New and need some help, am I just lazy??

[Sentient6]

Hello everyone, been lurking these forums for a few days and finally mustered up some courage to post. Been wondering if I really have a problem for years now, and as a chronic procrastinator I'm finally going to see a psychiatrist on Thursday. I sit here now, 30 years old at my wits end. Unemployed 2+ years and I know what I need to do, but can't do it. I was a good student in high school, hated it but I never really liked being social so I tried to just focus on work. Procrastinated with homework and always had messy writing. I've always lived in my head, racing thoughts, easily distracted. Only time I can talk to others besides my few friends, is when i'm drinking. I overanalyze my thoughts and can never just jump into a conversation, so I am usually just quiet.

I've been talking to my mom lately, and she thinks something maybe wrong too. When my grandfather was living with us his doctor came over and looked at my dad, talked to him for 5 minutes and said, "You know you have ADD right?" Ever since then I have been slowly realizing I may have a problem as well, It may not be as evident as my father though. He is super hyperactive, still has trouble reading and can't write or spell.

I don't want to self-diagnose but what does this sound like? Theres a lot more but I don't really like talking about myself even on an anonymous forum... I'm anxious and scared to talk to this psyciatrist and its costing $200.
(side note this post took me a long time to write for some reason)

[pechemignonne]

You are saying a lot of things that sound like ADHD symptoms, but honestly nobody on a public forum can diagnose you.

I suggest that you hang out here for a while and see if what other people say about ADHD sounds familiar.

You will have to see a specialist eventually for a real diagnosis, but either way, welcome to the forums!

[Sentient6]

Thanks for the welcome! I am seeing a psychiatrist my friend recommended me on Thursday. I hope he is ready for an earful of the mess in my head. I just hope I get a proper diagnosis, if any. I'm worried about not expressing whats going on with me properly.

[silivrentoliel]

write down what you want to make sure you say in advance- that way, if you get flustered or off on a bunny trail, you'll have your list to come back too... good luck!

[Sentient6]

Originally Posted by silivrentoliel

write down what you want to make sure you say in advance- that way, if you get flustered or off on a bunny trail, you'll have your list to come back too... good luck!

Thanks for the advice, I will do that! I havent been to a doctor really since I was a teenager, any doctor. Always been scared to find out if I actually have a problem.

[Amtram]

Don't be scared of that. Finding out you have a problem is essential to fixing it.

[Sentient6]

Can a Psychiatrist diagnose you in one visit? I've really procrastinated myself into a corner here and as usual I feel I need an answer right away so I can get on the right path. Plus no insurance doesnt help either.

[silivrentoliel]

Originally Posted by Sentient6

Thanks for the advice, I will do that! I havent been to a doctor really since I was a teenager, any doctor. Always been scared to find out if I actually have a problem.

Don't worry, it's a process we all have to go through... it's not easy, but honestly, the awesome people here have helped me more than they probably know

[sarahsweets]

Some psychiatrists that specialize in adhd can.

[T-Rex65]

Look at it this way. If you are diagnosed with ADHD, then you will have at least an idea of what's going on with you. You will know that you aren't just "lazy". And that can be comforting.

[Sentient6]

Originally Posted by T-Rex65

Look at it this way. If you are diagnosed with ADHD, then you will have at least an idea of what's going on with you. You will know that you aren't just "lazy". And that can be comforting.

Thanks, I know I am not lazy. I just feel the ways I used to cope have run dry. And as always I'm against the wall and thats the only time I react. Ever since I got the gumption to make an appointment with a psychiatrist its the only thing I can think about.

[rockydaydreamer]

Originally Posted by Sentient6

Procrastinated with homework and always had messy writing. I've always lived in my head, racing thoughts, easily distracted. ... I overanalyze my thoughts ...(side note this post took me a long time to write for some reason)

Lazy? Not at all. I have those problems too. I just got a sample of meds from my general doctor which has helped me with racing thoughts, but I'm having trouble urinating sometimes. I have my first therapist appointment next week, I guess by then it will be officially diagnosed.

[Sentient6]

Well went to the doc and after 40 minutes of talking he said I have ADD along with slight depression and anxiety. WOW. All I can think about now is im 30, and always had a problem and this doc took less than an hour to diagnose. Its crazy! He put me on Wellbutrin 75mg once in the morning then in a week up it to 2 a day.

[T-Rex65]

I'm on Wellbutrin, too. I hope it helps you!

[Sentient6]

Originally Posted by T-Rex65

I'm on Wellbutrin, too. I hope it helps you!

Hows it treating you? Second day for me and im up and down.... hate that.