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Old 06-09-17, 07:34 PM
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Does introversion beget introversion??

Either genetically or through learnt behaviour?
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Old 06-09-17, 07:44 PM
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Re: Does introversion beget introversion??

Some learning will most certainly occur in every case, but I think if a child had the opposite type from the parent, no amount of learning could really change their personality.
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Old 06-10-17, 07:09 AM
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Re: Does introversion beget introversion??

I am very extroverted and husband is introverted. My oldest and middle kids are a mix of both. They make friends easily and are able to be friendly when talking to others but they still are cautious. My youngest is definitely more introverted and an observer.
I wonder if a coping skill for introverts is to observe, assess and then get comfortable? She does plays and musicals but put her in a crowded setting and she hangs back.
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Old 06-10-17, 12:49 PM
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Re: Does introversion beget introversion??

Sarah - I'm sure it depends which introvert, but yes that sounds very familiar.
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Old 06-10-17, 01:45 PM
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Re: Does introversion beget introversion??

My worry is that because I don't really go out that much (or at least not to places where there are other people and even rarer places where we have to interact with other people) that she isn't getting enough of socialising or enough of new and stimulating experiences to promote her development. So that's one of the problems of my introversion.

I also.wonder though if she will learn from me to find other people tiring maybe just because she isn't getting used to people.

I don't know of its related or if that's just how she is but she definitely isn't tge most social baby. Mostly she cries when someone just tries to look at her.
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Old 06-10-17, 02:50 PM
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Re: Does introversion beget introversion??

I wasn't a social baby and would only go to parents and maternal grandparents but I grew up to be an extrovert and very social. I don't think how we are reared has as much influence as we think.

This doesn't have anything to do with Fuzzling but about personalities:

I hit the wall/had a nervous breakdown starting in 2009 and started isolating, I'm very, very different now. I took the Myers-Briggs when I was doing really well in the early 2000's I think and was an Extrovert (I forget the rest of them) then I took it again this past year for school was an Introvert. Both times I took it, I was totally honest. I am not the same person so I wasn't surprised but it is shocking to see it black and white. I don't think it happens to everyone that goes through stuff but it did with me.
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Old 06-10-17, 03:22 PM
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Re: Does introversion beget introversion??

Is your husband more extroverted and might do more of the social things with her?
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Old 06-10-17, 04:31 PM
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Re: Does introversion beget introversion??

Seems to have a heavy genetic component. (Mentioned on Wikipedia.) Although researchers and different personality labeling systems often use a slightly different definition of introversion/extroversion, so it can be hard to extrapolate very well.

And genetics or not, it seems to have a high level of being an immutable trait that can't be modified very much by parent behavior. Just look at all the introverts out there who had extrovert parents but didn't become extroverts; they became introverts who feel bad about themselves because they see introversion as a bad thing.

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My worry is that because I don't really go out that much (or at least not to places where there are other people and even rarer places where we have to interact with other people) that she isn't getting enough of socialising or enough of new and stimulating experiences to promote her development. So that's one of the problems of my introversion.
I guess that's a valid concern. (I don't think it will really cause a problem, but I don't have any evidence. I tried to google for stats, but I didn't find anything matching your situation.) Trying to imagine an equivalent in an older and perhaps more "natural" setting... a mother with one child in infancy would probably carry the baby while doing household work, some of which would be outdoors where you could see neighbors even if you weren't in the mood to interact with them. But I think babies can't see very far, so that might not matter much? People used to get more help with baby care from family and friends ("it takes a village to raise a child"), including neighborhood children, so babies would have a couple caretakers.
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Old 06-15-17, 07:23 AM
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Re: Does introversion beget introversion??

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Originally Posted by Fuzzy12 View Post
My worry is that because I don't really go out that much (or at least not to places where there are other people and even rarer places where we have to interact with other people) that she isn't getting enough of socialising or enough of new and stimulating experiences to promote her development. So that's one of the problems of my introversion.

I also.wonder though if she will learn from me to find other people tiring maybe just because she isn't getting used to people.

I don't know of its related or if that's just how she is but she definitely isn't tge most social baby. Mostly she cries when someone just tries to look at her.
I am an extrovert, no problem going up to random strangers and asking them a question or talking their ear off. My ex-husband is an introvert, gets actually phsycially ill when meeting new people. When our daughter was around 2 we went to the grocery store, she was in the cart, hanging on and buckled in. Every single person we passed she said HI to...every single one. Her father was red faced/embarrassed, he tried to tell her to shush, but nope...the HI's continued.

