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  #61  
Old 08-24-09, 08:31 PM
Crisgo79 Crisgo79 is offline
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Re: Porn/Massterbation Addiction

Being single and alone is one of the biggest challenges. Its every mans fight. To be pure is a struggle. We all fall. I think what you need to do is have good distractions. That could be in the form of exercising, reading, listening to some music or engaging in some form of relaxing activity with others.

I agree, as long as it is not consuming your life too much. If you get your credit card bill for the month and find $100 from purchasing porn, thats a problem. I would take things slow in moderation. Then see what happens.
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  #62  
Old 08-25-09, 01:32 AM
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Re: Porn/Massterbation Addiction

Quote:
Originally Posted by raidermp5 View Post
I do both but not at a level that it's a problem. I have found out I always have to have something in my mouth be it food, gum, or food. If i don't have anything lots of time I just start chewing on stuff.
I am the same way, I ALWAYS have something in my mouth but usually its biting my nails or chewing gum. I really wish I could stop, its embarrassing when I get into situations where people notice my nails. (work, interviews, eating with others)
On the topic of masterbating, I have the urge to do this everyday to porn, but I think its a way my body is self medicating because of the calming feeling that comes afterwards. I have done this for years as well. I have only been diagnosed with adult ADD for 3.5 years now. All this really wears me out, I just with I could be normal..
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  #63  
Old 08-25-09, 09:39 PM
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Re: Porn/Massterbation Addiction

Quote:
Originally Posted by glxwill View Post
this is not an exclusive add/adhd thing.
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Originally Posted by glxwill View Post

many comedians have used this topic for the subject of their jokes.

i believe it's a normal average guy thing.


My mind asks its self: Is this guy lost?

"this is not an exclusive add/adhd thing."

I agree.

"i believe it's a normal average guy thing"

wtf?

"many comedians have used this topic for the subject of their jokes."

........


I'veread a post online in which a guy asked if it was ok to masturbate once a month.

Is libido corellated to ADD/ADHD/ ADHD-I?

Dont know. I have ADHD-I (Non hyperactive) And I've gone from masturbating up to 3 times a day as a teen, to once every few weeks. Im 21. Amphetamines are STIMULANTS. The drug will raise your sexual stimulation, similar to red ginseng. I have no Doubt that you can differentiate sexual love and sexual domination/submissiveness even while on the drug. I rarely watch porn anymore, and I know of the great energy produced by two people who want to serve each other, and see each as equal. This is when you SHARE sex.

When you masturbate and have no desire or emotion toward the stimulusm, you OWN sex. You can also be OWNED by sex, hence dominatrixes and submissiveness. (submissiveness can be shared, but is is then more considered who is in a better position for action

You actually can transfer energy, and have multiple orgasms (male and female, but males have multiple mini orgasms)

If you have sex with someone, and you take alot of time stimulating eachother, touching, talking, LOVING, feeling, knowing before actualintercourse, and embrace sex by going very slow and having that be better than any other sex youve had, you wont be as stimulated to masturbate so much. I can have the best sex with someone with my eyes closed, or in the others' eyes the whole time. The energy that you cant see overrules everything that you can.

Hope this helped




Raider:mp5 said:
"I do both but not at a level that it's a problem. I have found out I always have to have something in my mouth be it food, gum, or food. If i don't have anything lots of time I just start chewing on stuff."

I say:

I've heard somewhere that people go through an "oral fixation stage" when they are todlers, the same time they get their baby teeth. If you don't "complete this stage" or your sub conscious hasnt left that stage, it will continue throughout ones lifetime i.e. thumb sucking, nail biting, constant oral stimulation. I think that this makes sense. On the other hand, 2 people i know both have ADHD and both bite their nails, one of them needs to do it constantly, the other doesnt. I dont bite my nails It could go either way? It's a real "nail-biter!" (I know thats lame, and yes, I had to do it hahaha)
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  #64  
Old 08-26-09, 11:17 AM
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Re: Porn/Massterbation Addiction

