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  #1  
Old 10-21-15, 04:18 PM
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Adderall & Sex. Help!

Okay, so I've been on adderall since I was 15, I'm now 23 and still on it. Around the ages of 18-20yrs I took an extended drug holiday and was off of it for about 3 years. I got married at age 19, and our sex life was great. Once I got back on adderall (30mg xr) I noticed a significant drop in my sex drive, and has maintained very low since. Sex seems so completely uninteresting and I feel awful for my hubby. He completey understands, and is not pushy or angered by this, but I feel like such a crappy wife! I have to pretty much force myself to get things started, and once it does I sort of get in the mood, but I then become quickly bored. 😩 It's frustrating because before I went back on it, we had a very healthy sex life, but now it's become a chore, and is as frequent as once a week to sometimes once every other week. Poor hubby.
There have been times where I wake up in the middle of the night, after all the meds have been "slept off" and I wake up totally in the mood, and I wake the hubsters up for a 2 am romp in the sheets- which he gladly participates in- but, I'd rather be in the mood anytime, versus 2am booty calls.

I know there are a lot of mixed reactions when it comes to adderall and sex drives (usually male up and women down) but I'd really like to hear from the gals- and guys- who've had this same issue, and what my options might be?

Serious commenters please, yes I know I'm a horrible wife and my husband has it bad. Also, I don't normally get this personal with a bunch of strangers. Sorry if tmi haha.
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Old 10-21-15, 05:00 PM
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Re: Adderall & Sex. Help!

You are not at all a horrible wife. Far from it. ..or you wouldn't be here trying to look for solutions, I guess.

Other than that I unfortunately don't have much advice.

maybe you could try not taking your meds one day a week or so?
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Old 10-22-15, 09:43 PM
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Re: Adderall & Sex. Help!

Huh. I have the opposite affect. I get extremely horny when I take adderal. I take instant though so maybe that makes a difference. But honestly I was under the impression that everyone got like that.

I know you said you are not into but but maybe you could try and sort of force it, until you get into it.
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Old 10-23-15, 07:45 AM
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Re: Adderall & Sex. Help!

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Originally Posted by Breezlesauce View Post
Sex seems so completely uninteresting and I feel awful for my hubby. He completey understands, and is not pushy or angered by this,
Its good that he understands because its not your fault.

Quote:
but I feel like such a crappy wife! I have to pretty much force myself to get things started, and once it does I sort of get in the mood, but I then become quickly bored. 😩 It's frustrating because before I went back on it, we had a very healthy sex life, but now it's become a chore, and is as frequent as once a week to sometimes once every other week. Poor hubby.
Drop the crappy wife feeling. Its not your fault. And while I get feeling bad for your husband, he loves you too and knows this isnt your fault. If you had cancer or some sort of accident and couldnt have sex as much he would understand right. Guilt has no place in our minds and hearts.

Quote:
Serious commenters please, yes I know I'm a horrible wife and my husband has it bad. Also, I don't normally get this personal with a bunch of strangers. Sorry if tmi haha.
YOU ARE NOT A HORRIBLE WIFE AND no, he doesnt have it bad. He has a wife who loves him enough to do some self examination to figure out whats going on.
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Old 10-23-15, 11:00 AM
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Re: Adderall & Sex. Help!

There are many ways to show affection for your husband besides sex. Yes, sex can be enjoyable, but your sex drive or lack thereof does not affect your ability to be a good wife.

Personally I have a rather high sex drive, and have only once been with someone who had a similar one. Our relationship was kind of a train wreck.

As far as solutions, as someone suggested, maybe have the occasional day off your meds, or talk to your doctor about dosage and timing (for example, I juggled the timing of mine with my doc so I'd still have some energy left at the end of the work day)

If you want to get in the mood, maybe do a few things to get your motor started... Creating the right environment, certain reading materials ;-), and changing up your after work routine... Sometimes going on a date helps too. You can also try changing up how you have sex too; part of the issue may be the fact that you've been together long enough that things are too familiar and routine to be exciting.

In any event, all that advice is secondary to what people have been saying: Marriage is not about sex. Your sex drive is not your fault, nor does it decide on the value you offer your relationship.

Plus, your husband can always take matters into his own hands, if you'll pardon the poor joke.
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Old 01-24-16, 11:51 PM
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Re: Adderall & Sex. Help!

I have the exact opposite effect.
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Old 10-01-17, 10:23 PM
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Re: Adderall & Sex. Help!

