Feel like nobody will like me....
 

Who wants someone with ADD? Someone who can't remember things & has a difficult time explaining or recalling words.
Someone who has a deformed face too... In high school I always hid one side of my face because of how deformed it appears.
Look how ugly I look in some of the pictures. It sucks that I can't just be a normal person without ADD. How will I ever get a girlfriend with an ugly face on one side & word recalling problems. It makes me appear unconfident.


http://i432.photobucket.com/albums/q...4/594f1534.jpg

Look at my face it looks deformed & my head is a little flat on this side
http://i432.photobucket.com/albums/q...4/da22a475.jpg

Deformed
http://i432.photobucket.com/albums/q...4/3acc77b2.jpg

http://i432.photobucket.com/albums/q...4/7a254fc0.jpg

Re: Feel like nobody will like me....
 

I honestly can't see anything wrong with your face. Seriously, I can't even tell which side you're talking about - they both look fine. The vast majority of people have some asymmetry - those who don't are freaks of nature who make millions as supermodels. If that's what you're talking about, then you're looking very hard to see it, because, again, I don't see anything except a perfectly normal looking, actually more on the good looking side, young man with balanced features and a nice smile.

Have you been feeling this way about your appearance for a long time? I found that my ADD symptoms really took a toll on my self esteem.

Re: Feel like nobody will like me....
 

Honey you're gorgeous.

Want deformed? Messed up? Washed up? Depleted? Watch Jerry Springer.

Honestly don't rush for love/relationship.

I love my hubby and my child. But man it's work and a pain in the *** somedays. Enjoy life. I thought EXACTLY as you did in high school. I actually thought I'd be alone forever - though I was happy about it. I saw other girls blubbering about break ups and drama and wanted no part of it. Out of no where I fell in love and been with my one and only boy friend now Husband nearly nine years. Love/relationships will find you. Live and love life for now.

Re: Feel like nobody will like me....
 

You don't have a deformed face ya silly kook. I see you had a bad hair day but that's nothing to worry about.

You sound like you suffer from extreme self consciousness, and think others are thinking bad things. Really they aren't, people are self absorbed, they think of themselves mostly. Think about how much time you think about other people, do you direct how they look, do you weigh out their quirks? Probably not.

Start examining these thought critically, don't just swallow them. You can very coldly just look at them.

Re: Feel like nobody will like me....
 

We are our own worst critics and our energy goes where our mind flows.

Negative self-talk is a daily battle in my head, and it puts up one he!! of a fight......even on the really good days.

You gotta work on loving your handsome self first. It isn't easy to figure out, but it's possible. It had to come from the inside out. I failed with trying to soothe the savage beast from the outside in by seeking approval from others and trying to be "normal".

Genuine, loving people value more than just superficial aspects of other people.

Start sendin' out some positive, "Oh yes I am "all that" and a bag of chips!!!" vibes :D

Re: Feel like nobody will like me....
 

I believe that doll in the background has more of a deformed face than you. Haha. I think it's pretty cool that you're alike me though. I suck at explaining things verbally, and I struggle with recalling words as well. Also, the back of my head is deformed.; I look good in the front, and retarded from the back. However, that won't stop you or me from getting girls; they hardly care about your appearance, that's just for easy ice breakers. What type of girl do you really want in your life; one you can converse with, or shallow eye-candy?

If you're really like me, than you're typing is much better than your speaking; so get a number and TEXT LIKE A MOFO! Honestly, you can have a girl fall in-love with you before you meet her. Texting is personality only, so when they see you they're already fond of you, therefore, don't care about what you see in the mirror (what you see is usually not what others see). Also, when you fancy somebody -including yourself- you appear much more attractive to that person, especially when you smile. So don't be afraid to smile and start texting. Utilize your strengths.

Oh yeah, tip to texting girls. Make it known that you want to get to know them better quickly; you end up texting the same (no awkwardness happens), but the girl will label you in potential BF material, rather then the dreaded Friendzone.

Re: Feel like nobody will like me....
 

Darkp, you look perfectly OK to me. I don't see why you think something could be off.

I think stemstep has a good point. Visual first impressions can really lead people astray and sometimes make us miss out on the most amazing people.

Its so much better to establish some kind of written communication first, be that by text, Email or chat. Then you won't be distracted by the visual impressions. For me even the phone works to my disadvantage because I am dreadfully bad with it.

Re: Feel like nobody will like me....
 

Hello gorgeous!

Re: Feel like nobody will like me....
 

