Restaurants

[Ranmaru]

Talk about anything restaurant related. Double dates, ordering food, etc etc.

I wanted to talk about how I always take a long time to process the menu. This is especially bad if i'm at a new restaurant. I hate it when the waiter goes "You ready?" Because I feel I haven't had enough time to decide.

I then think that I just always have a hard time deciding when it comes to buying, such as games at gamestop. (Because I want to make sure i buy something worth my money)

Do you guys think that may be related to ADD, or just a perk about me?

feel free to talk about anything you'd like about restaurants. ;o

[grADD student]

Hey Ranmaru!

Do you guys think that may be related to ADD, or just a perk about me?

I think it must just be you. New restaurants are my ADHD favorite. I have a rule that my decision is to always find the strangest thing on the menu, and immediately shout, I'll have that!! Sometimes I have a great discovery that I never would have tried otherwise.

Most delicious accidental weird food discovery

Applebees: Skillet Fried Bananas Foster Caramel Walnut Blondie. It was taken off the menu because no one ever ordered it, but it was a skillet fried slice of heaven.

[Lillianmay]

My problem is I have trouble with reading comprehension - add in the distractions and yes I have trouble with menus.I try to look up the restaurant on-line first. Most have a menu on-line and that gives me lots of time.

[Ranmaru]

Hi Gradduate!

Hmmm, really? Yeah, it's hard for me to be open to new things on a menu... Especially with really big menus. D: I then panic and order the simplest meal.

I like Lillian's idea, I have also been using an online menu, because I really want to make sure I get what I really want. : D

Although your 'must try the weirdest meal' rule seems interesting. I just don't think I'm daring enough to do that! If I did, I'd most likely buy something I KNOW I like afterwards (if I didn't like the new random meal ;o)

[purpleToes]

Originally Posted by Ranmaru

Talk about anything restaurant related. Double dates, ordering food, etc etc.

I wanted to talk about how I always take a long time to process the menu. This is especially bad if i'm at a new restaurant. I hate it when the waiter goes "You ready?" Because I feel I haven't had enough time to decide.

I then think that I just always have a hard time deciding when it comes to buying, such as games at gamestop. (Because I want to make sure i buy something worth my money)

Do you guys think that may be related to ADD, or just a perk about me?

feel free to talk about anything you'd like about restaurants. ;o

Indecisiveness is one of my impairments. I tend to get overly fixated on optimizing or picking the absolute best option. For example in the grocery store I literally took over half an hour to choose a jar of jam even after I had narrowed it down to two. I eventually bought both but even that decision I weighed for a good ten minutes. Imagine my anxiety when the decision was about something truly important or life changing.

I worked hard with my therapist on making decisions more quickly by being more accepting of "good enough" choices and recognizing when I am spending far more time on a decision than it merits. It still happens when I'm tired, off my game, whatever, but less often and less severe.

I have a Dx of ADHD but no diagnosed subtype, but I think I'm ADHD-I or SCT or similar. I think I would tend to be a little indecisive based on my personality, but the ADHD is what raises the severity to a level of impairment.

Sorry this wasn't about restaurants much. I guess I could add that I'm indecisive about picking a restaurant, picking what to wear to a restaurant, whether to go out or order in, or any other conceivable choice involving restaurants!

My partner doesn't complain if I take forever to order, but if I'm out with friends, I am self conscious about it. A couple of times when I knew I was going to a particular restaurant, I was able to find the menu online and do some deciding in advance.

[Hadria]

Originally Posted by k8e123

Indecisiveness is one of my impairments. I tend to get overly fixated on optimizing or picking the absolute best option. For example in the grocery store I literally took over half an hour to choose a jar of jam even after I had narrowed it down to two. I eventually bought both but even that decision I weighed for a good ten minutes. Imagine my anxiety when the decision was about something truly important or life changing.

This is me. Once I spent somewhere around half an hour in a bookshop because I couldn't decide which colour a manila folder should have to correctly express my identity When in restaurants, I become more and more indecisive the more I read of the menu, and when the waiter arrives, I have to draw lots on the spot because it has become impossible for me to decide. Mostly I just go to the same places over and over again and order the same food without even looking at the menu.

Thankfully I've learnt not to care about at least some things. When I was a child, I could sit for hours at the hairdresser pondering how I wanted my hair cut, because the decision seemed of enormous importance. Now I just think 'oh well, it'll grow out again,' and go with it. The grave importance of small things still pops up at unexpected times, though, recent examples including choosing a birthday card, deciding on a theme for a Power Point presentation, and choosing between two things to make for lunch (in the end going without). Why people expect me to be able to choose what career I want, whether or not to have a baby, or where to settle down, I don't know

[sarek]

Its always so hard to make a choice so instead of endlessly studying the menu in the end I always seem to fall back to my default choices.

