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Old 06-28-17, 11:26 AM
GJMom614 GJMom614 is offline
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Beginning the Journey

Hello,

I have a son who shows many symptoms of ADHD. I haven't had him diagnosed, though he worked with a social worker for a couple of years on managing behaviors. I've resisted a diagnosis for a couple of reasons - mostly because I fear that the school will then push for medication, which isn't the route I want to take with him. We have found many strategies for managing his behavior that work a lot of the time.

Then there are the other times...when he is out of control, raging at us for what seem like tiny issues, the negative self talk, the anxiety, hiding in his room for hours, resisting going anywhere at all.

I began reading all I could a few years ago, when it became obvious that he didn't function the same way many kids do. I love information, and hearing other people's stories, and learning new strategies from changing diet to setting up specific routines, playing more and listening closely, making sure I respond to him in appropriate ways -- it's all useful.

This year, 5th grade, was harder at school for him. His teacher didn't really get him, nor did she show much tolerance for kids who learn differently. She did get a system in place that helped him behave appropriately, but she really focused on the tough times and didn't recognize all the amazing things he did -- how kind he is to others, how helpful he can be when he notices you need a hand, how sensitive he is to how other people are feeling. I'm hoping that I can find some great tips and tricks to help him next year - he's showing some anxiety about it already, and summer just began.

I look forward to getting to know some of you, and hear what has worked in your lives - particularly parents who have navigated this path.
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Old 07-04-17, 02:59 AM
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kikicologne kikicologne is offline
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Re: Beginning the Journey

He's lucky to have a mom like you! It sounds like you really know him and listen to him and are looking out for him. Sorry to hear you're having difficulty with his teacher. We are having a similar issue which is why I just joined the board. Perhaps teaching him that there are some people we need to tolerate but that not everyone "gets us" would be helpful. Will he have the teacher again next year?

Having a relaxing summer might help. Sometimes the anxieties they've been bottling up all year, just to get through the stress, come out during the summer months (I noticed this last summer). Maybe he feels safe now and can let his stress out? I know it's painful to see your child suffer...believe me.

I will definitely try to use the summer to help my daughter relax and feel good about herself- will try to give her opportunities to see that she's more than okay!
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Old 07-04-17, 06:03 AM
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sarahsweets sarahsweets is online now
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Re: Beginning the Journey

Quote:
Originally Posted by GJMom614 View Post
Hello,

I have a son who shows many symptoms of ADHD. I haven't had him diagnosed, though he worked with a social worker for a couple of years on managing behaviors. I've resisted a diagnosis for a couple of reasons - mostly because I fear that the school will then push for medication, which isn't the route I want to take with him. We have found many strategies for managing his behavior that work a lot of the time.
I get it. I really do. No parent wants to put their child on medication, its not an easy choice. I urge you to consider it though. Medication is considered the first line treatment for adhd. Not all kids can tolerate medication so I dont want you to get the impression that my solution is medication, but it can really make a difference.
http://www.addforums.com/forums/showthread.php?t=145739
This is a thread that explains how medication helped my son.
I have three kids all with adhd, and my girls could never tolerate medication so its not like I think its the only solution, just that it was a solution that saved my sons' life.


Quote:
This year, 5th grade, was harder at school for him. His teacher didn't really get him, nor did she show much tolerance for kids who learn differently. She did get a system in place that helped him behave appropriately, but she really focused on the tough times and didn't recognize all the amazing things he did -- how kind he is to others, how helpful he can be when he notices you need a hand, how sensitive he is to how other people are feeling. I'm hoping that I can find some great tips and tricks to help him next year - he's showing some anxiety about it already, and summer just began.

I look forward to getting to know some of you, and hear what has worked in your lives - particularly parents who have navigated this path.
Having a good teacher willing to work with you makes all the difference. Sometimes teachers feel overwhelmed in general and are not able to give our kids the attention they need. This is why the "label" of adhd is so important.
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Old 07-05-17, 07:58 AM
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Re: Beginning the Journey

welcome! wishing you strength, and much outside of the box support and facilitation
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