Kids will show you who they are...it's up to you to respect who they are once they show it.
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Old 06-15-17, 11:49 AM
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Re: Does introversion beget introversion??

I'm an introvert who will go up to random people and talk their ear off.
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Old 06-15-17, 12:01 PM
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Re: Does introversion beget introversion??

I think, every person is going to have their set character regarding this, early on
I'm more of an introvert, so is my son; and so I thought, well its from being an only child;

But then he had a best friend, also an only child, friendly but quiet parents, and he was one of the most extroverted kids I had ever seen.

What's important is to gently introduce the introvert to being comfortable around others.
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Old 06-15-17, 12:53 PM
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Re: Does introversion beget introversion??

... and (I guess?) to gently introduce the extrovert to positive satisfying alone time? Or is that necessary or even possible?
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Old 06-15-17, 01:04 PM
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Re: Does introversion beget introversion??

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... and (I guess?) to gently introduce the extrovert to positive satisfying alone time? Or is that necessary or even possible?
oops I didnt finish my post!
To be sure the extrovert has lots of opportunities to express this side in a good setting
And yes, find quiet time things they can enjoy.
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Old 06-18-17, 02:16 PM
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Re: Does introversion beget introversion??

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Originally Posted by Fuzzy12 View Post
My worry is that because I don't really go out that much (or at least not to places where there are other people and even rarer places where we have to interact with other people) that she isn't getting enough of socialising or enough of new and stimulating experiences to promote her development. So that's one of the problems of my introversion.

I also.wonder though if she will learn from me to find other people tiring maybe just because she isn't getting used to people.

I don't know of its related or if that's just how she is but she definitely isn't tge most social baby. Mostly she cries when someone just tries to look at her.
My mom is very introverted. I cried about not having friends when I was little and she said that friends will just let you down, you need to be your own friend, lol! I'm an extrovert. I don't think you can change what you naturally are, but you might adapt it. I would consider myself a "reserved" extrovert. I love socializing and getting out and meeting new people, and talking in general. But I might seem quiet or shy or reserved as I assess you.

I think there should be an effort to socialize children, not to make them more extroverted, but so that they learn that people are different from their immediate family members, and they get a fuller range of personalities, attitudes and learn how to respond in situations. I know my daughter who is a bright and outgoing personality, is probably an introvert - even though she does socialize and play and even makes an effort to play with kids she doesn't know, once she is tired, she'll let me know she wants to go home (and have time to herself). That is the difference between extroverts and introverts - how they recharge.
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Old 06-23-17, 06:48 PM
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Re: Does introversion beget introversion??

I think tge mechanisms through which introversion can be inherited are:

1. Genetically

2. Learnt behaviour: fuzzlin
g learns from me to prefer my own company to that of others or maybe she sees how much other people exhaust me and therefore starts believing that people are exhausting.

3. Indirect conditioning: (for want of a better word. I don't mean conditioning in the psychological sense ). Since I don't go out that much fuzzling doesn't see that many people and therefore misses out on socialising, which makes her more asocial.

Or maybe it's really just in her nature. Or maybe she is t introverted at all and we are just imagining it (and it's a coincidence that every other baby I know happens to be more easy going and more out going). It's a phase, separation anxiety, and she'll grow out of it.

Maybe I'm exaggerating. Maybe I'm not as much of a hermit I think I am. I know some mum's with babies of fuzzling's age and I meet them at least once a week. Then on the weekend we usually meet some friends of ours. There's also usually some sort of clinical appointment once a week.I try to go out on most days. If nothing else then just shopping or for a walk in the park. Last time i went to the really busy playground in the park and we sat down on the grass and watched the other people. I am also thinking u. Should take her to.the soft play centre once a week. She enjoyed that last time. Well she started enjoying it after my friend left. Till then she was must crying.

That's another reason why I don't love socialising. Fuzzling is always so cranky and whiny. It's just not a lot of fun. Also her nap timings are so messed up and she's a little monster when she hasn't napped makes it really difficult to plan anything.

I did do a mum and baby group which I enjoyed but fuzzling just cried through every session so.I didn't sign up for any other group
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