Why do women say this all the time?

[Spacemaster]

Chem, you just have to find a woman who really does "like" doing what you would like them to do for you.

Find a gal that isn't afraid to fly her freak flag.

[mad83]

Originally Posted by TheChemicals

So basically, if she is only doing it because she likes me, then eventually she will stop doing it altogether when she gets used to me.

Probably, which is sad. I do things for my husband cause "he likes it", which makes me happy. None of these things are uncomfortable or painful though.

[Spacemaster]

Also, it's not fair to accept things from someone, knowing they don't like it but will do it for you, without returning the favor in some way. Nobody wants to feel like they are being used.

[Rebelyell]

Because they can?

[RedHairedWitch]

Originally Posted by TheChemicals

Thanks for the feedback, this community always puts things into perspective for me! No more annilingus in my life!

Okay, so there is a sex act that she only does because you like it. Now so long as you are willing to do something for her in return because she likes, that's fine and fair.

http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=GGG

BUT if she does things in bed for you that don't turn her on and you do not return the favour, then it's not cool and you can expect her to eventually stop doing those things for her.

I suggest thanking her for doing that thing for you, despite it not being one of her turn ons, and asking what you could do in return.

[TheChemicals]

Spacemaster your avatar is so rockstar. I just want to be near you :P

[miellie]

Originally Posted by TheChemicals

So basically, if she is only doing it because she likes me, then eventually she will stop doing it altogether when she gets used to me.

Hit the nail on the head there, exactly just that!

[pitbullgirl65]

Honestly? It sounds somewhat manitpulative/passive aggressive.

[hanikamiya]

Originally Posted by pitbullgirl65

Honestly? It sounds somewhat manitpulative/passive aggressive.

True. But so do many things said by people who really want to say something important, but feel that saying it directly will not be received well, or at all.

[Zevispaz]

Men do this too.. Just so you know.

[TheChemicals]

Originally Posted by Zevispaz

Men do this too.. Just so you know.

So the end result is that the world is an unhappy place where men and women manipulate eachother into a relationship and then show their true colors afterwards and then you are both miserable until you break up, which makes you even more unhappy because you are alone.

Plus, you might have had a child from them so you not only leave with emotional baggage but also a hefty financial debt until the kid is 18....21 if he wants college money.

I dont think i have commitment issues. I believe my issues are realistic and common sense; Women are a bad investment- emotionally and financially. The upside is a temporary happiness huh?

[crystal8080]

Hmmm...no I don't believe this is the case at all. I think relationships turn ugly when we have unrealistic expectations. You can't start playing hide the sausage with someone and suddenly expect them to turn into someone that they are not.

I have been there. Many many times. You hook up with someone, its risky and fun and turns all your wheels, but you can't expect more than that. There has to be more to it than sex or that is all you will be left with. How long are you friends with a girl before you start being intimate?

I'll tell you what my experience has always been. If I met a guy and I thought there was a chance I would actually like him, I would NOT have sex with him. If I thought he was stupid, or an ***, or whatever I would do as I wished with him. Then turf him.

[ginniebean]

Originally Posted by TheChemicals

Plus, you might have had a child from them so you not only leave with emotional baggage but also a hefty financial debt until the kid is 18....21 if he wants college money.

I dont think i have commitment issues. I believe my issues are realistic and common sense; Women are a bad investment- emotionally and financially. The upside is a temporary happiness huh?

I might have agreed with you up until the past while. Facts are afterall, facts. However, I've come to notice that even if something is true, it is not always 100% true.

For instance, being left with a hefty financial debt, well .. that's true, kids do cost money, whether you live with them or not.


See how that bias sorta swings it to a negative pessimistic outlook.

You know.. I'm just noticig this in myself how what I perceive as a realistic and common sense viewpoint could be sabotaging me.

I don't have any advice cause I do this too, and not quite sure how to not see what I see. but I am also realistic that this could be poisoning my life.


anyway.. maybe something to think about.

[oneup]

Submissive girl who like to be used...or else sounds like she is being passive aggressive and doesn't want to do that again...either way she's got low self esteem for doing something she dislikes enough to say that. 20 internet $ says you can get her to do it again. But you might run into problems later, like when she burns all of your **** out of resentment.

[anonymouslyadd]

I see it as an awesome act of love. Really.