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Old 11-05-17, 05:38 AM
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OyVeyKitty OyVeyKitty is offline
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Re: Friendships are hard

Way to go, heythere999! You have achieved so much, that's incredible!!

OK, anecdote time! I am an extrovert myself (we seem to be a rather rare species on the internet ) and in my teens and very early twenties I partied a lot. I would throw a huge everyone-is-welcome-just-BYOD party at least once a week and so naturally I had a lot of "friends." I grew out of it and the people who stuck with me after I became much more boring were my true friends. They made up about 2% of this group of people.

Actual, true friends are hard to come by. They are the ones who love you for who you actually are, not for your social status, sexual orientation or because you're always so funny. My actual friends who stuck by my side after I quit partying were happy and supportive when I came out as gay (and later as bisexual) and even go with me to gay bars. They cheered me on when I quit smoking even when they still smoked and they have supported me when I have gone through rough times and been as much fun as watching paint dry.

It was certainly difficult to adjust at first to not being super popular, but I have since gotten used to it and wouldn't have it any other way. I much prefer the company of introverts these days because I enjoy deeper and meaningful one-on-one conversation. It's also easier to focus like that than in a group of people all talking at once! Plus, I find that because my introvert friends often need a lot of personal space I have time to fit several in during my week and still have plenty of time left over for my own hobbies!

That ended up much longer than I intended. Sorry!

TL;DR: What I was trying to say with all those words is that yes, friendships totally are hard! But once in a blue moon you come across someone really special, and with them friendship is a lot easier. The best thing about them is that they are for life and conversation with them is so much more fulfilling that you only need to find a few. The transitional period is really difficult but you will be so much happier when you get used to it, I promise!
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