I am just going to say something about this. I am not sure that it is just a "men's problem". I as a female would say it could possibly be and ADD/HD thing. I as a female can very much relate.
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  #65  
Old 08-27-09, 04:17 AM
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Re: Porn/Massterbation Addiction

My first post--but felt I have a few thoughts: Masturbation, in the opinion of most whom I respect, is a harmless, relaxing thing. Also, it has the obvious advantages regarding not having to make a committment to a person, or any medical or legal considerations.
I think if one has already made a committment to another, common sense is the answer to "will this keep me from committments (promises) I have made?"
I remermber a public figure--married to a woman--and a sex act with a man emerged. He whined that he was "gay", and I feel it was not a "gay vs straight" issue, but that he had cheated on the wife. Not that this was not forgiveable--not making that judgment, but feel he was confused as to fact "infidelity" not "orientation" was issue.
One caution I make: Be careful Porn does not lead you to something else you do not want, such as "substance abuse"--it easily can.

In winding this up, I think, regarding others, just don't lie. If you prefer "aloneness", fine, but kind of let the other know. I think only not being truthful is issue one has to worry about.
Be sure whatever you do, good, bad, or what (again no judgment call here)--just that what you do regularly, be sure you think it is OK to continue, as such becomes "habit". If comfortable with that--fine. But don't think things that are pleasure can be "turned on and off like a water faucett".

I hope this helps someone--my best to you and all our readers. Feel free to E Mail me if I can help in any way.
Friend Jeff



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  #66  
Old 08-27-09, 04:36 AM
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Re: Porn/Massterbation Addiction

Hello--
Saw the posting by mmt78. I think my main post would apply to ladies in terms of the major questions. I do, however, think there could be little "nuances" that are particular to ladies different from men. We seem to both get things done--but often in very different styles.
This being an ADHD forum, I think that sex could be very much changed by ADHD, but maybe just in "style"--I can't think of any issues that would be different--to me, it comes down to doing what is comfortable--even if different than the norm, but just don't let another expect what you cannot or are not going to want to do.

Best to everyone--anyone feel free to E Mail--am doing research on Adult Adhd, and have some different slants--for anyone who is interested. I see a lot from "successful people", and, although I feel their pain and discomfort, I think many, who cannot communicate in these forums, may be hurting bad--many who have severe problems (legal, etc), and am doing some writing to help them. I think other issues than just distractability and hyper behavior--but some confusion in thinking --is being missed. E Mail if you want to.

Friend Jeff

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  #67  
Old 09-08-09, 10:23 AM
The_Subreption The_Subreption is offline
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Re: Porn/Massterbation Addiction

been addicted for 12 years, ridiculous level of addiction. yes, it releases not only dopa and serotonin, but also oxytocin and endorphines.

i recently sought help online, and it says to treat it as a chemical addiction, which is a helpful way of looking at it. brain scans of addicts on porn are like crack addicts on crack. it is INSANELY addictive. and of course, the harder (!) you try to refrain, the more difficult, as cum is just building and building up.

i recently installed K9 software, and highly recommend it. it has decent anti-surfing settings you can select from, and also allows you to ban select words from appearing in URLs. previous software i used i always deleted, as a lot of normal sites were not getting accessed either, but not so with K9.

the trick is to have a really long administrator password with arbitrary letters, like, "r8cdjwu7393nw5". then hide the password on a piece of paper.

it really works. you could even give the password to a friend or whatever so you can never find it (it is possible that you may need to go in sometimes to de-bar legitimate sites).

once installed, right click on the symbol and click 'run as administrator' to vary settings.

i would also like software that bars certain web sites at certain times of day. for example, would be good to ban youtube during working hours.

i find the above K9 approach so much more successfull than mere will power, which is never likely to work.

best of luck, don't waste any more hours on it, it is INSANELY addictive for those of us with ultra high sex drives - I could easily spend 6 hours a day watching porn to be honest.
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  #68  
Old 09-19-09, 01:13 PM
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Re: Porn/Massterbation Addiction

I was just browsing through the thread subjects, and noticed this one - I admit I didn't read the whole thread (its long!!!) But I wanted to copy something I posted on another thread to a guy who was worried about his compulsive sexual behaviors.

