Thread: some new stuff
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Old 02-03-20, 11:17 PM
Emre22 Emre22 is offline
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Re: some new stuff

Originally Posted by Drogheda98 View Post
no, fact is, I'm smarter than Austin was, not my words but his generally speaking.

I loved em like a brother, and that's what counts, what's on the inside of each of us, in his 30 years of living he lived more than most will live in 5 lifetimes. Hell the memory in the other thread, that was one day in the life of our inner circle, I have like 200 more memories similar to that, probably more, it's those memories that keeps the darkness at bay. was I the smartest person in the room at the club, probably, when the emotions hit hard, the thought of him not being on the planet anymore, no amount of math get's me through that.

I'll illicit my intellect here, all sciences, math, and so on except for the humanities are of the unconscious trying to become manifest, the "Cartesian omego (sp). once I learned that all math was simple, the place we get science from, the greats like Einstein and newton, all trying to figure the same thing out, differentiation, inner/outer. even the biological changes in carbon chains follow a very similar pathway as humans react, because they are made of the same stuff, through evolution.

none of that matters cause one of my best friends is gone. which paragraph has more character, more gumption, more life, the one of the club, or carbon chains. I used to think similar, science was all their is, and don't take me the wrong way, awe IS a lot of science, I've got to see personally the Andromeda galaxy and other intergalactic star systems with my own two eyes through a, forget the name of the telescope, billions of light years away. the awe is the beauty, the awe is a bunch of people, gathered together to see the galaxy so they can in turn tell their own proginey of "that cool telescope that looked like it was from star wars" and so maybe they can show their own progeny and it's the connection to those people that make it all possible, and that connection, is closely related to awe and awe is not science, awe is a feeling, awe is what makes the world worth living in and on, awe is why I go on, awe is what says "that way" and I follow with hardly any hesitation, awe is instinct, awe is incredible, awe is a feeling.

I figured out the second phase of the triporta of the mind, probably the hardest thing anybody can do because it's almost completely an inner psychological thing and hell if I can accurately explain how cause explaining inner stuff is hard, just trying to do so risks psychological injury on my end.

contemplating the cosmo's, the spiritual, that of the spirit, the unconscious, how part of me was austin and part of austin was me so there is a part of me missing because that's what humans are, we love eachother like we are all family and when one of the pack is gone it hurts, hunter gatherer, full blood human I don't care, austin is in my mind and heart, math can't do that. I've forgotten so much science, I remember my first soccer match with my friends.

smarts, for me is just the ability for one such as myself to be the bread winner and break bread with those he(me, even though the he, him, himself is odd in first person, whatever) cares about.
hmm , i don't know whether it can be helpful or not but

we will die one day, at least austin had great one, joyful

a short life time which is full of joy and fun is better than long but boring&painful one

i didnt want to underlie importance of science, i wanted to underlie your condition is psychological and you can seek for the knowledge that can be helpful to you
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