Seeing through the mist

[s1jackson2002]

Every moment of everyday for as long as I can remember I have gone through life as if seeing through a mist within my head.

Its always been the same. I want to understand myself and my limitations and what I can do and what I cant do.

Most of the time I simply cant function - in anything - on anything.

I have no idea who I am. I dont really enjoy anything. I play video games but thats only because its a way of losing myself. I can read books (albeit very slowley) and lose myself in the pages but once again thats why I do it - just to simply lose myself and get away from feeling the way I feel.

I am so fed up with not being able to operate under pressure and forever seeing the world through my eyes has become more than I can bare.

I have already lost everything once but life goes on right.

I dont even know what I want to get from this post. I suppose I want to know that others also just feel hopeless a lot of the time and wonder what its all for?

Why do I try to fit into a world where I dont really feel like I have any place.

I have an appointment coming up with SEPT but once again that seems like a waste of time coz the doctors never really listen they just hear what they want to hear and not the plea for help that I am there for.

[purpleToes]

It is very difficult. From so many UK posts I've read here on ADDF, it sounds like the UK is a tougher place to get ADHD properly diagnosed and treated compared to the U.S.

My advice to you would be to use these forums to learn as much as you can and maybe to help you more precisely articulate to your doctors what you are experiencing, to help them arrive at the right diagnosis.

My other advice in the meantime is to learn about common health conditions that cause or exacerbate cognitive impairment other than ADHD. A few examples are thyroid disorder, anemia, and sleep disorders. For women, perimenopause can be a factor as the decline in estrogen levels is thought to mildly affect cognition (temporarily).

I actually have a little of all of the first three, and at 43, likely the beginnings of the fourth too - none severe enough by itself for a specialist to recognize as a cause of my symptoms, so were easily dismissed, but together they caused a serious lack of physical and mental energy. Aggressively treating the anemia and sleep apnea improved my fatigue and brain fog symptoms dramatically. (True ADHD symptoms should not come and go, except with ADHD medications.)

I still believe I have ADHD, but after correcting the other problems, what remains of the symptoms is far more manageable.