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Old 04-01-18, 05:39 PM
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How has time blindness impacted your life?

Charles Barkley talks at length in his YouTube videos about time and the serious issues we have with it.

I've been thinking a lot about it and how it has impacted my life. I can name areas that have suffered for sure due to time blindness (jobs/work) but then there are other areas (suddenly 47y/o, never married, no children) that I'm not sure time blindness has anything to do with but then I begin to think that it has a ton to do with it. Maybe it's a mix of it plus my other issues or only my other issues or none of the above.

Can you name areas or issues that you think time blindness has impacted?
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Old 04-01-18, 06:11 PM
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Re: How has time blindness impacted your life?

Oh my God. Every single thing.

I forgot all about it until now.
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Old 04-01-18, 07:27 PM
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Re: How has time blindness impacted your life?

Time blindness is one of the things that makes it very difficult for me to manage my day, especially if I become hyperfocused on something.

It's not uncommon for me to get up at 7:00 or 7:30 AM in the morning with the intention of walking my dog, making myself some breakfast and doing some household chores that need to be done, but nevertheless, thinking to myself that before I get started, I'm going to quickly turn on my computer and check out the headlines in the news, or quickly check to see what's happening in some Internet forum I participate in. It'll just take me a few minutes, I tell myself.

But what happens almost invariably is that I suddenly realize that it's already noon and I haven't had anything to eat for breakfast, haven't walked the dog and haven't gotten any chores done. And I have no idea how it is that what I was doing could have taken four or five hours.

Not too long ago, I woke up a little before 8:00 in the morning but instead of getting up right away like I usually do, I decided to lay in bed for just a little while longer. I closed my eyes and was just letting my mind kind of aimlessly wander from thought to thought. After a while, I thought, "I'd better get up, it's probably been 45 minutes." But instead of 45 minutes, I was kind of astonished to see that it was almost 11:00 AM and that I had been laying there for almost 3 hours. I can't for the life of me imagine how anything I was thinking that morning could have taken 3 hours.

So, now, I've made a rule that I've only been partially successful in following which is that I must at the very least eat breakfast and walk the dog before the computer is turned on. My therapist even advised me to use a paper planner to plan my day in the morning instead of some time management app on my computer or the Internet to reduce the temptation of getting sucked into some Internet forum or news site before I've made my plans.
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Old 04-01-18, 10:14 PM
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Re: How has time blindness impacted your life?

The computer sucks me in too! It's awful!!
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Old 04-02-18, 02:15 AM
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Re: How has time blindness impacted your life?

It's one of the most trying aspects of my life!
Not so much in my actual job, and when I was translating full time, I rarely missed a deadline.

i get so hyperfocused shopping, i absolutely do not see the time pass. the worst is the mall, i am there because really, I need one thing "but first I'll just look in uniqlo to see if anything is on sale..."

when i have to leave at a certain time, i am almost always rushing at the end,
i am sure i will be ready in "10 minutes", but that goes by in a flash somehow, my makeup is done but my stuff isn't ready, or, need socks but then can't find the ones I need (bc for example its raining and certain pairs aren't comfortable with the rain boots) etc.

or leaving work: i have to set reminders to "stop working" because its suddenly past 7 pm, I finished the thing I was doing; but have 15 emails and 3 documents open, if i want to get the train at 7:45 I have to leave the building at 7:30, i have no idea where those 15 or 20 minutes go...

It's also when I have several things I would like/need to do in part of a day, I'm sure I can do 3 errands but absolutely no, not in that hour.

The problem has changed since Ive been diagnosed, because i can now find another way to do something or pare down the list of things I had thought I could do without panicking.

The craziest thing is this:
"but what invairaibly happens is I suddenly realize..."
Because I keep doing all of these things, anyway.
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Old 04-02-18, 04:39 AM
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Re: How has time blindness impacted your life?

Yes this is one of my most stubborn symptoms also.

