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-   -   I no longer care about being in a relationship (http://www.addforums.com/forums/showthread.php?t=190338)

Lloyd_ 02-10-18 07:12 AM

I no longer care about being in a relationship
 
Having lost all ability to relate with anyone, I avoid all social interactions with people and get easily annoyed when I'm interacting with them, it's gotten to the point where I also get physically ill whenever I am in large crowds or driving with a lot of other people on the roads. I just want to become a survivalist and completely withdraw from society, you all can have that rotting corpse, its yours.

Have I become a psychopath? Or have I finally had enough with being taken advantage of and no longer allow myself to succumb to abuse? Regardless something is changing inside of me for better or for worse, all I know is I'm no longer the same person I was.

sarahsweets 02-10-18 07:53 AM

Re: I no longer care about being in a relationship
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by Lloyd_ (Post 1985238)
Having lost all ability to relate with anyone, I avoid all social interactions with people and get easily annoyed when I'm interacting with them, it's gotten to the point where I also get physically ill whenever I am in large crowds or driving with a lot of other people on the roads. I just want to become a survivalist and completely withdraw from society, you all can have that rotting corpse, its yours.

Have I become a psychopath? Or have I finally had enough with being taken advantage of and no longer allow myself to succumb to abuse? Regardless something is changing inside of me for better or for worse, all I know is I'm no longer the same person I was.

Hey Lloyd, its been awhile since Ive seen you post so welcome back. I remember the struggles you have shared with wanting or talking about wanting a relationship with someone romatically and I also remember that sometimes your idea of what women wanted or expected didnt match up with what some other people tried to share. With that said, if you truly are just done with people and you know your mental health is well, then its perfectly fine to want a life of solitude. Call it the Jedi lifestyle or maybe even like Thoreau when he went away to the woods- if that makes you happy then go for it.

"Rather than love, than money, than fame,

give me truth.

Our life is frittered away by detail....simplify, simplify.

The mass of men lead lives of quiet desperation".

H. Thoreau

I think its important to make this choice cause you want to not as some sort of resigned protest to lack of relationships or out of anger.

DeClutter 02-10-18 08:39 AM

Re: I no longer care about being in a relationship
 
Hey Lloyd,

I don't know what brought you to this point, there can be many valid reasons for a person to withdraw and prefer a life of solitude.

With all the extra bagagge that most people on this board drag along, opening up to relationships can be twice as hard, and often we have to try a lot harder to maintain them.

Trying to fit in, to function in a "normal" way can be exhausting. And when you meet people who have little understanding of your struggles, or even take advantage of you, you can reach a point where you have nothing left to give. Ironically, relationships can sometimes lead us to abandon ourselves, and when that goes on long enough, there is no "social" energy left in us.

Perhaps isolating yourself is not always a bad thing, but an opportunity to refocus your life on the relationship with yourself. Were you can make room to become your own best friend.

Little Nut 02-10-18 10:57 AM

Re: I no longer care about being in a relationship
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by Lloyd_ (Post 1985238)
Having lost all ability to relate with anyone, I avoid all social interactions with people and get easily annoyed when I'm interacting with them, it's gotten to the point where I also get physically ill whenever I am in large crowds or driving with a lot of other people on the roads. I just want to become a survivalist and completely withdraw from society, you all can have that rotting corpse, its yours.

Have I become a psychopath? Or have I finally had enough with being taken advantage of and no longer allow myself to succumb to abuse? Regardless something is changing inside of me for better or for worse, all I know is I'm no longer the same person I was.

Hi Lloyd, Do you still enjoy your routine activities when you are alone? Do you still enjoy driving or getting to where you are going when the roads are empty? Is it performing your tasks is burdensome enough and when you add-in people interactions it is even MORE burdensome? -LN

Simon_ 03-02-18 03:45 PM

Re: I no longer care about being in a relationship
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by Lloyd_ (Post 1985238)
Having lost all ability to relate with anyone, I avoid all social interactions with people and get easily annoyed when I'm interacting with them, it's gotten to the point where I also get physically ill whenever I am in large crowds or driving with a lot of other people on the roads. I just want to become a survivalist and completely withdraw from society, you all can have that rotting corpse, its yours.

Wow, that sounds exactly like me. Are you on medication for add by chance?

Any relationship is off-putting, if not down right impossible for me. My life is going down hill fast, I'm not inclined to take anyone along for the ride.

freshish 03-08-18 04:02 AM

Re: I no longer care about being in a relationship
 
I also have that struggle since my ex boyfriend split up with me. However, I assure you, you are not a psychopath.

daveddd 03-08-18 07:15 PM

Re: I no longer care about being in a relationship
 
loyd buddy, how u doin

it could be the hurt and alienation of attempted interaction has driven to avoidance

IF this is the case, there is no self help

you must get more intense psychiatric help

If this was something you are just ok with, well, it doesnt come off that way

speaking from experience

Dave D

allesandro1 03-09-18 12:40 PM

Re: I no longer care about being in a relationship
 
Oddly enough I find myself in the same position lately, having just left a new job I started in September, having felt exploited and abused. I did feel as though I had abandoned myself, because I wasn't eating properly or sleeping.
I too am in my 60's and do a lot of thinking back. I'm not socializing either because it's often so damn difficult and so much work, and for me it's not unusual to feel bullied or taken advantage of in some way when I do attempt to. So I'm down to one close friend with whom I feel completely safe and at ease. I am also starting to take better care of myself now that I have left that job.

sarahsweets 03-09-18 09:13 PM

Re: I no longer care about being in a relationship
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by allesandro1 (Post 1988036)
I too am in my 60's and do a lot of thinking back. I'm not socializing either because it's often so damn difficult and so much work, and for me it's not unusual to feel bullied or taken advantage of in some way when I do attempt to.

I think its seriously, really important to take a look at what happens that makes you a target or victim of bullying or being taken advantage from. It doesnt matter if you live a life of solitude forever, finding out why that is will open a lot of doors that have remained shut.

allesandro1 03-10-18 10:49 PM

Re: I no longer care about being in a relationship
 
I agree it is important to know, and I do. Not much I can do about it


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