Quote:
Originally Posted by Breezlesauce View Post
Okay, so I've been on adderall since I was 15, I'm now 23 and still on it. Around the ages of 18-20yrs I took an extended drug holiday and was off of it for about 3 years. I got married at age 19, and our sex life was great. Once I got back on adderall (30mg xr) I noticed a significant drop in my sex drive, and has maintained very low since. Sex seems so completely uninteresting and I feel awful for my hubby. He completey understands, and is not pushy or angered by this, but I feel like such a crappy wife! I have to pretty much force myself to get things started, and once it does I sort of get in the mood, but I then become quickly bored. 😩 It's frustrating because before I went back on it, we had a very healthy sex life, but now it's become a chore, and is as frequent as once a week to sometimes once every other week. Poor hubby.
There have been times where I wake up in the middle of the night, after all the meds have been "slept off" and I wake up totally in the mood, and I wake the hubsters up for a 2 am romp in the sheets- which he gladly participates in- but, I'd rather be in the mood anytime, versus 2am booty calls.

I know there are a lot of mixed reactions when it comes to adderall and sex drives (usually male up and women down) but I'd really like to hear from the gals- and guys- who've had this same issue, and what my options might be?

Serious commenters please, yes I know I'm a horrible wife and my husband has it bad. Also, I don't normally get this personal with a bunch of strangers. Sorry if tmi haha.

Did you ever find a solution?? I know this is an older post but I am in the same situation and know EXACTLY how you feel, just not a wife yet and afraid because of this I never will be
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Old 10-08-17, 06:45 AM
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Re: Adderall & Sex. Help!

Get all your lady parts and associated hormones checked out.
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Old 10-09-17, 04:43 PM
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Re: Adderall & Sex. Help!

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Originally Posted by sarahsweets View Post
Get all your lady parts and associated hormones checked out.
Yup, this is the solution it seems.

Gotta get those hormone panels done!

You can also try hormone-balancing adaptogens like rhodiola and ashwagandha.

Those seem to work really well for giving your sex life a little bit of a boost (of course, check with your doctor before taking any supplements).
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Old 12-12-17, 06:01 AM
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Re: Adderall & Sex. Help!

As a guy Adderall and Vyvanse increase my sex drive which sounds good but its really not. A lot of times it puts me in this sort of "go" mode and makes me uncomfortably horny. I noticed that nicotine use on the meds makes this effect even worse. My girlfriend doesn't like having sex with me while im on the meds because she says it lasts to long and feels impersonal which sucks because I depend on the meds for my job. I also feel bad because when we do have sex sometimes I feel like its just to get rid of this urge so I can relax rather than to make a personal and emotional connection with the woman I love as you should with sex in a relationship. Im not a doctor but my best guess is the sex drive changes for both sexes has to do with the increased anxiety that the medication can cause. When men are stressed and anxious they tend to want sex to calm themselves but many women respond the exact opposite, they shut that side of themselves down and usually seek other methods for release. For me, exercise helps with this side effect as I burn off the excess energy and the natural endorphins help relieve my anxiety.
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Old 12-12-17, 02:38 PM
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Re: Adderall & Sex. Help!

Quote:
Originally Posted by broken_spear09 View Post
As a guy Adderall and Vyvanse increase my sex drive which sounds good but its really not. A lot of times it puts me in this sort of "go" mode and makes me uncomfortably horny. I noticed that nicotine use on the meds makes this effect even worse. My girlfriend doesn't like having sex with me while im on the meds because she says it lasts to long and feels impersonal which sucks because I depend on the meds for my job.
You depend on meds for more than just a job. She needs to get used to this or you should change up your routine.

Quote:
I also feel bad because when we do have sex sometimes I feel like its just to get rid of this urge so I can relax rather than to make a personal and emotional connection with the woman I love as you should with sex in a relationship.
Ive been madly in love and married 22 years and there are plenty of times we havesex just to get it out of our system or relax. Not all sex is a deeply rooted emotional connection. Sometimes its pure lust and sometimes its just what you do. There are no rules.

Quote:
Im not a doctor but my best guess is the sex drive changes for both sexes has to do with the increased anxiety that the medication can cause. When men are stressed and anxious they tend to want sex to calm themselves but many women respond the exact opposite, they shut that side of themselves down and usually seek other methods for release. For me, exercise helps with this side effect as I burn off the excess energy and the natural endorphins help relieve my anxiety.
My husband tends to not want sex when he is stressed.
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