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  #16  
Old 03-05-17, 03:21 AM
emmaugoh emmaugoh is offline
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Re: Can't Study vs Don't Feel Like It

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Originally Posted by ToneTone View Post
I'm a teacher. Do I ever feel like grading papers, as I'm doing this weekend? Uh, no! ... and I don't even ask myself that question anymore. What gets me to grade or do the other work?

Well, for one, I want to keep my job. So that encourages me to get going. I want students to feel like I'm a good teacher, so that gets me going.

There is also the negative. To be blunt, not working is just as miserable--or MORE miserable--than working. Because when I'm avoiding work, I know it and feel it and worry about it and fret about it and feel guilty about it. Jeez, much easier to just do the doggone work.

Sometimes I have to set a 5-minute timer to get started. I do that a couple of times and it doesn't take long for my brain to realize, "hey, this isn't going to kill me." ... And I can keep going ...Sometimes I watch television in the background. Often I use music to get me over my start-up anxiety. I play some music, always some of my favorites and I can get to working without a lot of pain.

One thing I've learned is to be really aware of how I talk to myself about work I want to do. If I tell myself, "this is gonna be a major pain," then yes, I will avoid the work.

Really, the most helpful move I've learned in the past ten years is to focus on how good I will feel when the work is done. How relieved and positive I will feel compared to avoiding the work and delaying the work.

Frankly, when it comes to predicting how I will feel after starting an activity, my brain simply doesn't work. I can't tell you the number of times people have invited me to movies or parties or other gatherings and my first reaction was, "I don't really feel like it." Sometimes I REALLY didn't feel like it ... as I have had a problem with depression. And yet, I've learned, my brain is TERRIBLE at predicting whether I will have a good time. Time after time, I have dragged myself out only to have a blast after I get there.

Literally, in my case, there is almost no correlation--none, the brain just can't get it right--between how much I feel like doing something and how good I will feel once I do the thing. So if I generally know that doing such and such is good for me, I try to drag myself to the activity--even if I don't feel like it.

Just a few cents ....

Tone
This is the best read of the day for me...
actually am not diffrent from you.... I do tell people my psyche is messed up cos i dont know what is good for me...i just reject doing so many things because my brain and strenght wont connect to it.

But i found strenght in your motivation....if only i can focus on how i willl feel if i complete the task than how i feel before the task
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  #17  
Old 03-05-17, 04:35 AM
Letching Gray Letching Gray is offline
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Re: Can't Study vs Don't Feel Like It

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Originally Posted by _edijane_ View Post
I'm a mature age student with life long ADHD. I'm studying part time, doing 2 out of 4 subjects each trimester (I have to in order to stay on top of it, and even then it consumes all my time). The thing is, up until now I have enjoyed the perks of hyperfocus. But this term, despite sitting at my desk, eager and willing to study all day, my brain just isn't working! I am absolutely familiar with the invisible brick wall that can appear between me and a task if I can't achieve the right head space / motivation / enthusiasm to jump into it, but this is different. This is me showing up, and my brain isn't. It feels like my meds aren't working. I've tried coming at it a million different ways: pushing through, watching YouTube lectures & animated videos, drawing diagrams & mind maps, listening to podcasts. But I'm reading paragraphs over and over and they're just not going in.
I've come to this forum because despite perhaps being well read in ADHD, or knowing someone intimitley with ADHD, non adhders don't seem to get it.. other than my Dr.. They don't get that it's like working with broken machinery. It's more than being vague, forgetful, having a wicked imagination thats way more enticing than reality, &/or not being able to break down that blastard invisible wall that's always popping up in your way; it's also plainly and simply that your brain doesn't do what you tell it to. The amount of will power it takes to make progress is monstrous, this image of ADHDers being undisciplined is another subconscious notion most people hold without knowing it, and in my experience it couldn't be further from the truth!
So I take a break & try again, & when that doesn't work, I think 'it's clearly not going to happen today, might as well do something else'. But you can only do that so many times before your failing & throwing thousands of dollars in student fees down the drain.
Well today I'm ******! I've had enough! And I'm over it!!
Time for some wine.
Is it time to consider a med change? Depending on the rx you take, how often and the dosage, it may be time to do some fine tuning or to try another rx. How is your sleeping? Are you exercising? Under more stress, in emotional turmoil, gaining or losing weight? Have you had a complete work up by a physician in the last 5 years? Do you need a vacation? Is the material particularly boring?

No judgement here. Perhaps you could ask yourself, if it seems relevant, if your consumption of alcohol is safe while on ADHD meds?

