to losing job
 
Thank you sarahsweets and Jacksper.

I'll talk to my doctor (once I can get into an appointment) about all that is available to me. Totally avoiding Concerta. Never want to feel like that again!
Adderall worked. Amazingly well. I actually took legible, useful notes at a seminar and I was able to retain info and keep my attention levels high. It was exactly what I was missing in school as a kid! Such a strange feeling because I am used to my mind just wandering off into wherever when I am at a seminar.

Jacksper- Since the job is primarily phones, then order entry- I can't really have them change that. Had I known how much I'd be on the phone at this job I would have declined the offer. They don't want to call themselves a call center because they have calls routed directly to the assigned reps but we all get a lot of "spill over" calls that don't fall into our territories. They have all kinds of metrics on phone call data (number of calls, number of missed calls, number of abandoned calls, etc.) and I feel like if they are measuring that kind of stuff, they are indeed a call center. But they beg to differ. So that's where we are. I'll be looking to leave that position ASAP.

Thanks again everyone!

CelesteyD

allesandro1 11-29-17 05:40 AM

Re: Finally catching up with me- Close to losing job
 
Hey CelesteyD,
Well, I've certainly had jobs like that before. They suck. The thing is you have to do things in a way that works for you.I mean if you have ten calls all from people who want immediate service, how can you possibly do that? I would think you would have to write a note about this stuff and then proceed to work on one issue at a time. That being said, I have a friend who works for a law firm who says the same thing about the attorneys she works for. She says their is a priority list for these people though, the top attorneys get taken care of first. If you have certain sales people who are prima donnas likely to complain, make them a priority.
But with everyone else, I would just make a note and service them in order. That being said, yes it does sound like their is a sexist tone to your office. If you did this job successfully in the past I would say you really need to plug away at finding another environment to work in or at least another type of job in which you utilize the same skills that made you successful in your last job. Read Barbara Sherr's, I Could Do Anything If Only I Knew What It Was'


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