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Old 07-16-13, 05:05 PM
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Confidence in self-evaluation?

Most of the self-evaluations of myself and my skills have turned out to be completely inaccurate. How confident are you in the evaluations that you make of your own vocational skills? , What needed to happen in your life in order to gain enough confidence in your own self-evaluations to trust them.
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Old 07-16-13, 09:10 PM
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Re: Confidence in self-evaluation?

I have absolutely no confidence in self-evaluation, and I dread evaluations of any kind.

When Barkley and others would talk about problems with self-awareness, I would think, well that's one of them I don't have. I was perfectly aware of my inner life.

Then I read that self-awareness means not just a subjective awareness of what is going on inside yourself, but an ability to also "see" yourself in action, to have a sense of what you look and sound like to others.

I was astonished to read about that, because I could not remember ever, ever having that kind of experience. Well, once or twice, but those seemed like out of body experiences of channeling my mother.

So ISTM that in order to do an accurate self-evaluation, you have to have at least some ability to see yourself in action.

The only area of self evaluation I could get right every time was on organization which, of course, was not very good.
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Old 07-18-13, 11:34 AM
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Re: Confidence in self-evaluation?

I have come to the conclusion that there really isn't anyone else to evaluate me unless I want to pay for some kind thorough psychological evaluation, and then get it translated somehow into what kind of job I would be good at.For me to just to refuse to evaluate myself might have a worse result, than for me to just continue bang my head against the wall and continue taking my failures the best I can. I think the most important service to a person with ADHD is getting thorough psychologically testing, that allows a person to match the results to a vocation that will work out.
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Old 07-18-13, 12:00 PM
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Re: Confidence in self-evaluation?

I think I have a pretty good awareness of who I am today. I did not have it growing up. I didn't have the capacity to stop and think or look. I was so self consumed that between ignorance and inability I didn't care. I was going to do what I wanted and act the way I wanted regardless.
It was sort of a blessing in disguise. I was so ingnorant I didn't realize how much living with AD(H)D was hindering my life. So it didn't affect me as much internally.
Once I become an adult and had to pay bills and keep a job, and get a significant other, then I quickly realized that my actions and behaviors and how I interacedt with others was now very important. Thats when the anxiety, frustration, depression and anger began to really surface and become a real problem.
Today I'm humbled, I've learned to laugh at myself, and I'm very careful now about the feelings of others. My self evaluation comes from when I look in the mirror and ask myself, "am I being the best person I can be to myself and to others". Thats all that really matters to me.
I have accepted the fact that I have a disorder and that I'm different, but I embrace it and do the best I can in spite of it.
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Old 07-18-13, 02:17 PM
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Re: Confidence in self-evaluation?

Okay, I see at least 3 kinds of self-evaluation cropping up, and so we are all sort of talking past each other.

The original question was about vocational skills. I understood it to be the kind of self-evaluations that some jobs ask for. Other than giving myself low marks for organization, and maybe so so marks for motivation, I have no idea how I am seen as an employee, especially as a classroom teacher. It was easier as a nurse.

Or, it could be the kind vocational evaluation that helps a person think more concretely about career paths -- if we can't figure out our own strengths and weaknesses, we go for a psych evaluation (by_design).

Or, it could be the self evaluation of a life well lived overall, the kind we do while looking at the person in the mirror (Tmoney).

Hmmmm.
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Old 07-18-13, 02:26 PM
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Re: Confidence in self-evaluation?

I am at a point in my life where I am scared to self- evaluate my skills for the purpose of choosing a career path. I don't think i have much of a choice, but to self-evaluate myself. I have not been allowing myself to even ask myself what I enjoy. I think for me though I am not supposed to enjoy my work, it is enjoying my work that gets me in trouble in the first place. I also find that imposing any kind of workplace procedures on my enjoyment already makes it unenjoyable. So yes, I guess I see things completely differently from everyone else on this forum. When I am at work i just want to find out how the boss wants things done, then I do things exactly that way.
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Old 07-18-13, 02:46 PM
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Re: Confidence in self-evaluation?

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Originally Posted by by_design View Post
I am at a point in my life where I am scared to self- evaluate my skills for the purpose of choosing a career path. I don't think i have much of a choice, but to self-evaluate myself. I have not been allowing myself to even ask myself what I enjoy. I think for me though I am not supposed to enjoy my work, it is enjoying my work that gets me in trouble in the first place. I also find that imposing any kind of workplace procedures on my enjoyment already makes it unenjoyable. So yes, I guess I see things completely differently from everyone else on this forum. When I am at work i just want to find out how the boss wants things done, then I do things exactly that way.
I don't know how different that is. Lots of people choose a job for very practical reasons, and look to the other parts of life for enjoyment.

Our problem, of course, is that we often end up bored and stuck with poor motivation and poor performance in such jobs. But if you can utilize enough "just do it" motivation or even some kind of enjoyment, like taking pleasure in a job well done, that could work.
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