I myself have worried off and on if I might be a sex addict - I think about and fantasize about sex alot while doing other things, and can never seem to get enough.
But then I ran across this...I just started reading: "Driven to Distraction" by Edward M Hallowell, MD, and John J. Ratey, MD. To quote an example passage specific to this:

The impact of ADD upon sexuality is poorly understood. However, we have seen many people in our practice, both men and women, who complain of either an inability to pay attention during sex well enough to enjoy it, or the opposite: a hyperfocused hypersexuality.

Those who appear to be hypersexual may turn to sex as a form of intense stimulation to help them focus. Many adults with ADD are drawn to high-stimulus situations as a means of alleviating boredom or clearing their mind of distraction. Some get involved in physically dangerous activities, such as racecar-driving, or vertical skiiing, or bungee-jumping or they get involved in risky activities like gambling or dangerous romances. They do these things as a means of focusing themselves; they focus around the high stimulation. For some adults with ADD, sex acts as a kind of stimulating medication, and they use it to find not only the pleasure of orgasm, but the pleasure of being focused.

Masturbation is just another sexual behavior that would produce this focusing effect.
And as for the porn element - well this fits the profile, too. Its intense stimulation, and in fact, can be whatever the viewer wants it to be in the moment...if they're bored, they can always find something different, and they can bounce around from image to image as fast as their attention shifts. Thats not neccesarily a good thing, as it can set unreasonable expectations, or make them less responsive to "normal" sexuality with a partner...but its easy to see how an ADDer might seek out that intensity of stimulation...
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  #69  
Old 09-22-09, 12:12 PM
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Thumbs up Re: Porn/Massterbation Addiction

I only discovered the following books, after 14 years with the ADD diagnosis 314.01 and consistent, appropriate use of stimulants, provided to me by my Psychiatrist. After a recent failed marriage, I have read the following books in the past 3 years.........I can't change the past, but maybe these books will offer healthy insight to another........................
"Out of the Shadows" Patrick Carnes Ph.D (2001) www.hazeldon.org
"In the Shadows of the Net" Patrick Carnes Ph.D (2001) www.hazeldon.org
"The Porn Trap" Wendy Maltz LCSW,DST (2006) ISBN 978-0-06-123186-5
a/k/a The Essential Guide to Overcoming Problems Caused by Pornography
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  #70  
Old 09-25-09, 04:31 AM
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Re: Porn/Massterbation Addiction

It's plain and simple everyone.. ADD is a deficiancy of dopamine to the REWARD center of the brain. Because of this deficiancy.. ADD people look for other ways just to feel stimulated like a normal person.. The main examples are ofcourse: FOOD, DRUGS, and along with drugs.. SEX. Now because someone has ADD they feel the easiest way to feel "stimulated" is through an orgasm.. It's quick, it's easy, it makes you feel normal or even better after. The only reason the focusing comes into picture is because it takes longer and longer everytime you do it to get a reaction.. I've been addicted to porn for MANY years.. I'm 24 and have ruined many relationships because of it.. It's not healthy to look at porn to FILL the "Void" of pleasure us with ADD don't just get have normally.. But if you are in a relationship.. it's going to diminish what you have by degrading the person you are with and make it harder to make the intiment times mean anything.. It's only healthy if you are alone.. ALSO Keep in mind that i'm only talking about porn... MASTURBATION is healthy.. Porn is not.. Come on, use your hyperfocus ability to analyze the fact that you know nothing good is going to come from looking at porn.. HAHA I am such a hypocrit.. I looked at porn today I hate ADD
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Old 09-25-09, 02:52 PM
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Re: Porn/Massterbation Addiction

I also think that it's not a form of self-injury
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  #72  
Old 12-09-18, 11:05 PM
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Re: Porn/Massterbation Addiction

Many report a decrease of libido (mostly those taking high doses for many years)