Getting up in the morning, spending hours behind the computer, not doing very productive things, addictive behaviour to p.e. this forum, opening 10 tabs with different sides at the same time, and suddenly it's afternoon. Many times i have been looking forward to a whole day with free time, and disappoint myself after because i haven't spend it like i wanted. Even when i know how rewarding it feels when occasionally i do.

Not being happy with my working life and let many years go by before taking any real changing action (or a burnout makes me). Thinking i'm still in my 20's for 30 years, not interested in 'playing house' and suddenly i'm in my 50's.

Worse thing though, is that it includes others. I'm ALWAYS at least 15 minutes late, no matter how prepared i am, or how many times i've been held responsible for it. Sometimes it feels like a big joke universe is playing with me, like unbelievable i'm doing it again! I stopped making excuses for some time now, and that feels like a little improvement, that at least i'm being honest about it. Because i just don't know why this happens over and over again.

I think i have this sea of time to get ready when i have p.e. 3 hours left, and suddenly i have to hurry and panic because i can't make it in say the 20 minutes left. Or suddenly remember things i still have to do but forgot about. I can even feel very unreasonable irritated towards the person expecting me to be there on a certain time. And when the appointment is at my place, and the person arrives earlier or exact on time, i'm also annoyed, because there are always some last minute things i still need to do. Not knowing what to wear, underwear socks etc have to match, working on my make up, water the plants, cleaning the house, answering emails or messages i forgot about but suddenly have to be done NOW...

Someone told me once that it shows little respect for others, and that really hit me... so embarrassing selfish, but it's really not about my feelings towards the other person, it's more like sabotaging myself. Yet to some degree, motivation does play a part in it, because when it's really important (p.e. a doctors appointment), i do manage to be on time (but not one minute earlier.. or 'just 5 minutes' late and i can deal with that).
Some good friends who know this, make me believe that the appointment is a little earlier, or sometimes it also helps to not say an exact time if possible (somewhere between ... and ...; it will always be the latter though ;-))), and text when i leave the house. On rare occasions i'm on time, i feel so happy and relaxt... why don't i give myself more of that? When i plan my day from hour to hour, write down every action, i do it, but it's still a challenge to make that planning routine happen
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Old 04-02-18, 11:56 AM
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Re: How has time blindness impacted your life?

I like a window of time to be given too. I've heard that being late is disrespectful and selfish too. If they only knew how hard it was to not be running even later and how distressing it can be. No one can chastise someone with ADHD better than ourselves so there are "consequences to our thoughtlessness."

I'm on meds but I don't know that it really helps in that area.

Kiai S. you mentioned all of a sudden being in your 50's. That is what I mean about suddenly being 47 yrs. old, not married and no kids. It honestly just dawned on me in the last 6 months.

Could I be married with kids right now? YES. I made the right choices in who I didn't marry for sure. The kids thing is a little more complex but I honestly don't know that I would've been a good-enough mother. I see a lot of my mom in how I react to my nieces- very worried about the exterior, how things will reflect on to my sister, the soul-killing "what are people gonna think??" Thank God, my sister is much more laid back and has a healthier attitude about those kind of things.
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Old 04-02-18, 06:27 PM
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Re: How has time blindness impacted your life?

I'm in my 40s with no kids, no marriage too so you're not alone there. Time does fly away but I'm not sure in respect to kids/marriage and also aging if (in my case only) this is the ADHD or just life as everyone else seems to complain about time flying away as well too. I was just talking to a friend of mine the other day about this. She told me not to remind her of our age and that yeah, time just flew away.

Well, I do think I'm not married cause of the ADHD. But not cause the time flying aspect but because I can't really get off my butt to socialize.

Time blindness only impacts me in little ways. Like I might be late to a meeting or something.
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Old 04-02-18, 07:02 PM
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Re: How has time blindness impacted your life?

I don't know which came first, being late or fear of being late.

The anxiety of being late and possibly missing out on something made me so
anxious I was always early (unless I totally spaced out). But then I'd get so
anxious waiting for my ride, or waiting outside the place for the others to
arrive. And anxiety builds on anxiety.

