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Old 02-12-18, 03:40 PM
Gwyn413 Gwyn413 is offline

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Location: San Antonio, TX
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Parenting a boy with ADHD

I have an 11 year old son named Jack. He was diagnosed with ADHD when he was 8 after years of struggling at school. I put him on an I.E.P. and they sent him into special education in Colorado, where he thrived.

We moved to Texas (husband is military) and we put him into the special education program at Cody Elementary, where he was abused by his teacher (she gave him 2 inch long cuts on his arm, and bruises on both wrists). I had to remove him from the I.E.P. program in order to get him out of that school. He now attends Forester Elementary (Northside Independent District). He has been there for only 3 weeks and has already received 3 write ups and 1 in-school suspension for having meltdowns.

It has been miserable and frustrating dealing with these issues again (these are the same issues he had before he was diagnosed). I think he should be on an I.E.P. again, but my husband believes he needs to "toughen up" and disagrees with my parenting style completely. It's causing a lot of strife at home.

Basically, my husband and I probably both have ADHD. My husband was beaten severely as a child, and then abandoned at 15. He had no dad. I was abused mentally, and some physically, as a child until my parents kicked me out at 17. We've both handled our situations as best we could. My husband thinks he's a better person for his, but I disagree.

I want my son back in an I.E.P. program because he has less meltdowns in general (except for his last school, his spec ed teacher was awful). My husband wants me to keep him in general education because he thinks being tough on him will somehow make things click, and he'll start behaving. He also wants to spank him for discipline, hasn't bonded with him, is largely negative towards him. He's very critical of Jack, and I think he deflects onto Jack. Basically, it's become me and Jack vs. my husband. Jack and I are very close, and because of that, my husband is very critical of my parenting (while he spends 8 hours+ a day on computer games and Imgur). He parents from his computer chair.

I'm at a loss. I'm tired.
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