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  #16  
Old 10-27-17, 11:43 AM
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Re: What do the schools test for?

From a law office in Georgia:

Quote:
Originally Posted by mtlawoffice(dot)com
Although one parent has been granted final decision making authority in the area of education, this does not mean that the other parent is not entitled to receive communication or information from the school concerning the child or children involved. Each parent, regardless of which has been awarded final decision making authority in the area of education, is entitled to receive all communications, such as notices regarding their child’s academic performance, and to attend all conferences, such as parent-teacher conferences, as the parent with final decision making authority. In fact, the parent who has not been awarded final decision making authority should request that he or she receive a copy of all correspondence and notices from the school to ensure that he or she remains fully apprised of the his or her child’s academic well-being.


It is important to note however, that although each parent is entitled to receive information concerning their child’s education, only the parent awarded final decision making authority may make final and binding decisions concerning the child’s education. If the other parent makes decisions or takes actions inconsistent with the court’s determination of legal custody (for example: if the other parent enrolls the child in private school against the wishes of the parent with final decision making authority), the parent awarded final decision making authority concerning education may seek the remedy of contempt against the other parent.
(Disclaimer: I am not a lawyer and can't vouch for this, but I've seen similar on other sites; check with a lawyer if you need legal advice.)

If the above is true, it sounds like the school may be doing its duty in keeping your ex in the loop, even if the final say is yours and he's an ADHD-denying, obstructionist jerk.

I don't know whether having sole (rather than joint) legal (rather than physical) custody makes a difference. Short of an order of protection or something that legally cuts your ex out of his kids' lives entirely, I'm not sure what documentation it would take to remove him from the proceedings entirely.

In any case, I'm sorry you (and your kids' education) have to deal with him like this.
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  #17  
Old 10-27-17, 02:44 PM
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Re: What do the schools test for?

Thanks Namazu, I guess that law is due to all the parents that really did cut off the other parent even though they wanted to be involved. If that were the case though I wouldn't have a problem with him being CC'd, but he doesn't care. He's never been to a school meeting in 11 years, doesn't know what classes either of them are taking, so it makes no sense except to aggrivate me.

Maybe he would be willing to reply that he's not involved in this....maybe I'll ask his girlfriend. She's pretty cool, she might be able to talk him into it.
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  #18  
Old 11-01-17, 09:27 AM
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Re: What do the schools test for?

As an update, yes, they keep trying to involve him. The saddest part was they sent him an email with a letter about the meeting and asked him to return it with a yes he will attend or no he won't. In order to open the email attachment he had to put in her birthday, he didn't know it. #sad
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Old 11-01-17, 09:51 AM
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Re: What do the schools test for?

Quote:
Originally Posted by Caco3girl View Post
As an update, yes, they keep trying to involve him. The saddest part was they sent him an email with a letter about the meeting and asked him to return it with a yes he will attend or no he won't. In order to open the email attachment he had to put in her birthday, he didn't know it. #sad
that's heartbreaking. i'm so sorry you and your girl have to deal with all of this.
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  #20  
Old 11-02-17, 07:39 PM
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Re: What do the schools test for?

Ugh sorry you're still dealing with this and oh my god that is SO SAD that he doesn't know his own kid's birthday.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Caco3girl View Post
Their response, "We are required to inform both parents unless one has been stripped of their educational rights to the child"....what the ever loving heck!

So with my earlier post, I didn't mean that you should ask school not to involve him because they've made it clear, see your quote above, that the law requires them to notify both parents of things. They are following the law. What I meant was that maybe they could give you a head's up on the times they do have to contact him (because they are legally required to do so) so you are prepared to potentially receive a nasty text.

The other thought I mentioned was that perhaps you AND the school could document his responses to things and how uninvolved he is being (I assume he must have asked you for his daughter's birthdate, so you also have a record of him not even knowing that), AND how he harasses YOU when the school gets in touch with him, and provide that as evidence in a court setting to strip him of educational rights. I did not mean present the evidence to the school, their hands are tied.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Caco3girl View Post
As an update, yes, they keep trying to involve him. The saddest part was they sent him an email with a letter about the meeting and asked him to return it with a yes he will attend or no he won't. In order to open the email attachment he had to put in her birthday, he didn't know it. #sad
It does suck, but I promise you they are not doing this to be mean to you, they have to follow the law or they can't be a school anymore lol.

BUT I feel they did give you a helpful hint by mentioning that a parent can be stripped of their educational rights. Maybe you could find out more about that?

I know it seems ridiculous when he's so obviously being unsupportive, it's a no-brainer, but the hoops must be jumped through.
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  #21  
Old 11-03-17, 08:31 AM
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Re: What do the schools test for?

Willow, I appreciate the response. After much thought I've come to the conclusion that since he will never show up, and doesn't even email them back, it's not worth the thousands in court costs. They email me at the same time they email him so I guess that is my only heads up.

My daughter is in 3rd grade. I know the middle school and high school aren't as strict with these rules so I just have to hold out until 6th grade and then the school won't care. Plus, he's rarely out of jail for very long so I'll have those quiet periods too.
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