It seems that once habituation has not occurred, ie starting Adderall or other stimulants, more report an increase in obsessive sexual behavior
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  #73  
Old 12-13-18, 01:55 PM
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Re: Porn/Massterbation Addiction

I disagree. I I do not think the reward center in our brains being altered causes us to engage in full on risky behavior. I think the propensity exists along with genetics. I am am alcoholic in recovery but it wasnt just the adhd, the adhd made the immediate gratification better but the drive to drink was all me and my defects and the way I was raised and genetics in my opinion. I do not support porn because of the way women are portrayed or treated but I wont condem anyone who looks at it because we are all human. But I think blaming obssessive masturbation or addiction to sex or porn as an adhd does a great disservice to those of us with adhd. I believe people with those problems also have other stuff psychologically going on.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Seanhasanexcuse View Post
It's plain and simple everyone.. ADD is a deficiancy of dopamine to the REWARD center of the brain. Because of this deficiancy.. ADD people look for other ways just to feel stimulated like a normal person.. The main examples are ofcourse: FOOD, DRUGS, and along with drugs.. SEX. Now because someone has ADD they feel the easiest way to feel "stimulated" is through an orgasm.. It's quick, it's easy, it makes you feel normal or even better after. The only reason the focusing comes into picture is because it takes longer and longer everytime you do it to get a reaction.. I've been addicted to porn for MANY years.. I'm 24 and have ruined many relationships because of it.. It's not healthy to look at porn to FILL the "Void" of pleasure us with ADD don't just get have normally.. But if you are in a relationship.. it's going to diminish what you have by degrading the person you are with and make it harder to make the intiment times mean anything.. It's only healthy if you are alone.. ALSO Keep in mind that i'm only talking about porn... MASTURBATION is healthy.. Porn is not.. Come on, use your hyperfocus ability to analyze the fact that you know nothing good is going to come from looking at porn.. HAHA I am such a hypocrit.. I looked at porn today I hate ADD
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  #74  
Old 12-14-18, 12:04 AM
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Re: Porn/Massterbation Addiction

Yeah, I agree with Sarah. People on this forum tend to lay a whole lot at the feet of ADHD. Personally, I don't really like what porn stands for or how it makes me feel about the human race, and in my case it's because of how f---ing lost the people in the amateur porn especially come across. Like they have lost their souls, just rutting around. Why are you putting this stuff on the internet, people? It makes me bummed about the world we live in. But then again, when I feel that pressure and I need release, I have no problem pulling up pornhub and masturbating real quick. I shouldn't feel guilty about it, but I do feel a bit down on myself afterwards.
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Old 12-14-18, 02:38 AM
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Re: Porn/Massterbation Addiction

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Originally Posted by DanielGM1970 View Post
Yeah, I agree with Sarah. People on this forum tend to lay a whole lot at the feet of ADHD. Personally, I don't really like what porn stands for or how it makes me feel about the human race, and in my case it's because of how f---ing lost the people in the amateur porn especially come across. Like they have lost their souls, just rutting around. Why are you putting this stuff on the internet, people? It makes me bummed about the world we live in. But then again, when I feel that pressure and I need release, I have no problem pulling up pornhub and masturbating real quick. I shouldn't feel guilty about it, but I do feel a bit down on myself afterwards.
this is something im always on the fence about

on one hand, its obvious all of us adhders here are great people, coupled with self perception (distorted or not) . Ive formed a phenotype of ADHD in my mind . I feel insulted when people blame deviant behavior on ADHD. Like it somehow reflects us as a whole



other the hand, sometimes I just look at ADHD as a group of symptoms without any specific origin that include poor self regulation. the inability to regulate emotions. the inability to sustain goal directed behavior . the inability the inhibit behavior that interferes with future goals despite consequences'

these behaviors that science tells us make us about 50 times more likely than the general population to become addicted to unhealthy external stimulus, substances, behaviors, etc

now, where does the morality of the particular's fit in. completely separate from ADHD?


probably. but I don't know that ADHD has a morality of any type , good or bad affiliated with it
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