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-   -   AD(H)D Families Overwhelmed With Emotional Distresses (part one) (http://www.addforums.com/forums/showthread.php?t=191623)

mildadhd 05-11-18 06:31 PM

AD(H)D Families Overwhelmed With Emotional Distresses (part one)
 
My mother recently visited from far away, and i had a chance to ask my mother why she did not seem interested in learning more about the origins of AD(H)D and the emotional distresses that I experienced living with AD(H)D.

And what I learned was that she had so many types of social emotional distresses in her own life, and that she was already overwhelmed with social emotional distresses and sadly she simply did not have the capacity to deal with any more emotional distresses.

Are there any other AD(H)D families that are simply overwhelmed with life's social emotional distresses to properly address origin and treatment of AD(H)D?



M

psychopathetic 05-11-18 07:28 PM

Re: AD(H)D Families Overwhelmed With Emotional Distresses (part one)
 
My family (me my mom (who's since passed) my dad and my sister) had were/are an extremely dysfunctional family filled with our own personal issues that get in the way of progress.

But that aside...I'm just here to give ya a e-(((hug))) if you'll take it. I've been quite rude/confrontational with you so I understand if you don't.
But...I don't know...you and your mom and all the pain there and all the dysfunction...it's something I can relate to, and it's just something that I feel a lot of empathy for you for.
I feel sad too that your mom isn't able to be there for you in the ways you need from her (learning more about adhd and the origins). :(

(((((((Mild)))))))

Was her visit a good one? You don't have to answer that obviously...but I really do hope it was a good one for the most part.

As foul as our relationship got at times...I miss my mom completely.

mildadhd 05-13-18 05:06 AM

Re: AD(H)D Families Overwhelmed With Emotional Distresses (part one)
 
Thanks psychopathetic

Yes it was nice to see my mother and also partially deal with the questions I had on my mind.

It is tuff when she lives so far away, and I worry that she is getting older and I will maybe not see her again.

I certainly do not blame my mother for already being chronically distressed.

What I learned was that my mother is so socially emotionally distressed already that she simply does not have the capacity to deal with anymore distressful topics.

It is normal for the neocortex to "shut down" when emotionally distressed, especially chronically emotionally distressed.

So I am going to have to figure out how to deal with these topics in different ways.

It helps me to know that my mom really does care, but the problem is that the topics overwhelm her.



M

mildadhd 05-13-18 05:23 AM

Re: AD(H)D Families Overwhelmed With Emotional Distresses (part one)
 
I also did not realize how much my mother was socially emotionally distressed and I hope to try to keep in contact with her more and hopefully maybe help ease her own distresses a little.

We also talked about using the Internet technology to keep in touch, and communicate more often, etc..








M

Lunacie 05-13-18 10:40 AM

Re: AD(H)D Families Overwhelmed With Emotional Distresses (part one)
 
Mild, it sounds like your mother may be my age or older.

There were no diagnoses for our disorders when we were raising children.

There was certainly no treatment or help available.


I knew something was wrong with me, different about me, didn't know what.

I didn't notice any symptoms in my daughter until after her second miscarriage
when she slid into depression that she has struggled with off and on ever since.

There is so much more information available now that once we had a clue
where to look first, both my daughter and I learned as much as we could
about adhd and autism and depression and anxiety.

But that doesn't mean we knew what to do to help my grandkids.
We've just been muddling along for the last 15 years, doing the best we can.


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