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Non-ADD Partner Support This is a support forum for non-ADD partners, spouses, and significant others offering feedback from both the ADD and non-ADD perspectives

 
 
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Old 01-21-18, 12:40 PM
ScaredWife ScaredWife is offline
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Anyone addicted?

This may be long, please forgive me. My husband is diagnosed as an adult having ADD. He is prescribed 60mg a day (two 30mg pills). He has, over the last few years, consistently ran out of medicine before the end of the month, but I wasn't sure of how early he was running out. Some days he said he just felt like he needed an extra pill.

Cut to last year when this became such an issue that I offered to keep his pills for him and give him 2 every morning. This hasn't worked at all. He begs daily for more pills. He has a hard day ahead or whatever the excuse may be. This last month, he got so ugly about them being "his pills" that I gave them to him. The whole bottle. They were filled on a Monday evening. He took 1 that night and I gave him the rest of the bottle on Tuesday morning. By Saturday morning they were gone. 60 pills in less than a week.

I cried and told him that he was scaring me and he yelled at me to get off his back. Apparently I'm always on his back about the Adderall. I told him that I loved him and I was terrified that his heart would give out and he basically told me to mind my own business.

The problem with his ADD...he seems to have an addictive personality. Not sure if this is something with the ADD itself and how he is wired, but he was addicted to pain pills in the past, which he mixed with Adderall with terrible results. He was out of his head. We actually divorced during that time when he sold the kid's PlayStation to buy pain pills. He went to therapy and started Suboxone and successfully got off the pain pills.

Then he started getting online and meeting women on dating sites. He amassed a huge porn collection, it spilled into real life when I caught him sending nude pictures to a woman he worked with. So, he worked on that and ended up addicted to the Adderall instead.

I don't know if this is just the life I have to look forward to...watching him switch from one addiction to another and yelling at me for "riding his ***".

I love him or I wouldn't have done this for almost 10 years, but if there is no chance for a "normal" life, then I'm not sure I want to keep doing this.

IS addiction part of ADD? My fear is...he takes all 60 pills in a week, then what?? He starts trying to buy again? Is that next? All of our money is gone again to his addiction? Or he just goes 3 weeks with no pills and I can't live with him. Or he switches back to his addiction with women because they don't ride his butt about his pills.

I don't even know what the point of my post is. To vent maybe. Or to see if anyone dealt with an Adderall addiction.

Thanks for listening. I spent the morning crying and I just wanted to put it on "paper" I guess since I don't have anyone else to talk to about it.

He is also diabetic and is prescribed meds, which he takes responsibly. He also takes testosterone prescribed by the doctor which he abuses.

He also lives on Nyquil Severe formula at night because he says he can't sleep from a cough (he's a 2 pack a day smoker since he was 12. He's 50 now).

Thanks for any input or suggestions. But mostly, thanks for the ear.
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aeon (01-21-18), Pilgrim (01-21-18)
 

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