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Old 03-05-19, 04:32 AM
Drogheda98 Drogheda98 is offline
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something just happened and I'm trying to figure a puzzle out

sorry if I'm posting in the wrong forum but, damn.

after the last projection in therapy my therapist said to get to work and wright, so I am, he also said in first *and* third person(*in a bit*). I'll relate neurosis, which is the core of the complex, when you have neurosis you find the inner two year old, the *stuff* that was buried and you can also see in another post were I found my inner two year old cause wrighting is the pathway of the brain (in therapy my therapist said to something at the end of my projections, to connect the dots all through the past 4 years has been odd to say the least)

a funny thing just happened.(third person) my dog wanted in my parents room, he was whimpering at the door , they didn't want him in, my dog whimpered some more and this guy was unneasy about the situation, so this guy opened the door and instead of saying (projection, what I should of said) , can't you guys hear the cries of the dog, this guy said "the dog wants in, please let him in"

they didn't want him in, instead they forced him out.

this guy and the dog went into this guy's room, this guy was furious, the only time this guy has really shown real anger in a long time and displaced it onto the ground, the house shock. one of em went ouside to look in the window of this guys room that is open to look in instead of coming to knock on the door to ask how this guy was. instead one of em came in and took the dog away.

heh, when I was looking up the myth of Perseus I uncovered a book called Perseus, the boy who grew up thinking he was a dog. (a crystalized thought and I don't know what the pshychological phenominon is but like, *attaching a thought to a thought* somehow brings more clarity to myself.

after calming down (*really the first time I've been mad in a long time*) I went in my parents room and asked about my first dog.

I got him when I was 2 years old, god I loved *that dog*(an echo from therapy) we were inseperable, we did everything together, a cocker spaniel in my research I uncovered this "“How will I ever help to cure this patient? He or she really needs help.” There are so many things that are taking place in the clinical exchange, either explicitly or implicitly, that we can never give an adequate answer to that question. Why some patients with severe deficits, i.e., childhood trauma improve and others with a seemingly less traumatic past don’t, is a puzzle that often confounds me. An answer, a piece of that puzzle that is often found is the following: that there must have been some person, object, or selfobject experience from the past that the patient had that gave the patient a sense of self that could be characterized as having a feeling of coherence or wholeness. The three major selfobject transferences that Kohut differentiated in his lifetime and the many others that have been theorized since his death are examples of just such experiences.

just the memory of that dog , I need to look up more descriptive ways of emotions but these feels I'm feeling, I never said goodbuy to him cause I was always to scared of death to. boxes keep coming up , bubbling up, in therapy and elsewere like now and I could never piece together why, we buried that dog in the backyard along with all the other animals that meant so much to me in boxes, in the back yard(holy crap my therapist said something about a cemetary.)

Perseus, the boy who grew up thinking he was a dog

when I asked my mother about when we got my dog she said " oh we kept him in a box and I remember keeping the box between *you two*, I asked " who again? , cause I always called my parents "you two"(echo), she ment me and my brother.

I'v heard my mother say to watson "your like a little kid dressed in a dog costume" , I've often heard her chase after watson saying "were are you going" I also remember her saying one night at a resteraunt "I wonder what happened to that kid, could you(I think directed at me) handle these two things.

whenever I say something positive for everyone envolved in my family, be it my brother or sister or dad or mom, they always say "tell watson he is a good boy"

Persius, the boy who grew up thinking he was a dog. I have my first dogs colar, his chain, wrapped around me, my actual first object was my first dog, and I think by using third person I figured out the trauma. holy crap my therapist is good, I'll parse this together in the follow up
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