ADD Forums - Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder Support and Information Resources Community  

Go Back   ADD Forums - Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder Support and Information Resources Community > CO-EXISTING CONDITIONS > Anxiety Disorders, OCD & PTSD
Register Blogs FAQ Chat Members List Calendar Donate Gallery Arcade Mark Forums Read

Anxiety Disorders, OCD & PTSD A forum to discuss Anxiety, Generalized Anxiety Disorder, Obsessive Compulsive Disorder, Panic Disorder, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder, Simple Phobias, and Social Anxiety Disorder

Reply
 
Thread Tools Display Modes
  #1  
Old 01-05-18, 11:18 PM
ryanLRC2015 ryanLRC2015 is offline
Member
 

Join Date: Jan 2018
Location: USA
Posts: 25
Thanks: 11
Thanked 15 Times in 9 Posts
ryanLRC2015 is on a distinguished road
Social anxiety

I tend to deal with social anxiety due to being rejected and hurt in the past. Any time I will be meeting new people, whether it is at work or at a social event, I get this sick feeling in my stomach and I always feel like people really just don't like me. I even go as far as to avoid going to outings if I don't have to go. If it is with a friend one on one, I will hang out, or if we are at a social event, I really only talk to my friend unless other people initiate contact.

I am the kind of person where if I have to go to a social event, especially ifnI am alone as well, I will stand off to the side and wait for someone to talk to me first. I feel like if I do that, then there is a higher chance of them actually wanting to talk to me. I have tried initiating contact before and it always resulted in people getting annoyed, especially since I can be socially awkward. If they come to me first, then they are obviously okay with talking to me. Although I also still fear being talked to out of pity as well, since that has happened to me before too.

I only have a couple casual friends. I have been in situations where I am completely ignored and won't even acknowledge the fact that I am trying to introduce myself. I also am hearing impaired and have a slight paralysis which causes people to be turned off. All of these cases are the reasons why I feel so anxious and uncomfortable in social situations now. I feel isolated a lot as well and being in social situations where I am completely ignored doesn't help. How do you guys deal with social anxiety? Just wondered. After being hurt so many times in the past, I can actually understand why some people would want to give up on friendships and social situations completely, especially since I've thought of doing that.
Reply With Quote
The Following User Says Thank You to ryanLRC2015 For This Useful Post:
daveddd (01-14-18)
  #2  
Old 01-06-18, 01:57 AM
Ronelh Ronelh is offline
ADDvanced Member
 

Join Date: Sep 2017
Location: Chad, Africa
Posts: 112
Thanks: 60
Thanked 164 Times in 75 Posts
Ronelh has disabled reputation
Re: Social anxiety

I haven’t been very successful with the technique of standing there waiting for someone to talk to me. Sometimes people do come and talk to me. But more often they just think I’m kind of unfriendly. I have done better with a bolder technique: looking around for someone else who isn’t talking to anyone and starting up a conversation. At least then I’m not interrupting anyone. It’s scary to take the initiative, but more productive. If people don’t reciprocate when I make an effort, it’s their loss!

I assure you, there are plenty of people in the world willing to accept you or me as we are. We just have to find them. We’ve all got issues of some kind, and much of social interaction involves putting up with each other’s issues. I bet you have a lot of good qualities too that would make you fun to be around. Don’t hide all that you have to contribute to the world! Keep trying, don’t give up!
__________________
"It's this brain of mine, it's always making mistakes. It's got a mind of its own!" -Crutchy in the movie Newsies
Reply With Quote
  #3  
Old 01-12-18, 08:00 PM
ryanLRC2015 ryanLRC2015 is offline
Member
 

Join Date: Jan 2018
Location: USA
Posts: 25
Thanks: 11
Thanked 15 Times in 9 Posts
ryanLRC2015 is on a distinguished road
Re: Social anxiety

Quote:
Originally Posted by Ronelh View Post
I haven’t been very successful with the technique of standing there waiting for someone to talk to me. Sometimes people do come and talk to me. But more often they just think I’m kind of unfriendly. I have done better with a bolder technique: looking around for someone else who isn’t talking to anyone and starting up a conversation. At least then I’m not interrupting anyone. It’s scary to take the initiative, but more productive. If people don’t reciprocate when I make an effort, it’s their loss!