Like the others have said, I can't see any deformity and I looked really closely. You are a good looking bloke and appearance won't keep you from finding a girl. Your lack of self confidence doesn't have anything to do with your face really but rather your distorted view of yourself. (Trust me on this please, I suffer from a lack of self esteem and I see flaws and problems in myself that others just don't see. On the contrary. And it seems like the flaws that they do see doesn't really make me any less attractive though I always find that difficult to believe. We are our own worst critics.)

Anyway, most women, especially as you get a bit older, really don't care about your looks. Of all the things we look for in a guy, the way he looks is the least important. I know it sounds cliched but beauty really does lie in the eyes of the beholder. If someone likes you, you will look good to them.

I also don't think that your inability to recall words at times should be a big problem. Again, I don't think that all girls really look for a smooth talker. In fact, smooth talkers tend to annoy me a bit and they can sometimes come across as rather insincere. I'd much rather talk to someone who appears to think about his words and I really wouldn't care if he stutters or sometimes forgets words. A little bit of shyness and awkwardness can be actually quite endearing.

ADHD can interfere with a relationship but it doesn't have to be a deal breaker. You can usually find ways to overcome or at least mitigate the effect of your specific problems though it helps if your partner is understanding, patient and tolerant.

The idea of texting is a good one. I struggle to think on my feet so I much prefer to text or e-mail when I can take a bit of time to think about my words.

Re: Feel like nobody will like me....
 

Mate the only thing wrong with you is that hairdo. Nothing a trip to the barber cant fix tho.

I cannot see anything deformed about you at all. Trust me Im an expert at spotting someones flaws and ragging on them about it.

I do thesame things as you are doing. Pick something I dont like about myself and obssess about it to the point of thinking it makes me the ugliest ****er around. Its just low self esteem.

Re: Feel like nobody will like me....
 

There is nothing wrong with you, you are perfectly normal looking. I cant see any deformity....what do you see on yourself that you think is a deformity?

Re: Feel like nobody will like me....
 

Hello! First I want to say how brave I think you are for posting this. Like so many other have said, we all have "flaws" that sap our self confidence, you are very brave for talking about it and letting others help you out! I agree with everyone else, I don't see any "deformity", you look like a totally normal guy! Whatever normal is!

I was raised to believe that I had to be thin, quiet, agreeable, have perfectly groomed hair and makeup and wear flattering clothes at all times if I wanted people to like and accept me. Exhausting! I didn't even realize I had internalized these beliefs because intellectually I knew it was ridiculous. But one day I realized how much I believed, deep down, that no one would love me if I didn't meet these requirements.

I started looking around and noticing all the people in relationships who were heavier, louder, more disagreeable, etc etc etc than me. At first I thought, "man, I must just be the most un-lovable person in the world if I am prettier, ........ etc, and still no one wants me". Then I started to realize that it wasn't that something was wrong with me, or those people I was judging without even wanting to, there was something wrong with the twisted beliefs I was taught.

Your worth isn't defined by your looks or your accomplishments. It is a constant that you don't have to justify or prove. Yes, there are people out there that will judge you for your "imperfections", but these are the people whose opinion you shouldn't care about. It is like a screening process. If they are in a place that they can't see what is truly important and don't like you for your appearance, then you now know to not worry about their opinion or waste energy on them. Move on to find others who accept you for what is important.

I write all this knowing it isn't easy. I work on this every day and know how difficult it is. I reaffirm my attempts to shed the twisted belief by looking around me at couples and groups of friends and seeing that not everyone is perfect, some are overweight, some have scars, are missing limbs, have bad hair, moles, bad teeth, bad shoes etc etc etc, but they have all found people who love them and accept them just like they are.

I also agree with posters who said to not rush for a relationship. I know it seems everyone else in the whole world is a couple. I have been single a long time and it drives me nuts how the world seems to be centered around couples! I tend to be single partially because of my issues I described above and because I am ok being alone, but mostly because I am too immersed in grad school to lift my head and date. In order to get involved with someone we need to really click, otherwise being single trumps all the negatives of being in a relationship.

Many people can't stand to be alone and get into bad relationships just so they aren't alone. Others feel they aren't worth anything unless they have a partner because they need to be with someone to prove that they are lovable or worthy. They accept being treated poorly because they feel no one else will want them if they don't. This will just lower your self esteem even more.

You are an awesome person so work on that "I'm all that and a bad of potato chips" attitude!

Re: Feel like nobody will like me....
 

You know, after mentioning the bad hair day I realized what if it's a great hairdo but I'm now old and uncool, it's a possibility. The pompadour might have snuck back as awesome.