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Old 08-28-18, 04:04 PM
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psychopathetic psychopathetic is offline
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Re: The what's bothering you RIGHT NOW thread Part V

Guys...I don't have anyone to fight for me anymore. Not in the ways like my mom did.

My mom would fight for me fiercely...and she wouldn't quit. She'd only dig her heels in a fight even harder for me. She wouldn't back down. And when things got real tough...she'd get real tough. There'd be NO pushing her around.

She was my f***ing rock man. She protected me from the weather...she made sure that I was never treated like just a number in the system...that I was ever pushed around, and she'd do her damn best to make sure no one just gave up on me and left me in real bad positions in life.

I feel almost naked in a big wide open world...vulnerable and weak and exposed.

What if **** hit the fan? Who'd dig in deep and fight for me till the bitter end?
My mom would've.
My mom would've...

Do I do it for myself now? I feel so inadequate...though I also have a feeling that if things do go south real quick, there is a warrior inside that...if I'm lucky...would errupt from deep within me and dig his heels in deep...

I miss my mom though. By buddy...my rock...my protector.

Damn it...sometimes I wish I didn't "feel" anymore. But at the same time...I also never want to stop missing my mom. I know that's a total contradiction and I also know that I've no words to explain it...so meh!

I miss you mom. I just do
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