I assure you, there are plenty of people in the world willing to accept you or me as we are. We just have to find them. We’ve all got issues of some kind, and much of social interaction involves putting up with each other’s issues. I bet you have a lot of good qualities too that would make you fun to be around. Don’t hide all that you have to contribute to the world! Keep trying, don’t give up!
Yeah what you said makes sense and thank you, same for you.
Reply With Quote
Sponsored Links
  #4  
Old 01-13-18, 01:05 AM
aeon's Avatar
aeon aeon is offline
ADDvanced Forum ADDvocate
 

Join Date: Apr 2006
Location: The North
Posts: 8,604
Thanks: 25,498
Thanked 14,544 Times in 6,492 Posts
aeon has a reputation beyond reputeaeon has a reputation beyond reputeaeon has a reputation beyond reputeaeon has a reputation beyond reputeaeon has a reputation beyond reputeaeon has a reputation beyond reputeaeon has a reputation beyond reputeaeon has a reputation beyond reputeaeon has a reputation beyond reputeaeon has a reputation beyond reputeaeon has a reputation beyond repute
Re: Social anxiety

So you're socially awkward, hearing impaired, and have a slight paralysis.

If I met you, I'd try to put you at ease, but at the same time be a little socially inappropriate and ask you about those things, because I'm a curious sort, and because I figure no one chooses those things, so no responsibility, and in turn, nothing to be embarrassed about.

Plus, people are usually far more interesting than they think they are, and worth getting to know for that very reason.

Being judgemental, acting like a jerk, and being self-centered are negatives.

Social anxiety, hearing impairment, and paralysis, to whatever degree(s) are not.

Unless someone is the kind of self-centered, judgemental jerk who thinks they are negative, that is, and you wouldn't want to know them anyway, so no matter.


Cheers,
Ian
__________________
@>~,~~'~ Voici mon secret. Il est très simple: on ne voit bien qu'avec le cœur. L'essentiel est invisible pour les yeux.
“Well, look who I ran into,” crowed Coincidence. “Please,” flirted Fate, “this was meant to be.”
Reply With Quote
  #5  
Old 01-13-18, 01:09 AM
aeon's Avatar
aeon aeon is offline
ADDvanced Forum ADDvocate
 

Join Date: Apr 2006
Location: The North
Posts: 8,604
Thanks: 25,498
Thanked 14,544 Times in 6,492 Posts
aeon has a reputation beyond reputeaeon has a reputation beyond reputeaeon has a reputation beyond reputeaeon has a reputation beyond reputeaeon has a reputation beyond reputeaeon has a reputation beyond reputeaeon has a reputation beyond reputeaeon has a reputation beyond reputeaeon has a reputation beyond reputeaeon has a reputation beyond reputeaeon has a reputation beyond repute
Re: Social anxiety

__________________
@>~,~~'~ Voici mon secret. Il est très simple: on ne voit bien qu'avec le cœur. L'essentiel est invisible pour les yeux.
“Well, look who I ran into,” crowed Coincidence. “Please,” flirted Fate, “this was meant to be.”
Reply With Quote
  #6  
Old 01-13-18, 03:32 AM
Aiutalemani Aiutalemani is offline
Newbie
 

Join Date: Jan 2018
Location: Washington
Posts: 2
Thanks: 0
Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts
Aiutalemani is on a distinguished road
Re: Social anxiety

Hello! Thanks for sharing here!
It takes me a while to feel comfortable around people and start interactions with others! Usually, I look around for someone who would not be in a conversation and smile at people when they look at me! If they smile back, I make a comment about the weather or the food, or anything obvious in the environment and that usually starts a conversation. I take the time to get to know a few things about the places and event that I go to have something casual to say and start conversation. Try it a few times and you will get better at it with some practice! You will be surprised at the amount of people that are waiting for someone to talk to them!
Reply With Quote
  #7  
Old 01-13-18, 06:53 AM
ryanLRC2015 ryanLRC2015 is offline
Member
 

Join Date: Jan 2018
Location: USA
Posts: 25
Thanks: 11
Thanked 15 Times in 9 Posts
ryanLRC2015 is on a distinguished road
Re: Social anxiety

Quote:
Originally Posted by aeon View Post
So you're socially awkward, hearing impaired, and have a slight paralysis.

If I met you, I'd try to put you at ease, but at the same time be a little socially inappropriate and ask you about those things, because I'm a curious sort, and because I figure no one chooses those things, so no responsibility, and in turn, nothing to be embarrassed about.