You come across as someone very dedicated to his education. That is great to see.
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  #18  
Old 03-05-17, 04:38 AM
Letching Gray Letching Gray is offline
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Re: Can't Study vs Don't Feel Like It

Your response helped our newbi. Good job.
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  #19  
Old 03-06-17, 03:04 PM
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julialouise julialouise is offline
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Re: Can't Study vs Don't Feel Like It

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Originally Posted by dvdnvwls View Post
That's just it. All of the "can't do it vs won't do it" in the original question comes down to "Yes, of course you can, but how much will it cost?"

The assumption from people without ADHD is that any task will cost me the same as it would cost them to do the same task. Often, the cost for them to do a particular task feels sufficiently close to zero that they don't even consider it worth calculating. People who don't have ADHD can be surprised or not believe that things are different for those who do have it - "Seriously? Come on, this isn't difficult."

And I often misjudge, sometimes wildly, how difficult or draining a certain task will end up being for me, especially if it's something "emotionally heavy".

Then again, maybe being constantly in a state of high stress (from things not done yet) and having a low ability to handle that stress (due to emotional dysregulation) IS a legitimate reason to avoid tasks that come with excessive emotional turmoil.

Except then they never get done, the stress continues to increase, the urgency increases right along with it, until a Chernobyl-like disaster occurs, and just like the Soviet government I cover the disaster zone in concrete and try to forget that it happened.

Good times.
This is exactly what I've been going through this school term!! The emotional dysregulation is mostly under control thanks to Wellbutrin, because when I was just on an SSRI, I was a MESS. Now, I can experience the stress and frustration and regret without letting it consume me until I've fallen into a pit of depression.

But the emotionally charged thing is so real, because I'm in a 20th century history class, and all the political issues and conflicts and developments were all awful and have led us to where we are now, which is also awful, and my anxiety tells me that it's all going to get worse, and my ability to catastrophize goes way up. (: (: (: So, reading about the lead-up into WWI and WWII and the Cold War are not very reassuring.

I think I understand now why ignorance is bliss. But awareness can mean survival :/ Unless it gets out of hand, like it does for me.

And then I have trouble being able to do work for my other class because I'm just so mentally and emotionally drained.

Can't/won't. I think that "can't" happens when you know you need to do something, you really want yourself to do it, and you may even physically try, but the wall comes right up & then you're paralyzed trying to figure out what to do and how to do it, wasting even more time. And then that's how a person ends up playing video games or reading a book they like or drawing or scrolling through facebook (which honestly isn't very enjoyable, but I get sucked in too easily)
"won't" is more like, "wow, that sounds awful, i'm definitely not doing that." The emotional response to the inability to complete the task is what makes the difference.

I spend much more time wondering why i can't do something, rather than "just" getting up and doing it. I've had this word document open for a while now. Still haven't been able to start, and it's because I need to cite sources for this 1 page reflective assignment for my major, and I would be able to write a response if I didn't have to deal with the tedious process of trying to remember how things from different readings can be relevant to my response.
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  #20  
Old 03-08-17, 11:30 AM
Postulate Postulate is offline
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Re: Can't Study vs Don't Feel Like It

Quote:
Originally Posted by _edijane_ View Post
I'm a mature age student with life long ADHD. I'm studying part time, doing 2 out of 4 subjects each trimester (I have to in order to stay on top of it, and even then it consumes all my time). The thing is, up until now I have enjoyed the perks of hyperfocus. But this term, despite sitting at my desk, eager and willing to study all day, my brain just isn't working! I am absolutely familiar with the invisible brick wall that can appear between me and a task if I can't achieve the right head space / motivation / enthusiasm to jump into it, but this is different. This is me showing up, and my brain isn't. It feels like my meds aren't working. I've tried coming at it a million different ways: pushing through, watching YouTube lectures & animated videos, drawing diagrams & mind maps, listening to podcasts. But I'm reading paragraphs over and over and they're just not going in.
I've come to this forum because despite perhaps being well read in ADHD, or knowing someone intimitley with ADHD, non adhders don't seem to get it.. other than my Dr.. They don't get that it's like working with broken machinery. It's more than being vague, forgetful, having a wicked imagination thats way more enticing than reality, &/or not being able to break down that blastard invisible wall that's always popping up in your way; it's also plainly and simply that your brain doesn't do what you tell it to. The amount of will power it takes to make progress is monstrous, this image of ADHDers being undisciplined is another subconscious notion most people hold without knowing it, and in my experience it couldn't be further from the truth!
So I take a break & try again, & when that doesn't work, I think 'it's clearly not going to happen today, might as well do something else'. But you can only do that so many times before your failing & throwing thousands of dollars in student fees down the drain.
Well today I'm ******! I've had enough! And I'm over it!!
Time for some wine.
The psychiatrist who gave you your ADHD diagnosis, did he do an IQ test on you as well to ensure that your IQ is able to support the University program in which you enrolled? And I say this respectfully because I wanted to go to medical college and my psychiatrist who gave me the ADHD diagnosis told me my IQ was able to support post-graduate, but that in terms of memory and non-verbal it would be a close call so he recommended a program where there's less by-heart.

