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Old 10-06-17, 11:53 AM
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Jacksper Jacksper is offline
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Letting go of it all

Hi all,

It's a while ago since I've been here, anyways, here's something interesting to talk about...

Let go of everything.

Sometimes I want to let go of it all. I want to do that now. Quit my job and be my own employer. I had 3 projects going on and I have been removed from 1 one them, that I secretly thought was my favorite. On the one hand I am relieved, on the other I am angry with my team. The leadership skills of my team mates were terrible, and they weren't skillful in other ways (see, I am angry... I *might* sound a bit harsh and unreasonable here so you'd better take what I am saying with a bit of salt :P).

I feel like I want to be self-employed now. Just choose my own schedule, my own path. No more employers (I like my employer but I don't like the fact that I have to ask permission), no more weak colleagues.

The good things about my current job: my employer pays for my courses. He is a nice guy who is patient with me. I have colleagues who are generally nice people.

The bad: I don't get any guidance, even though I am starting out in a new field. My colleagues are mostly pretty distant and don't do much for me. I am being put on projects without supervision. The projects are badly organized.

I really want to go and go independent. I basically am doing that now already, without the sense of freedom. Am I just being emotional and stupid? (probably :P)

The other option would be discussion these thoughts (in a smart way) with my employer. See if I can change my current job to fit me better.

God I am happy that it's weekend. I am really sick of this ADHD ****.

(I am just writing down my thoughts/feelings here... curious what you think of it. I know that being self-employed is not ideal and I may or may not want to go that route, but the current course does not work for me either and I am sick of feeling like I am not having a grip on my life)
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