Starting to become an issue

[slowlydownward]

I was diagnosed with Dyslexia and ADD while I was in university, while I was there it wasn’t much of a problem I was helped with my work when I needed it, my deadlines where extended and generally I had a massive support system that I took for granted.


Well it’s now been 2 years since I left university; my first year was fine I just worked in a restaurant so never had any issues really.
But this past year I have started my Job as an English teacher, and the problems are gradually starting to show themselves.


Grading students work is fine while I am in the office but as soon as I get home I have no motivation to do anything except play computer games or something else equally fun but of no relevance to what I should be doing.


It’s also affecting my relationship as well. My girlfriend and I live a great distance apart, my main worry is that I know a lot of the way I was at the beginning was because of hyperfocus. I really care about her a lot but I can feel my attention and patients running out (I know because it’s happened in all my relationships). And the problem is I don’t want it to happen.



I have never really thought my problems where that bad, but it seems things are getting more and more out of control and I want to get it under control before something terrible happens like I lose my job or girlfriend or both.


I have tried writing up a schedule and I was doing really well with it for about 3 weeks then I lost interest, it is still taped to the mirror above my computer its only purpose now is to making me feel bad every time I look at it for not following it haha.


I do not feel bad about the way I am, in fact I enjoy my ability to zone out of situations and always thought they were blessings not hindrances. I just need a way to keep these blessings under control so they don’t interfere too much with my professional life.


So any suggestions are welcome tried and tested ways to keep myself focused on the less exciting but often more important things. Also ways to keep focused on the things I enjoy as well, as I even find that I suddenly stop doing the things that interest me for long periods of time for no apparent reason, then months later thinking why haven’t I done that for so long..

[tortilaman]

Lots of the things that come with ADHD are blessings. Funny you mention the zoning out thing, as somebody I know without ADHD that knew me prior to my diagnosis was always jealous I could just "fly away". The easiest thing to do for staying on task is to get a distraction free setting. Go to a coffee house, or a diner, or just stay at the office until you get all your work done. Locations where there are a lot of distractions are never a good idea. Since you're not living with your partner, you are a lot free-er to do work away from the house, take advantage while you can. In terms of the relationship, I'm afraid I can't be much help there, as I have a similar problem.

[slowlydownward]

thats actually a really good idea, not sure why I didn't think of it. Thanks

[slowlydownward]

thanks, I genuinely hadn't even thought of staying in the office longer. although sometimes that would be a problem just because I can't wait to get out, teaching 50 - 60 kids at a time is exhausting haha.
I think I can work around that though when I really need to get something done.

[tortilaman]

As long as you're not in some sort of distracting environment you should be fine. Go to Dennys for a few hours or something. Get to know one of the waiters. At my last job we would go out to Dennys afterwards, and got to know one of the waiters that worked after midnight on Fridays.

[eeilyk]

Back when I was in high school, before I had any idea that I had ADHD, I would take my work home, I barely did anything in class besides talk and be noisy. I won't say I found it easy to do my work at home, but it was the only way I could get substantial amounts done at a high level. I found that turning music up really loud was the best way to keep me on task, music with powerful emotions generally take my fancy and I would always sing along at the top of my voice, much to my parents annoyance. At the time I put it down to teenage angst but now I work in an office and there is barely a moment outside of phone calls, that I'm not singing a song.. I don't know where they come from because I chop and change all day long and a lot of them are not songs I listen to, lots of them are old songs. My work collegues laugh at my randomness and generally don't mind my terrible voice (i keep it to a reasonable level ), although they do blame me when they get an annoying 80's track stuck in their heads
They're also used to my constant moving, fidgeting, tapping of my feet on the ground, sitting strangely in my chair and rocking back and forth on it.. All whilst singing
So whilst I don't look totally professional, I get my work done and usually I have the best or second best stats in the different office jobs that I've done over the years.
This doesn't always work, I am finding that my productivity had been dropping to unacceptable levels and I think it's because I'm bored with my job, there's no stats at the job to judge myself against, and I think I need that to keep me interested because I like winning things
Anyhow, I'm unmediated until tomorrow, first time on stimulants and I'm hopeful I'll be able to retain the interest in my job with them, I would like to last more than 12 months with the same company for once

Oooops so I shouldn't have rambled that long.. But the gist of it would be to try music

[slowlydownward]

ha thats ok, I enjoyed reading it instead of doing my washing. I will give music a try.

[tortilaman]

Originally Posted by eeilyk

Back when I was in high school, before I had any idea that I had ADHD, I would take my work home, I barely did anything in class besides talk and be noisy. I won't say I found it easy to do my work at home, but it was the only way I could get substantial amounts done at a high level. I found that turning music up really loud was the best way to keep me on task, music with powerful emotions generally take my fancy and I would always sing along at the top of my voice, much to my parents annoyance.

This definitely helps me as well. Personally I don't sing to it, but having some music on gets me in a groove, and then I can just do what I need to do (to a point).