Was an analysis like this done with you?
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  #21  
Old 03-09-17, 02:11 AM
acdc01 acdc01 is offline
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Re: Can't Study vs Don't Feel Like It

How much more schooling do you have to finish? I kept telling myself it was almost over. Just focus on this one step, I only have to do this one step more and I'm that much closer to finishing. This plus study groups made finishing homework a million times easier. Studying for tests though, I usually always waited till the last second and then would cram when the pressure was strong enough.

Work didn't feel remotely the same as studying in university to me. I found it much, much easier than school after i graduated though i still had some difficulties.

There were tests every week so I felt the pressure of cramming every week in school. I was really burned out by my senior year. At work, deadlines were more spread out so the pressure wasn't constantly high. I'm not sure what kind 9f job you were thinking of after you graduated. If say you studied to be a vet, well the hands on with the animals would make it feel totally different than book studying to you too. It'd give you something to look forward to if you liked animals. I hope you majored in something that will give you a job in something you like dojng. Maybe you can look forward to the fun things you'll do after graduating to help you get one step closure to being done with school.
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  #22  
Old 03-09-17, 04:42 AM
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Re: Can't Study vs Don't Feel Like It

I have issues with studying/writing papers for school too. It's a huge struggle and I'm probably on my best med combo ever.

I can't psych myself up/out like ToneTone can and I'm jealous!

I work better at a coffee shop than at home. Maybe give that a try!
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  #23  
Old 05-07-17, 05:30 AM
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Re: Can't Study vs Don't Feel Like It

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Originally Posted by Fraser_0762 View Post
What would you say best describes you more? I feel like I don't want to study, although I should want to study and if I "made" myself study, then everything would be ok. But I can't seem to make myself want to study, even although I "need" to study.

First of all - you are right, but do not feel bad about it. I've noticed it's certainly hard to start, and everyone has the same thing. Some just handle it better. You need to get into the mood to study, and it doesn't happen instantly. It's something you need to learn how to do - but wanting to be able to do so is the first step. Getting yourself to study is, essentially, a trick.

A couple of small things I've noticed that have sometimes helped:

-Having a dedicated place to study, like a small desk in the kitchen or something. Some people go to the library etc. for this purpose.

-Watching or reading some general stuff related to the matter. Articles, YouTube videos etc., that get your brain thinking about the stuff. Sometimes you end up chasing other stuff outside the subject matter, but I'd count that as studying as well.

-Starting with a very small bit. "I'll just read these first two pages and see how it goes." Set a tiny goal where you have to focus for only 5-10 minutes, and see if your brain gets into mood.

-Certain type of music or noise generator to listen to - for example www.mynoise.net has a ton of different noise tracks that can get you in the mood.

Right now, I should also be studying, and actually writing this might help me get into it

Last edited by proileri; 05-07-17 at 05:44 AM..
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  #24  
Old 05-24-17, 07:07 AM
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Re: Can't Study vs Don't Feel Like It

for me it's I CAN'T STUDY
I feel and want to study, but after I go through a couple of paragraphs, I just have a huge repulsive power that pushes me away from the material, I can't refocus and follow the first thing to distract me. Even though I know I must go back, I just can't. It's really frustrating.
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  #25  
Old 06-08-17, 12:34 PM
Aliiciia Aliiciia is offline
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Re: Can't Study vs Don't Feel Like It

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Originally Posted by ToneTone View Post
There is also the negative. To be blunt, not working is just as miserable--or MORE miserable--than working. Because when I'm avoiding work, I know it and feel it and worry about it and fret about it and feel guilty about it. Jeez, much easier to just do the doggone work.
Tone
This right here is my motivation to study because I FEEL so guilty if I don't. That's my type of personality. Also I am really competitive so I have been setting standards for myself and trying to compete with myself to do the best I can.
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  #26  
Old 07-27-17, 07:59 PM
MickeMouseFan MickeMouseFan is offline
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Re: Can't Study vs Don't Feel Like It

If I want/need to study, I drag my *** into a library. Gotta get away from creature comforts of home such as a bed, fridge full of food, TV, computer, pets etc.

In a library, there are no distractions, and the fact that you are surrounded by people who are also studying reinforces the study mentality.
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