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Old 06-07-18, 11:45 PM
Rimalucy Rimalucy is offline
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Join Date: Aug 2017
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A ramble for tonight

Hi - joined last year, did one post and left... not my smartest move, but... it's pretty late where I live (with cat and I'm sick of being in my own head, so thought I'd at least put some blather here. I'm 74, and the older I get the more pronounced my HD (no ADD) seems to get, or maybe just my awareness of it (something foreign of course til I'd even heard of it ? 30 yrs ago) along with common co-morbids (apnea + 1-2 others).

Was initially given Ritalin but quit almost right away tho' can't remember why. Now have a script for dex but only take little bits when I have to relax... and it really works well, but also makes my hair fall out - as does any of the other usual meds). I only take it rarely (1 cap or half cap weeks or even months apart). If anyone has a fix for the hair thing, please let me know.. Don't drink to speak of, only smoke a few cigs so full of (deliberate) pinholes they might as well be air ) and graze all day (wt. ok) on quite nutritious stuff - pretty knowledgable re food and luckily like good stuff, tho' a chocaholic.

I realize now my life has always been affected by HD (+ possibly maybe a very little overlap on the spectrum), which is how I ended up where I am... and it sounds pathetic (dumb, etc) to me, except I'm so alone now that I (hugely independent always) think I should make at least a little connection here for now. By 'alone' I mean that I kicked out my ex of 34 yrs just prior to getting old age pension at 65 (again, stupid timing, but I'm only sorry I didn't do it earlier). No children, fair no. of animals, lots of plants, plus only relative (terrific bro.) lives far away and having only been 'here' a few yrs (didn't want to stay 'there') I'm a newbie, never a social bug anyway,1-2 issues keep me from joining (by choice) local 'ladies' groups - never my thing anyhow - and have pretty much given up finding work - small city, v. diff. from metropolises I grew up and worked in til age 50, so only so much happening, but a compromise between recent more rural life of 20 yrs (unsuitable for oldies on their own) and way too expensive return to big cities.

Made incredibly stupid goofs - basically signing off on spousal support - didn't realize I was doing it at the time and now too late to legally change, plus didn't get legal or personal advice - so now stuck on truly inadequate gov't pension, resulting in no life at all, just my Mac, TV, cat + little Honda Fit. And I'm trying hard to figure out what the point is aside from the cat (he's 11 and splendiferous).

Well, this is way too long... hope you're not crosseyed if you did plow through, but wanted to cover basics. Sort of dumping I suppose, not something I normally do, but as I said, I'm so tired of my own 'voice' even with self help CBT. Thanks for the 'forum' to put it in!
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namazu (06-07-18), vaneurysm (06-12-18)
 

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