85% of children "like my son" end up in prison???
 

I got an email from a friend a few weeks ago and it's been troubling me.

She is speaking of my 5-year-old son who has ADHD-type symptoms, though the psychologist did not give him an official ADHD diagnosis for the reason that only the family has reported the concerns, and to give an ADHD diagnosis, the concerns have to be reported by one or two other places such as a daycare or school. He's not involved in either of those, being a home schooler and I work from home (and can't afford daycare anyway) so we don't have that.

I quote the part in question below.

She's not been around my son much at all. She mostly sees pictures of him on Facebook, and I'm not sure how she can deduce problems in him by those coz I post such cute and fun pictures of him.

The time she and her husband were around my son was for about half an hour when they stopped by to pick something up. My son was being surly and scowling at them.

I've actually never seen him treat people outside the family like that as he is usually very friendly and outgoing to everyone he encounters (aside from his family!). He had just woken from a nap and didn't feel like greeting our friends, so he put on a scowl and said he didn't want to say hi.

Then while we stood outside talking to our friends, he went to the window a few times and scowled and even growled at us, but I knew it was not serious anger. I know his true anger and it's a lot worse than what he was pretending to do.

I've told her a bit about my struggles with his continued willful disobedience (over and over he does the same things he knows he's not supposed to do, and he does them with a secretive "trying not to get caught" attitude).

We have interventions set up in the form of a behaviour consultant and a behavior interventionalist (I think that's what he's called), with whom we've recently started working here at home in the past week (all paid-for by the Autism Funding we get, as my son has been diagnosed in the autism spectrum, though the psychologist said he's low in the spectrum and most people wouldn't know he's "got autism". His problems are more behavior stuff.)

I've not replied to that part of the email from my friend. I'm really not sure what to say.

I wonder if anyone here agrees with her assessment of 85% of children with ADHD-type symptoms ending up in prison.

Are those of you who are adults who had ADHD-type symptoms in your youth in prison?

Do you have, or know, a child who had ADHD-type symptoms and grew up to be a criminal and ended up in prison?

Re: 85% of children "like my son" end up in prison???
 

This psychologist sounds fishy. I suggest you seek a second opinion.

Re: 85% of children "like my son" end up in prison???
 

I heard the same thing, regarding them not being able to give a diagnosis of ADHD unless it's reported by more than just the family, from the pediatrician and my family doctor. I guess that's the rules here in BC.

The psychologist did mention in her report about my son having symptoms of ADHD. She just didn't diagnose him as such. She diagnosed him with PDD-NOS.

Re: 85% of children "like my son" end up in prison???
 

Sounds like a very judgemental and sweeping statement to make based on little interaction with your son.

Re: 85% of children "like my son" end up in prison???
 

Re: 85% of children "like my son" end up in prison???
 

... I'm sorry, but I'd pull a sarahsweets here and tell your friend where she can shove it. That's way out of line. Your son is, what, 5?? Even an NT child at that age is going to have issues, they are testing the boundaries and becoming their own little person.

I'm not real sure why, but her statement gets my hackles up... badly.

Re: 85% of children "like my son" end up in prison???
 

tell her to go stuff it! I'm a 37 year old male who has never been in jail or arrested and am a hard worker w a big heart so it dont mean anything.

Re: 85% of children "like my son" end up in prison???
 

I have seen some interesting statistics on ADHD and imprisonment -

but I've never seen anything like the statistics your 'friend' is telling you.

Screening for ADHD is not done in jails and prisons in Canada,

or in the vast majority of the US.

Perhaps your friend isn't remembering correctly something she heard or read?

Perhaps she's full of baloney!


Here is some information on this topic which indicates something quite

different than the fear-mongering your 'friend' is doing to you:

http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/1...?dopt=Abstract

These stats generally reflect adults who have not been diagnosed or

treated for their ADHD until they are already in prison.

You are aware your son may need a diagnosis and treatment,

so he's much less likely to end up getting in that kind of trouble, eh?

Re: 85% of children "like my son" end up in prison???
 

I have a friend who is ADHD and was recently put in jail for not paying a bunch of tickets, it all caught up with him. He had the money too he just forgot. He gets focused on one thing and forgets everything else. (friend was only in jail for two days)

I'm not much better but I haven't been to jail....knock on wood.

Re: 85% of children "like my son" end up in prison???
 

In Spain to be diagnosed adhd the child has to have similar behaviour in at least two settings, i.e school and home as I guess kids can behave very differently at school or even in friends´ houses.

I have read quite a few times that untreated adults with adhd can end up in prison as they often get involved with risky behaviours and substance abuse presumably looking for something that is missing chemical wise.

I´m not sure this person is really your friend.

Re: 85% of children "like my son" end up in prison???
 

It sounds like your friend is the one with issues. Maybe your son saw something in her that made him want to scowl and stay away. Children are very perceptive.

Re: 85% of children "like my son" end up in prison???
 

This lady is full of crap.

She "saw" something "not right" in a few pictures or a few moments and concluded she has some sort of insight into exactly what that "not right" is AND can predict the adult your son will be??

She is the one that needs prayers that her meddlesome character will be forgiven.

Re: 85% of children "like my son" end up in prison???
 

If 85% end up in jail, and we ADHD folks here represent the 15% that isn't in jail, well, I think that adds up to more people than are currently in jail in more than a few countries.

Re: 85% of children "like my son" end up in prison???
 

F**k her. She doesn't know your son the way you do.

Re: 85% of children "like my son" end up in prison???
 

Wow.

I mean, wow.

It is hard to fathom what sort of screwed-up-edness would cause someone to think that it was ok to say something like that about a friend's 5 year-old.

I mean, whoa. Wow.

It's all I can say.

This is a "friend" to write off, IMHO. I didn't even get past the first couple sentences. I'd be so done with this person...

Seriously, this is what email filters are for. I'd block her every way to Sunday, and when she called me up to ask what was up, I'd say, "You'll figure it out eventually, and if you don't, then that'll just reinforce how much I need to not have you in my life."

[Walks out, shaking head and muttering to herself...]