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  #16  
Old 07-28-17, 05:16 PM
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Re: The what's bothering you RIGHT NOW thread Part IV

Just requested a theory test (driving) and don't know whether instructor has to book it or if I have to book it and it's making me nervous
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  #17  
Old 07-29-17, 04:43 AM
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Re: The what's bothering you RIGHT NOW thread Part IV

I hope you're feeling better, Lunacie
Goodness it's quiet around here this morning!
I should have gone out 2 hours ago, now I'll have to hurry a bit
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Old 07-29-17, 05:34 AM
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Re: The what's bothering you RIGHT NOW thread Part IV

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I hope you're feeling better, Lunacie
Goodness it's quiet around here this morning!
I should have gone out 2 hours ago, now I'll have to hurry a bit
Fuzzy is never here anymore. Psycho is never here anymore.

I wanted to sleep longer but it takes me forever to get ready. Super busy day. Walk the Big Doggie, water, re-adjust sprinkler heads, try to keep the Olde Battleship happy, get squirrel food...make appt. for oil change...
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Old 07-29-17, 06:25 AM
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Re: The what's bothering you RIGHT NOW thread Part IV

Usually i am at the grocery store checkout by now, I havent even had coffee yet.
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  #20  
Old 07-29-17, 07:00 AM
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Re: The what's bothering you RIGHT NOW thread Part IV

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Usually i am at the grocery store checkout by now, I havent even had coffee yet.
so, what exactly are you doing?
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  #21  
Old 07-29-17, 09:18 AM
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Re: The what's bothering you RIGHT NOW thread Part IV

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so, what exactly are you doing?
I was actually in the cafe , writing my list
Iwent out so late, i just didnt want to get going, at all
ahh then they delivered groceries earlier than expected
anyway thats all done so i can nap now
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  #22  
Old 07-29-17, 10:54 AM
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Re: The what's bothering you RIGHT NOW thread Part IV

Things re looking up! I found the elusive, cheap, no waste, $6 a bag cheaper squirrel delight so I bought them all. Betty would have.
I always get chided for this and I did tell them more than once to halt it whenever they want to. LOL wants this, she alludes to it frequently, and pulls silent jobs on me if I don't do it. I'd rather do it before the dramatics begin.

oooo! I found the ultra cheap and the dogs lOVE them more than any kind ever. Alpo(???!!!) multi-flavoured snaps. Gawd, they act like I'm giving them something real they get so excited over them. Four coloured even.

I'm going to fuel up. My basic $7-ish.

Big Doggie performed like the Street Champion.
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  #23  
Old 07-29-17, 10:57 AM
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Re: The what's bothering you RIGHT NOW thread Part IV

I want to stay home. Its dark, its cool, its going to rain and the Douquetteness of my apartment calls me.


duty beckons
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  #24  
Old 07-29-17, 02:04 PM
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Re: The what's bothering you RIGHT NOW thread Part IV

I feel like such a horrible person for not liking my dad much. I feel bad that I don't help him more. It's like he needs a hero in his life right now, and instead I've abandoned him.
It feels like ****...and I keep hoping that things will just magically happen and will become easier. I can do what I need for me, so I can start doing more for my dad too.

My dad's watching a couple of kids today for respite...I should be helping him. I told him I was going to.
I don't think I'm going to.

I'm just not much of a good person to my poor dad.

I know I shouldn't worry about it. But I do.
I know I shouldn't dwell over it. But I do.

And it bugs me to no end because my dad acts so oblivious. He's NO idea why I hold so many grudges against him...he's NO idea why I don't like him or like to be around him. /cry. It's driving me nuts!

I miss my mom. She understood. lol she spent damn near 25% of her time complaining about how miserable my dad made her!

(((Mom)))

God I miss you for things like this Mom. I wish I had you back so I could be understood and validated in this.
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  #25  
Old 07-29-17, 02:11 PM
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Re: The what's bothering you RIGHT NOW thread Part IV

psycho you're not a horrible person
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  #26  
Old 07-29-17, 02:28 PM
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Re: The what's bothering you RIGHT NOW thread Part IV

I also went off on my dad yesterday...and it was pretty damn harsh. I think it was too harsh for him and I'm feeling like hell about that too.

You know how they say some people say things in anger that they don't really mean? I don't know if I fully believe that...and it's certainly not true with me. When I get angry and say things...I mean precisely what I say, even if I do feel guilty for voicing the feelings afterwards.

I went over to get a couple of things done with him yesterday...and he again started in on me how I he doesn't get any help from me. I don't deny it...I haven't been much help to him. I told him I can just very barely get the basics done for myself let alone help him.
He got all snooty and said that he and his brothers sure wouldn't treat their parents this way! They'd take damn good care of their parents!

So I went off. I didn't yell or anything, but my words were hurtful.

I told him that I just don't like him. That I stopped liking him years ago. That it's great that he's doing so well over these past 4 months and I've seen a huge improvement with his attitude and depression over these months...but that I think it's too late for him. He lost me years ago.

I told him I don't like being around him. We have very little in common, he wont let me talk to him when I need emotional support because he physically cuts me off or flat out ignores me...and I can't stand talking to him in the first place because he forgets everything I tell him 15 minutes later (and I'm not kidding! I don't know wtf this is!).

I told him it's overwhelming he wants me to take over everything for him...that I'm not mom and I'm not good at all these kinds of things (paying bills, taking care of paperwork, doing all the billing and stuff for his respite care job)...and how it frustrates me because I get so little help from him because he's so freaking unbelievably incompetent and dumb.

...
I've went off on him like this before.
I don't know WTF is wrong with my dad. I suspect he dissociates. I don't think he even registered the gravity of what I told him yesterday. I don't think he things I was serious. He just got into a good mood after I went off on him and acted as if it never happened.
I don't get it.

I feel bad for being such an *** to him. He's got it super rough right now in life.
But I did mean every word I said.

/sigh

I don't like feeling like a creep.
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Old 07-29-17, 02:32 PM
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Re: The what's bothering you RIGHT NOW thread Part IV

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psycho you're not a horrible person
/hearts his Midsy-Widsy

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Old 07-29-17, 02:34 PM
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Re: The what's bothering you RIGHT NOW thread Part IV

Wind up time at work yesterday: apparently someone at work has a crush on me.

Not sure how to approach the subject to find out if it's true (haha Dumbo just became real and flew past the window in purple and yellow polka dot pajamas) or whether it's people at work trying to wind me up.

If it was a wind-up it didn't work, I don't believe them
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Old 07-29-17, 02:39 PM
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Re: The what's bothering you RIGHT NOW thread Part IV

I don't know, but if they're only winding you up and doing it because they think it's in anyway fun to play with your emotions like that...I'mma fly all the way over there so I can beat them with a bat.

Then I'mma kick them in their shins!
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Old 07-29-17, 02:40 PM
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Re: The what's bothering you RIGHT NOW thread Part IV

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