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Old 02-07-18, 07:01 AM
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OyVeyKitty OyVeyKitty is offline
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Re: my horrible addiction to smoking

Cigarettes really are awful. The worst part about being addicted to them is that they genuinely do help with some ADHD symptoms. I am more productive, less anxious, more kind and have a good out if I get upset and need a quick break. Just have to excuse myself to go for a smoke, which will remove me from the situation as well as give me some nicotine to calm me down, perfect combination. Unlike what most people who quit say, I genuinely loved smoking. I actually liked the taste of them and looked forward to every cigarette I smoked.

I quit for my health, for vanity reasons (skin is way healthier, teeth whiter and I don't smell) and for my wallet. It took me a good while to get to the point where I no longer crave them all the time and as I'm unmedicated for my ADHD my mood just isn't as stable without them.

I would love to tell you how to quit, but there's really no other way than stopping. That won't happen unless you genuinely want it for yourself, because it takes every bit of willpower that you can muster. Your mind will come up with every excuse in the book to just have one cigarette for the next several months or maybe even a year or longer, and you have to be able to firmly tell yourself no. Every. Single. Time. No matter how much you know it would help you at that moment. You can't even entertain the thought or you will be right back to smoking again after a while.

Quitting also has this paradoxical effect after a few weeks, when the immediate psychological withdrawals start waning, where it feels too easy a lot of the time. At this point you can fall into a false sense of security and end up smoking again because you tell yourself you apparently aren't really that addicted. There were no physical symptoms after all. This is the most difficult part of quitting in my experience, and I fell for it more times than I would like to admit. When you quit you have to quit and never again let your mind even consider having a single smoke, no matter what's going on in your life.

All this is to say, that you shouldn't beat yourself up for being a smoker. It's hard enough for people without ADHD to quit, it's even worse when you use it for self-medication. Vaping sounds like a good option if you feel like you aren't up to the task of quitting right now. At least that would take care of the second hand smoke problem. I'm sure it's cheaper too, so even if the initial investment is high you will save money over time.
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aeon (02-07-18), Gypsy Willow (02-08-18), namazu (02-07-18), psychopathetic (02-07-18), sarahsweets (02-07-18)
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