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General Parenting Issues The purpose of this forum is to discuss general parenting issues related to children with AD/HD(ADD & ADHD)

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  #16  
Old 05-16-17, 06:26 AM
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Re: My teen was recently diagnosed with ADHD. So many struggles...

This may seem drastic but I would look into what it would take to homeschool her until you can get her to a passing point for this grade. They have online schools and most districts have basic requirements that you can meet in your own way. There is no need so subject her anymore this year to what she is going through IMO.
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Old 05-24-17, 10:02 AM
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Re: My teen was recently diagnosed with ADHD. So many struggles...

Hi this is a silly question...When you all speak of 'brain fog' does it wax and wane? Is it jus them being forgetful or is it not understanding or comprehending?? What exactly is brain fog? Thanks..
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Old 05-24-17, 10:42 AM
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Re: My teen was recently diagnosed with ADHD. So many struggles...

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Originally Posted by Vandeluca View Post
Hi this is a silly question...When you all speak of 'brain fog' does it wax and wane? Is it jus them being forgetful or is it not understanding or comprehending?? What exactly is brain fog? Thanks..
Brain fog did not come and go for my son. Starting in 5th grade I noticed him becoming more and more spacey. It progressively got worse, by 8th grade he couldn't follow the conversation, he would walk into a room and forget why he was there DAILY, he gave off the appearance that he was stoned. HUH? WHAT? *eyes squinting*...I don't understand...all thing he said hourly. Couldn't follow the teachers directions, couldn't remember when he tests, or even what he ate for lunch. It was very bad in his case. Then he would get so frustrated because he wanted to remember, he also wanted to talk about it, but he couldn't even find the words to express himself half the time, then he got mad at himself for being "stupid". It was truly horrible.

After about a month on the medication I started to realize he wasn't as spacey. He didn't understand why I was telling him to do things 3 different times and having him repeat it back to me. It started to frustrate him, I had to consciously stop myself from doing it. I had adapted to his brain fog and developed ways to get through, but to him I was talking to him like he was an idiot.

It's been over a year now and he's so much better, he's got a great personality and sense of humor that just didn't come through before. It's been truly wonderful!

I did a search when I first heard the term in relation to my son, this thread was great:

http://www.addforums.com/forums/show...ight=brain+fog
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  #19  
Old 05-24-17, 12:03 PM
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Re: My teen was recently diagnosed with ADHD. So many struggles...

Thanks good explanation....I am going to check out that link.

But after reading your story....It made me further think....If he had adhd all along what made it get 'worse' at that time or was it just that concepts got heavier, or you just got tired (mentally) of working around his issue and you finally realized what was there all the time? I am just curious what made it (brain fog) explode like that...as I am assuming one is born with adhd so it's always there..??
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Old 05-24-17, 01:11 PM
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Re: My teen was recently diagnosed with ADHD. So many struggles...

Quote:
Originally Posted by Vandeluca View Post
Thanks good explanation....I am going to check out that link.

But after reading your story....It made me further think....If he had adhd all along what made it get 'worse' at that time or was it just that concepts got heavier, or you just got tired (mentally) of working around his issue and you finally realized what was there all the time? I am just curious what made it (brain fog) explode like that...as I am assuming one is born with adhd so it's always there..??
Several things can make ADHD and brain fog worse.

Things like more stress ... often noticed when kids reach 5th or 6th grade
(middle school). The work gets harder and the teacher helps less because
most kids are developing better self-regulation skills. Some may make it
through that change fine and crash when they start high school, or even
college. Some do fine until they start a job with a lot of responsibility.

Changing jobs to something that's harder or takes skills that are impaired
by adhd can be overwhelming and cause adhd symptoms to worsen.

Hormones, at puberty and other times, often make adhd symptoms worse.
Some women find that their stimulant meds don't seem to work for one
week during their cycle.

Allergies can make adhd symptoms worse, as can changes in sleep or diet
or exercise. Getting sick or going through a difficult situation can also make
the symptoms worse for awhile.
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Old 05-24-17, 02:22 PM
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Re: My teen was recently diagnosed with ADHD. So many struggles...

Excellent points Lunacie.

Why I didn't know sooner...well the short version is he's my oldest, I didn't know what was "normal". Boys are all space cadets, and all teenage boys are idiots is what I heard when I asked people about it. Everyone said "Oh, he will grow out of it, just give it time"...but it kept getting worse. In second grade he was a typical kid, by 8th grade he was talking asking when he could drop out of school because he was too stupid to go.

What made the brain fog worse in my opinion was what Lunacie pointed out, the teachers and puberty. I see it with my second grader, the teachers give them all these hand outs, give them tests only on Friday's, no weekend homework, and they pretty much walk the kid through step by step of how to do projects....it gets less in third grade, that's when they get graded for real for the first time. Then in 4th grade there is even less support. 5th grade, hey they are trying to prepare the kids for middle school we can't hold their hands..etc. Plus the subject matter gets more difficult. We aren't just talking about the color wheel or See Jane ride the bus, thse are taken off the GA school standards website:

-Discuss how the issues of states’ rights and slavery increased tensions between the North and South.
-Describe the purpose of the 13th, 14th, and 15th Amendments.
-Describe the role of the cattle trails in the late 19th century; include the Black Cowboys of Texas, the Great Western Cattle Trail, and the Chisholm Trail.

The subject matter got WAY more intense!

My son also really started growing around the end of 5th grade so I assume his hormones were overflowing all of 5th grade. I have heard often that puberty intensifies some ADHD issues.
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Old 05-24-17, 03:23 PM
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Re: My teen was recently diagnosed with ADHD. So many struggles...

Ok Thanks for all of this info. I think I am at the stage now with a 13 yo girl as well but am just starting to realize it... (OP want to get them together?? lol)

I am glad I had time to check in today I get your comment about the "don't know any differently."...I hear you. I do wonder what normal is!! She has been so sharp and still is in a lot of ways, but sometimes I ask her questions and I am thinking "how do you not know this" or "why didn't you ask this". etc. She is still fairly organized but I see little signs that she may have an avalanche coming if I don't start to reign this in. IT is not helping that she is going to bed late bc she is so busy..But maybe it is a vicious cycle things are just taking her long.

Thank you again...
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  #23  
Old 06-06-17, 09:17 AM
TylerDurdon TylerDurdon is offline
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Re: My teen was recently diagnosed with ADHD. So many struggles...

Welcome to the jungle. We've been through 4 stimulants, 3 non-stimulants,. 4 therapists and we've probably driven several school guidance counselors to seek other employment. My son is in an anxiety/depression loop right now which manifests in excitement about new things, then dismay and intense anger when he can't do them, to a cycle of intense negativity and depression where he constantly reinforces the worst possible scenarios. Hang in there -- work privately with the same therapist that you use for your kids. You need to support your own sanity while you help them work through this.

The biggest mistake that I made was assuming that 1) all I had to do was send him to the therapist and it would get fixed. 2) He would eventually just "get over it." They're ADHD forever. There's no magic pill.

good luck
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