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Old 12-25-17, 09:44 PM
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Re: How to raise a confident human? Rules of the playground

Quote:
Originally Posted by Caco3girl View Post
I wouldn't expect a 1.5 year old to understand the phrase "leave her alone". One of the largest struggles in life is to parent or not parent someone elses child. I'm of the opinion that it takes a village to raise a kid and that means I WILL parent someone elses child. If they don't like it, they don't need to hang out with us. Conversely, if my 8 year old is at their house doing something wrong I expect them to parent my child and scold them, put them in a time out, or send them home and call me if it's bad.

For that particular scenario I would let the other mother attempt to parent their child, and when all they did was say leave the other kid alone, I would intervene. I would tell the other kid it's not okay to move Fuzzlings blocks or take her cracker. I would offer the other kid a cracker, if they still tried to take fuzzlings cracker I would physically separate them...this could be with a pillow or other barrier so they were each playing separately until the other child got over their obsession with putting their own things in the box. I'd bring them back together later to see how it went, and would separate them again if need be.

Learning how to REMOVE yourself from a bad situation is also an effective way to deal with conflict. MORE people need to deploy that defense in my opinion.
Thanks caco. These are great ideas.

I'm really struggling with dealing with other kids...or rather my own need to be liked and appear "nice" mainly to their parents' or my friends and acquaintances or sometimes total strangers.

I'm reading a book called "it's ok not to share..." Which issllsbout allowing kids uninterrupted free play and allowing them to learn how to voice their needs and resolve conflicts (eg " I'm not done yet with this toy. I will bring it to you when I'm done"). It makes a lot of sense but she says parents absolutely should intervene and stand up for their child.

I tried this but it didn't go so well. I told the kid he didn't have to share and didn't allowfuzzling to take away his toy but later or kept trying to take everything fuzzkibg was playing with. He would grab her toy and then point and laugh at her. I tried to return the toys to fuzzling's DTI nicely ask him to wait till fuzzling is done but he just ignored me. He was just two though so husr talking to him nicelymight not help. I don't want to physically remove another child or prise a toy out of their hand.i felt pretty embarrassed anyway. I tried to explain to his parents what I'm going and why but I couldn't get a coherent sentence out and they weren't really interested anyway
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