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Old 01-22-18, 11:15 PM
specialangel specialangel is offline

Join Date: Jan 2018
Location: Chicago, Il.
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specialangel is on a distinguished road
Just a guess but looking back..I was crazy.

I'm a senior citizennow and we seniors tend to get a lot of flashbacks into our younger days.

I'm now a very conservative person (not politically but lifestyle wise) - my house is very clean, I'm obsessive about my appearance and health, I'm quiet and never make a scene. In a group I fade into the woodwork. Quite shy and speak very lowly - always have to repeat myself, etc. You get the idea.

Weird part is I am the opposite of what I was like when I was growing up. In Catholic (!) grammar school I was a wild child in my demeanor.

Looking back I know I used to get checks on my report card from the nuns re: "Lacked self control." Dr. Phil would call it lack of "impulse control.' I went to school dirty and unkempt, rarely bathed. I would do things in class like put my bracelet down the back of the boy in front of me - anything for a laugh or to amuse my self. I got into a screaming match with one of the boys. I had few friends - in the later grade - none. The other girls got into boys and fixing up their hair and clothes - I had no idea how to do that. 'Got left further and further behind.

My immigrant mom had bigger fish to fry than check out her daughter's appearance on the way to school. Dad was a drinker and we barely could make the rent each month. Always worries about money and all the fighting - and verbal abuse. I was overly protected and rarely left my yard. Older siblings weren't home much and when they were - lots of fighting between them and my parents and then all of them together.

Considering my odd youthful behavior (!) in my later years I'm horrified. Some of it was worse than I can say (not sexual) just hygenic. Very embarrassing - involving bathroom habits or lack of them.

I wonder what the heck was wrong with me? Is this bizarre behavior indicative of ADD?

I was a lost lamb - terrible inferiority complex but I think my worse problem was I just sort of grew up like a wild piece of corn swaying in the breeze. Amazing I was able to turn it around and become the very sedate, professional older lady I am today!!
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