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Women with ADD/ADHD This forum is for women to discuss issues related to being a woman with AD/HD.

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Old 06-05-16, 10:10 PM
Shamindo Shamindo is offline

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Re: Who has trouble making and keeping friends?

It's funny, cause my closest friends are ones I got to know because of some kind of long term best friend, we always caught the same ferry to school in the mornings and were stuck together for 25 minutes twice a day. Plus we would walk home together, so it was easy to remember about her as she was completely ingrained in my daily routine. did that for six years. If only I could make more friends that way. I've read the best way to get your social fix when you have ADHD is by going to an even that is scheduled. Like church, book club, some other kind of club whereyou meet up with people regularly. I believe that is true. Sometimes I have so much energy, people want to be around me obsessively cause I am so fun..but then the quiet pensive girl comes for hours and I think I probably shouldn't be around anyone while I'm like that. Even my ex husband used to ask me "WHat's wrong with you?!" when I'd get down. He didn't get that it was just my energy surging from one extreme to the other. poor regulating.
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Old 07-05-16, 10:57 AM
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Emy_93 Emy_93 is offline
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Re: Who has trouble making and keeping friends?

Hi dear ,
I am ready to be a friend of anyway but in fact its hard for me to keep friends
Its because I am impulsive
And after of a period of time that I didn't contact my friends , they tell me that they are so angry with me because I am not initiative to talk to them !!
I am so helpful but I forget calling someone who didn't talk to me for a long time
Now I decide that I don't need many people in my life , I need just patient friends
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Old 07-09-16, 01:29 PM
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Opearli Opearli is offline

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Re: Who has trouble making and keeping friends?

i only have three close friends in my life right now.
Three is great but we don't all share the same interests.
So Im constantly trying to make new friends with those interests because I REALLY like talking about my passions.
But I find that when i meet someone compatible and fun my excitment quickly turns into boredom.
I honestly think it may be because of the fact i have a tendsncy to be the main one to carry a conversation most of the time and I kind of wish I had more people to talk to that can topic switch on the flip of a dime.
Maybe I'd get less bored? Just a theory haha
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Old 07-27-16, 07:52 PM
maysarieltiff maysarieltiff is offline
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Re: Who has trouble making and keeping friends?

Throughout my life I have only had one or two friends at a time. We are no longer in touch, but looking back they understood me.

Now that I am older I have made a couple of friends in the last couple of years. We moved to a new state, I knew no one, and the women I have met have been through school, and one through my boyfriend's work. (wife of one of the men he works with).

One girl I met in school said to me the other day, I know we don't talk much anymore but I still think of you. The other friend I met in school, since summer started we barely talk but I feel I try to communicate.

The third woman I met has ADHD as well and we have a lot in common, she is much more hyperactive and talkative than I am, however, so most of our friendship is her talking and me listening and struggling to remain focused. Luckily for me, she understands when I wander off or have to ask her to repeat herself.

My problem is that I get too emotionally involved in any relationship and expect that it be reciprocated. These are silly expectations. When I get close to someone and all of a sudden they are distant I assume its because I talked too much, opened up too much, and now that they know the full extent of my issues, have decided to back off because I am not worth the trouble. In reality, logically, they most likely have their own issues going on and I cannot expect every friend to be there at the drop of a hat when I have a crisis.

I have a tendency to be too honest with my issues. I think because for so long I tried to be invisible, now I have a tendency to be like, "here I am, take it or leave it", and I might overwhelm people.

I don't really look for friends, I guess, but at times I will talk and be more social (I am an introvert) and I crave the attention and camaraderie. I have learned over years how to be social, because for years I was painfully shy.

I was going somewhere with this...OH! lol. Maybe what we are all looking for is people/friends who understand us and accept us for who we are. They are hard to come by, but this is true with any real friend in this world.
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Old 08-17-16, 02:54 PM
RjoyD1 RjoyD1 is offline

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Re: Who has trouble making and keeping friends?

I have trouble making and keeping friends.

There are multiple intertwining reasons for that.
Some,possibly many, are my fault and then there's the types of people that I attract.
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Old 08-19-16, 03:26 AM
sybil sybil is offline

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Re: Who has trouble making and keeping friends?

I cannot seem to keep friends but maybe I just come on too strong. I don't have any friends from childhood like so many people I know. My sister doesn't seem to have any problems with friends but seems to have symptoms of ADD.

Sometimes I hear a conversation. I don't know if it's appropriate to join in. It's hard for me to tell if I am interfering or not. Also, I have a hard time telling if someone has gotten bored with what I am talking about. It seems that the things I find so interesting don't seem to interest others as much, at least sometimes that is the case.
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