Plus, people are usually far more interesting than they think they are, and worth getting to know for that very reason.

Being judgemental, acting like a jerk, and being self-centered are negatives.

Social anxiety, hearing impairment, and paralysis, to whatever degree(s) are not.

Unless someone is the kind of self-centered, judgemental jerk who thinks they are negative, that is, and you wouldn't want to know them anyway, so no matter.


Cheers,
Ian
I’m sure you would be a cool person to meet. I’ve had people ask about those things like you mentioned and it doesn’t really bother me. As long as people treat me well, I am okay with it. I agree that the judgemental jerks are the negative ones you sdont’t want to know anyway.
Reply With Quote
  #8  
Old 01-13-18, 06:53 AM
ryanLRC2015 ryanLRC2015 is offline
Member
 

Join Date: Jan 2018
Location: USA
Posts: 25
Thanks: 11
Thanked 15 Times in 9 Posts
ryanLRC2015 is on a distinguished road
Re: Social anxiety

Quote:
Originally Posted by aeon View Post
Totally agree.
Reply With Quote
  #9  
Old 01-13-18, 11:12 PM
CharlesH CharlesH is online now
ADDvanced Contributor
 

Join Date: Mar 2017
Location: USA
Posts: 516
Thanks: 94
Thanked 292 Times in 196 Posts
CharlesH is a name known to allCharlesH is a name known to allCharlesH is a name known to allCharlesH is a name known to allCharlesH is a name known to allCharlesH is a name known to all
Re: Social anxiety

Quote:
Originally Posted by ryanLRC2015 View Post
I tend to deal with social anxiety due to being rejected and hurt in the past. Any time I will be meeting new people, whether it is at work or at a social event, I get this sick feeling in my stomach and I always feel like people really just don't like me.
Beta blockers are often prescribed for performance anxiety (that sick feeling in your stomach).
Reply With Quote
  #10  
Old 01-14-18, 05:56 AM
ryanLRC2015 ryanLRC2015 is offline
Member
 

Join Date: Jan 2018
Location: USA
Posts: 25
Thanks: 11
Thanked 15 Times in 9 Posts
ryanLRC2015 is on a distinguished road
Re: Social anxiety

Quote:
Originally Posted by Aiutalemani View Post
Hello! Thanks for sharing here!
It takes me a while to feel comfortable around people and start interactions with others! Usually, I look around for someone who would not be in a conversation and smile at people when they look at me! If they smile back, I make a comment about the weather or the food, or anything obvious in the environment and that usually starts a conversation. I take the time to get to know a few things about the places and event that I go to have something casual to say and start conversation. Try it a few times and you will get better at it with some practice! You will be surprised at the amount of people that are waiting for someone to talk to them!
Oh good idea, I’ll try that!
Reply With Quote
  #11  
Old 01-14-18, 05:58 AM
ryanLRC2015 ryanLRC2015 is offline
Member
 

Join Date: Jan 2018
Location: USA
Posts: 25
Thanks: 11
Thanked 15 Times in 9 Posts
ryanLRC2015 is on a distinguished road
Re: Social anxiety

Quote:
Originally Posted by CharlesH View Post
Beta blockers are often prescribed for performance anxiety (that sick feeling in your stomach).
Oh okay cool. Yeah that could help.
Reply With Quote
Reply

Bookmarks


Currently Active Users Viewing This Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
 
Thread Tools
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is On
Forum Jump

Similar Threads
Thread Thread Starter Forum Replies Last Post
local providers Andrew New York 42 04-21-16 08:38 AM
Treating Childhood Anxiety Prevents Adult Disorders Andi Anxiety Disorders, OCD & PTSD 10 01-29-14 02:57 PM
Social Anxiety is......................... Energizer_Bunny Anxiety Disorders, OCD & PTSD 7 11-21-12 11:26 AM
What Did I Say?! How Do You Fix ADHD Social Ineptitude and Anxiety? Simi27 Relationships & Social Issues 24 05-25-12 12:16 AM
Help with social anxiety meds pharmacy boy Anti-Anxiety/Benzodiazepines/Beta Blockers 9 12-16-04 02:54 PM


All times are GMT -4. The time now is 05:04 AM.


Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.7.4
Copyright ©2000 - 2018, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.
(c) 2003 - 2015 ADD Forums