So unless I totally forgot something I was never late ... until the internet came
into my life. Now I can set an alarm, hear it go off and think, okay as soon as
I finish this post I shut it off and go. But something else usually occurs to me
or I'll see that I have a new message on facebook or gmail and well ...
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Old 04-03-18, 12:09 AM
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Re: How has time blindness impacted your life?

Quote:
Originally Posted by Lunacie View Post
I don't know which came first, being late or fear of being late.

The anxiety of being late and possibly missing out on something made me so
anxious I was always early (unless I totally spaced out). But then I'd get so
anxious waiting for my ride, or waiting outside the place for the others to
arrive. And anxiety builds on anxiety.

So unless I totally forgot something I was never late ... until the internet came
into my life. Now I can set an alarm, hear it go off and think, okay as soon as
I finish this post I shut it off and go. But something else usually occurs to me
or I'll see that I have a new message on facebook or gmail and well ...
I know what you mean!! Years ago my friends planned for us to meet at restaurant and for some reason I was really early. I was so anxious!! I wondered if I had the right day and time. When I'm late, people are there and I know I'm in the correct place around the correct time.
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Old 04-03-18, 12:03 AM
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Re: How has time blindness impacted your life?

Quote:
Originally Posted by acdc01 View Post
I'm in my 40s with no kids, no marriage too so you're not alone there. Time does fly away but I'm not sure in respect to kids/marriage and also aging if (in my case only) this is the ADHD or just life as everyone else seems to complain about time flying away as well too. I was just talking to a friend of mine the other day about this. She told me not to remind her of our age and that yeah, time just flew away.

Well, I do think I'm not married cause of the ADHD. But not cause the time flying aspect but because I can't really get off my butt to socialize.

Time blindness only impacts me in little ways. Like I might be late to a meeting or something.
I do know that everyone does complain about time flying as we get older. Could the not being able to "get off your butt to socialize" be depression? My lack of socialization is depression and procrastination due to ADHD.

In my 20's had no desire to marry. I met someone at 29 with no intention of getting serious and told him right up front but I look back and wonder why I felt that way. I had no sense of urgency, no clock ticking, nothing.

After that guy and I did get serious and broke up 2 years later, I was in therapy for the first time and it was suggested that maybe I was that way because I didn't have a good model in my parents. Who knows?
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Old 04-03-18, 01:08 AM
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Re: How has time blindness impacted your life?

Quote:
Originally Posted by finallyfound10 View Post
Could the not being able to "get off your butt to socialize" be depression? My lack of socialization is depression and procrastination due to ADHD.

I was in therapy for the first time and it was suggested that maybe I was that way because I didn't have a good model in my parents. Who knows?
It's not depression. I don't think I'm depressed. I'm very introverted so I hate socializing. Adhd makes me have extreme difficulties getting myself to do something I don't really want to do.

My parents didn't have a model relationship either. I think statistically, kids of parents that didn't have good relationships are much more likely to remain single, get diverced, etc. Think role models make a big difference. Both in showing you how to act in a relationship as well as making you want one and not fear it I think.
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Old 04-03-18, 02:37 AM
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Re: How has time blindness impacted your life?

Does Charles Barkley have AD(H)D?





M
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Old 04-03-18, 11:49 AM
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Re: How has time blindness impacted your life?

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Does Charles Barkley have AD(H)D?


M
Russell Barkley comes out Charles Barkley.

It's a classic adhd mistake I've made several times.



As someone with time blindness, I've struggled most of my life to remember
when things happen ... missed so many birthdays and anniversaries, couldn't
remember what year I had that particular surgery, things like that.

It's better since I've been taking the Omega 3, but still a struggle honestly.

Someone else might be able to say, "Oh, my child started school in 2002"
but I generally have to remember first what year the child was born and then
add 5 years to that to know which year she started school. It's still a process
for me in that way with any event and date.
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Old 04-09-18, 11:38 AM
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Re: How has time blindness impacted your life?

Quote:
Originally Posted by mildadhd View Post
Does Charles Barkley have AD(H)D?





M
Maybe???? LOL!! I'm a mess!!!
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