One thing I dislike intensely is how to get the attention of the waiter if I want something. Some of these people are highly skilled in the art of looking while not seeing.
I know that is not really an ADD problem but its far more related to introversion and some social anxiety on my part.

[shysmile]

When I'm at a restaurant with my family, it can be frustrating. It feels like
I have to block my ears while I read the menu or else I'll never be ready to order when they are.

They will gab on and on, and actually TALK about the menu items while they are reading their choices, and decide out loud which one out of two they should get...while I'm trying to study it all just so I can pick something.

Going with just one other person is far easier, lol.

[pechemignonne]

Yes to all of this.

It is always really hard to choose, because there are so many options and they all sound good.

It was much easier when I was vegetarian, especially because back then there weren't many veggie options in non-veggie restaurants.

My biggest problem with restaurants is eating at them.

The food is good, I don't have to cook it, I want it now!

Of course, I can't afford to eat out. But that doesn't seem to stop me.

Every excuse to go to a restaurant I can use, I do.

"I did well in my job interview! Let's celebrate! Chinese?"

"I got the job! Let's celebrate! Italian?"

"I finished my first day at my new job! Let's celebrate! Mexican?"

And so on, and so forth.

[Lunacie]

Very hard to choose from a menu - I too check for a menu online I can
study before going. I like buffets as I can try a little of several things.

And I swear waiters take lessons in timing so they always stop by to ask
how the food is and whether you need anything else just as you've taken
a bit of food and can't answer. Right?

The ones who are best at that don't even slow down, they ask in passing
"Can I get you anything?" and don't even wait for a reply.

[maiforpeace]

Originally Posted by Lunacie

And I swear waiters take lessons in timing so they always stop by to ask
how the food is and whether you need anything else just as you've taken
a bit of food and can't answer. Right?

Thumbs up or thumbs down is all they need from you.

It's good that they are checking with you....they don't have that much time either, unless it's a very high end restaurant, (it's a demanding and stressful job) to wait exactly for when you finished chewing.

Originally Posted by Lunacie

The ones who are best at that don't even slow down, they ask in passing
"Can I get you anything?" and don't even wait for a reply.

Yes, that's rude and unprofessional. They should always catch a signal from you first before walking away, especially if they asked if you needed something.

[Lunacie]

Originally Posted by maiforpeace

Thumbs up or thumbs down is all they need from you.

It's good that they are checking with you....they don't have that much time either, unless it's a very high end restaurant, (it's a demanding and stressful job) to wait exactly for when you finished chewing.



Yes, that's rude and unprofessional. They should always catch a signal from you first before walking away, especially if they asked if you needed something.

So you're saying if I give a thumbs down - they will wait for me to swallow
and find out what I need? Gotta admit, I've never tried that.

There's one high-end restaurant that we really love and I must admit the
waiters there are much better about checking to see how things taste
and what else they can bring you. It confused us a lot when we first
started going there because they circulate and often the person who
brings your meal isn't the same person who took the order, and whoever is
walking by will ask if you want more to drink. I don't think they've ever
made me feel rushed if I can't decide right away what I want to eat. It's
worth the higher prices when we can afford to go there.

[maiforpeace]

Yes, that's because the higher end restaurant has more staff and better communication.

The restaurant you describe has what's called a 'runner' system, which is also a sign of a good restaurant. Sometimes the waiter might be at another table taking an order, and then your food comes up in the window. It would be rude to excuse yourself right in the middle of taking an order, so they need to stay and be polite waiting patiently to finish taking the order. However, in the meantime, your meal is sitting in the window and getting cold.

So, a runner picks up the ticket, looks at what table the food is for and brings it out to you. Or, it might be a co-worker who isn't busy at the moment, or even the manager. That ensures you only get hot, yummy food.

I'm with you on paying extra for good service...good/bad service can make/break a nice dining experience.

(I know all of this because I used to train servers for a chain of restaurants)

[TheChemicals]

i dont like putting the menu down because then i have to find something else to stab my eyes into, and people dont like being stared at...

[stef]

I love restaurants!
the smaller ones here (we go mostly around where our friends live and you kind of get to know the staff);

and in the states too! seriously, I love appleby's...

Except when there's too much background noise, makes me totally uncomfortable.

the thing I hate, is waiters in the states who ask you if you're done or "need a box for that" when you are obviously NOT done and in the middle of a conversation, and the restaurant is only half full. It's not like there's people waiting to get in! may I please enjoy this lunch???

I usually don't have too much trouble deciding what to have. But I hate ordering! I try to be really polite but then i feel strangely phony and condescending. If I'm way at the end of the table, I have to repeat myself usually.